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Old 08-02-2013, 03:03 PM
 
13,979 posts, read 25,889,429 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Joe the Photog View Post
This is really the best advice of the thread so far. The OP is worried about not being able to sleep, but isn't too concerned that one of the things the kid is apparently doing is being on the computer half of the night. I'd certainly block the computer. We already do that with our kids. You have to log on to the computer and they don't know the passwords. We were also having a heck of a time getting them to do their chores as required during the day this summer, so we blocked cable through the TWC Parental Controls.

Another good point. We are doing that with our son who is more the night owl than his sister. It's not been easy, but he's coming around. School will help in a few weeks.

As for the rest, close your bedroom door and get a fan. It works wonders for us. The fan stays on every night, year round and typically blows directly toward a wall so it doesn't get us cold.
Not every teen who uses the internet at night is up to no good. I'm frequently online at 2:00 am, reading various news sites myself. Granted, I'm not a teen, but I have never done anything nefarious online either. Innocent until proven guilty in my eyes.

The OP never mentioned tv, but has mentioned her daughter gets up for school and gets her work done without any issues. +1 for the teen.

I agree, close the door, use a fan, and try earplugs.

I think apartment living, when shared by a night owl and a light sleeper, calls for accommodations on both parties. Mom can't make a non-sleepy teen sleep, but she can request the noise level be kept down. The teen should be cognizant of any unnecessary noise she makes, as well as take responsibility for things such as making sure the lights are off and the refrigerator door is shut. Mom does need to give a little here though, the teen's behavior isn't so awful. If Mom doesn't, it's a control issue, and one she cannot win.
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Old 08-02-2013, 04:26 PM
 
Location: San Marcos, TX
2,570 posts, read 7,727,037 times
Reputation: 4059
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mattie View Post
Not every teen who uses the internet at night is up to no good. I'm frequently online at 2:00 am, reading various news sites myself. Granted, I'm not a teen, but I have never done anything nefarious online either. Innocent until proven guilty in my eyes.
I agree. I don't see any reason to be suspicious and paranoid about late night internet usage with a teen who has not given you a reason NOT to trust them.

My teen is up late playing League of Legends with a friend of his who is also a night owl -- said friend lives about 30 minutes away but they used to go to school together, and don't get to hang out as much anymore in person, so this is how they "hang out".

My mother used to think that anything that happened after midnight was automatically "bad'. She's a morning person, I'm not. The truth was, any wicked deeds I was taking part in, I could just as easily have carried out in the afternoon. If someone is going to do things they aren't supposed to, limiting the time frame isn't going to stop anything. I did plenty of "bad things" in the hours after school before she got home from work.

Treating an otherwise good kid like a bad one isn't going to ever help anything.
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Old 08-02-2013, 04:27 PM
 
15,499 posts, read 10,440,480 times
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Sounds like she's a typical night owl, I do think you guys can compromise though. I would turn off all electronics at midnight and let her read a book. She's only 15, staring at the computer could ruin her eyesight. Since milk is expensive, the powdered milk suggestion is good. To avoid her cooking, stock up on whatever fruit is on sale (bananas are cheap). If your room is stuffy, her room is probably stuffy too. I'd buy two fans, I know I have trouble falling asleep without air circulation. She really does sound like a smart kid, I bet you guys can work this out.

Last edited by elan; 08-02-2013 at 04:41 PM..
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Old 08-02-2013, 05:14 PM
 
Location: Not where I want to be
4,829 posts, read 8,710,492 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rxpx40 View Post
Funny, no one even asked exactly what the girl is doing on the computer into the wee hours of the night. Yes, she's a good kid. Does all her chores, etc etc. OK. I know! Their phones are now as powerful as their computers!! Mom, Are you monitoring your daughter's computer exploits? Who is she talking with? Is she gaming? You might want to see what is keeping her up all night on the computer. Figure out the source. If she's writing a book, that's a different story.

I check her computer and phone all the time. She's not gaming at all. The vast majority of her internet activity is finding dance videos, choreographers, and creating her own choreography. She also writes songs sometimes.
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Old 08-02-2013, 05:24 PM
 
13,250 posts, read 9,872,112 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Amisi View Post
I check her computer and phone all the time. She's not gaming at all. The vast majority of her internet activity is finding dance videos, choreographers, and creating her own choreography. She also writes songs sometimes.
Oh, well that explains it. Very few musical people create at nine am. She's doing what every songwriter I know does - at first anyway, until it's their job - and works at night. That not unusual at all.
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Old 08-02-2013, 06:06 PM
 
745 posts, read 1,502,186 times
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At midnight, all you need to do is two things, then you'll be fine.

