Leaving a 16-1/2 Year Old Home Alone for 3 Days (accident, daughter, husband)
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Every responsible kid has friends and at least one unsavory friend. Notice you are trying to make yourself feel better by tacking on the 1/2 to his age...as if hoping that extra 6 months makes a difference. The kid will be fine for three days..but no matter how nice the guy is---his "friends" will invade your house...other than that...go for it. IF YOU DARE
Every responsible kid has friends and at least one unsavory friend. Notice you are trying to make yourself feel better by tacking on the 1/2 to his age...as if hoping that extra 6 months makes a difference. The kid will be fine for three days..but no matter how nice the guy is---his "friends" will invade your house...other than that...go for it. IF YOU DARE
Wow - I haven't had the chance to check in over the weekend, I really appreciate all of your responses. Just to clarify -there are a couple of friends who he could stay with but prefers to be at home by himself. On those three days he will be working 8 hours per day and just be home at night.
We're going to sit down with him this evening to hear his side and then we will make a decision. I'm less sure now whether we should let him stay. Some of the stories I've read here are scaring the heck out of me!
My parents left me home alone when I was fifteen. Like your son, I had responsibilities, and couldn't go on vacation with them, and I never had a party. I was off to college when I was seventeen, and if your son hasn't ever been left alone, I would think this would be a chance for you and for him to see how it goes. As long as you have someone checking in on him, I think you'll be fine. That said, it DOES depend on the child, and on the neighborhood/community you live in.
Wow - I haven't had the chance to check in over the weekend, I really appreciate all of your responses. Just to clarify -there are a couple of friends who he could stay with but prefers to be at home by himself. On those three days he will be working 8 hours per day and just be home at night.
We're going to sit down with him this evening to hear his side and then we will make a decision. I'm less sure now whether we should let him stay. Some of the stories I've read here are scaring the heck out of me!
Don't worry about the horror stories - you know your son best and know whether he is mature enough and capable of staying home.
We are leaving for vacation in a few weeks. Our 16-1/2 yo son would like to skip the 1st three days of it and join us later (us = mom, dad & 11 yo daughter). He is participating in a 7 week summer internship and if he takes vacation the entire week, he will be working later into the summer and cut into the free time before he gets into HS X-country training. Also, he says getting too old for these "family vacations" and rather spend time with his friends.
I (dad) am leaning toward saying yes. Of course, we would be in constant contact with him on those days and have friends and neighbors checking in. My wife is leaning towards no, saying he should go on the entire vacation.
He is generally a very responsible kid. Honor student, lots of xtra cirricular activities, sports. Some of his friends though tend to be a little wild. I'm looking for feedback from parents who have been in a similar situation or any parent who has an opinion.
If you have reliable neighbors that can do in person checks a couple times a day and also be avilable to him in case of emergency I'd do it.
lovesMountains - you make a great deal of sense and to be honest, my gut tells me he'll be OK. My wife and I, unfortunately, are not quite on the same page on this. We'll be discussing this among ourselves before we sit down with our son but I'm fairly confident I'll be able to convince her he can handle it. This is a kid who takes a bus and the subway to a 40 hr/week internship 5 days a week...he's responsible.
lovesMountains - you make a great deal of sense and to be honest, my gut tells me he'll be OK. My wife and I, unfortunately, are not quite on the same page on this. We'll be discussing this among ourselves before we sit down with our son but I'm fairly confident I'll be able to convince her he can handle it. This is a kid who takes a bus and the subway to a 40 hr/week internship 5 days a week...he's responsible.
Good for you Dad. I'm on the side of trust them until they prove otherwise.
Good for you Dad. I'm on the side of trust them until they prove otherwise.
You and me both.
I always told my kids, be where you are supposed to be, doing what you are supposed to be doing and you will earn more and more of my trust so that you can continue to have more and more freedom.
Failure to be where you are supposed to be, doing what you are supposed to be doing means you have lost my trust and I will now be all over you like white on rice.
After shadowing my kid in school for a whole day when he was an obnoxious 7th grader who was becoming the class clown he never failed to "gain my trust" from that day forward
lovesMountains - you make a great deal of sense and to be honest, my gut tells me he'll be OK. My wife and I, unfortunately, are not quite on the same page on this. We'll be discussing this among ourselves before we sit down with our son but I'm fairly confident I'll be able to convince her he can handle it. This is a kid who takes a bus and the subway to a 40 hr/week internship 5 days a week...he's responsible.
Let us know how it goes opus
These are not easy decisions, but only a good parent would agonize over the right thing to do - so good for you
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