1. Disconnect the internet.

2. Remove the cards out of the cable boxes.

I'd bet anything she stops within a few days.
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Old 08-02-2013, 06:45 PM
 
355 posts, read 1,229,104 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Amisi View Post
My daughter is almost 15. She is a good kid in every way except one.... She's developed a habit of staying up very late. We live in a small apartment and, all night, all I hear is her going back/forth to the kitchen, opening the fridge, taking something (milk or juice), going back to her room, dancing, click-click-click on the computer, etc etc etc.

Last night, I was up until after 3am with this! I kept telling her to GO TO BED! She would quiet down for a while but then back to the nonsense. She actually stayed up all night and didn't go to sleep until 10pm tonight.

I am not getting a good night's sleep at all. I find myself constantly waking up all night long to tell her to turn off lights, get out of kitchen, go to bed, etc etc etc. This isn't something that just developed over the summer ---- she would do it a few times a week during the school year, too.

I am at my wits end with this. I need to be able to sleep without worrying about her leaving the fridge open or drinking a gallon of milk in one day or cooking something and falling asleep while it's cooking and causing a fire. I've considered a lock on the fridge and the pantry, but that just doesn't sit right with me.


Any constructive thoughts or suggestions??
Buy her one of those mini-fridges and put it in her room. You can get one for like $30 at Walmart. Be very firm on her not disturbing you while you are trying to sleep, or you may have to ground or punish her until she gets the point. She shouldn't be dancing, and clicking on the computer all night. When I was kid (I'm still in my 20's), my mother would scream out if she would even hear the music through the headphones at night...she would always scream..."Turn that sh*t off and go to bed, NOW!" It may be a little harsh, but you shouldn't have to keep repeating yourself over and over and she keep refusing to listen....no ma'am. smh
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Old 08-03-2013, 12:40 AM
 
47,525 posts, read 69,565,345 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Amisi View Post
I check her computer and phone all the time. She's not gaming at all. The vast majority of her internet activity is finding dance videos, choreographers, and creating her own choreography. She also writes songs sometimes.
This is the way I see it -- it sounds to me like some parents would love it if their 15 year old was like yours. There are parents that have zero control and have no idea where their 15 year old is at 2 am. Your daughter seems content to be safe and happy in your home and isn't doing anything bad at all.

Also in just a few short years, your daughter will likely be moved away and you may despise the silence. You could just tell yourself "this too will pass" and savor the moments, be glad your daughter there even if you have to adapt a little to her staying up when you would prefer she was asleep. It could be so much worse.
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Old 08-03-2013, 01:02 AM
 
1,851 posts, read 3,393,619 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Amisi View Post
I check her computer and phone all the time. She's not gaming at all. The vast majority of her internet activity is finding dance videos, choreographers, and creating her own choreography. She also writes songs sometimes.
Quote:
Originally Posted by FinsterRufus View Post
Oh, well that explains it. Very few musical people create at nine am. She's doing what every songwriter I know does - at first anyway, until it's their job - and works at night. That not unusual at all.
^^Explains a lot and I concur with FinsterRufus. Sounds like your daughter is artistically inclined and this sort of behavior is very normal (not unusual) for many artists. Have a talk with her about coming up with some compromises and let her know she's affecting others in the household. There have been some good tips offered here. I wouldn't worry about the milk either...you can buy milk in bulk at some grocery stores. Are you a member of Costco or Sam's Club? Target may sell it a bit cheaper too.

I mean, your daughter could be up all night on FB or tweeting and engaging in risky behavior. She's not doing that at all. She's actually trying to perfect her love of music and dance. Might pay off for her one day. Surely you can be somewhat proud of that, no?
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Old 08-03-2013, 04:57 AM
 
Location: Canada
6,615 posts, read 6,514,608 times
Reputation: 18433
Our oldest son was similar to this as a teenager. He didn't sleep well as an infant either. He's now in his late 20's and is still a night hawk.

Shutting off everything might help, but I doubt it will make any difference on her staying awake late hours. As for the cooking, you DO have a smoke alarm if she happens to leave the stove on? The microwave is not a biggie at all. The fridge? well for the rare occasion she leaves it open, don't sweat this small thing.

Enjoy the fact that she's a good kid and safe at home. Believe me, being woken up by sounds from your child are a lot easier to take than being up all night worried because your child isn't home at all.

They grow up quickly and you'll miss those "kid" sounds in the night.
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