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I suppose the Mommy wars will go on as long as there are Mommies. But when my kids were in care, I could not have been called a full time Mommy. When I was at work, my attention was on my job. The assumption was that people I was paying to care for my children were actually doing that.
I disagree. Is Dad a 'part-time' Dad because he works?
My attention was always divided - always. Luckily, my job was flexible so I could be gone a good part of the day to volunteer at school and work later that evening.
A Mom is a mom 24/7 and hopefully the rest of her life.
The very best thing for a child probably is to have a SAHM --- but if and only if that SAHM is happy and not too stressed out. It's more important for a child to have parents that aren't too stressed or depressed. Sometimes part-time work is a good compromise.
Great point. The old saying ' if Mama ain't happy . . . . '
I guess I was very lucky that I worked for a company who was flexible and worked 'from home' for about 5 years. That does make working while raising a child so much easier.
I agree with this. I got a little concerned about the paycheck to paycheck part. What if something happens. Maybe you can get a part-time gig that you do from home when the kids nap/sleep at night? You guys need a little money in the savings account. Things happen.... You need to be able to provide for your children even if an emergency comes up, a car needs to be repaired, etc.
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Originally Posted by Joe the Photog
I'm all for SAHMs if it's not going to hurt financially, but this may have been a good thread to start before you had the oppurtunity to turn doan a job. On the other hand, kids that young could certainly use a good stable, enviroment that a SAHM can help nuture.
Thanks everyone, I am quite happy with the decision after sleeping on it!
After a 10 year career as a 911 operator, I'm quite happy to slow down the pace and take some time out with the babies before jumping into a new career
Glad you're happy. Peace of mind is a BIG clue you're going in the right direction.
911 is an incredibly difficult job. My hat is off to you. Now go forth and rock being a SAHM.
IMO, the best mom is a full time mom. As long as you can afford to be at home with your kids it is the best way to go. My wife was a SAHM until our daughter went to middle school and our daughter plans to be at home with our granddaughter until about the same age.
There is far more to being a mom than staying home or going to work and I find it odd to call one a full time mom and the other something else. That's wrong-headed thinking imo.
Well, I do have an education degree, for what it's worth. I might as well put years of university into my own kid. All my phones/storytimes/etc sitting dormant in the basement. That being said, I know it is normal to expect a 3 year old to have some type of formal education at 3-4 in the USA, but that is not standard where I live, so it is not really on my mind.
If you r going to educate ur child urself and u r qualified, ywould outside the home educ be needed? The children will be educated inside the home. Now if kids are not receiving educ inside the home and the mind is not being properly stimulated, then that is different.
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Originally Posted by aliss2
Well, I do have an education degree, for what it's worth. I might as well put years of university into my own kid. All my phones/storytimes/etc sitting dormant in the basement. That being said, I know it is normal to expect a 3 year old to have some type of formal education at 3-4 in the USA, but that is not standard where I live, so it is not really on my mind.
And I'm not sure how I feel about it. Part of me enjoys working a lot, but I'm just not sure if I am making the right decision in the long-term. Any experienced moms do this? How did things turn out?
My kids are 3.5 and 10 months. We are living paycheque to paycheque but we're doing okay (just no trips, new clothes, etc). We could use the money, but we'll live without it. I haven't worked since the youngest was a few months old.
I gave up my job as a pastry chef at the Waldorf to stay at home with my daughter. Best decision ever for me. The money is much tighter yes but I know where she is and who she's with. I ended up taking on my niece during the day who's 2 (my daughter is almost 4) so it worked well cause she has a playmate and I get extra cash.
I can teach her what I need and let her just play and be a kid. We are atheists and the only daycare providers in our town are christian or catholic schools and it was a fight to put her in and know they were doing mass for the kids then have to de-brainwash her on the weekends. Not only that, she was old enough to have limited communication but not old enough to actually tell me about her day. I picked her up one day and she had a dislocated arm. I was never called and I don't even know how long she went with her arm like that. I quit a few weeks later. Don't every question making the right decision for your kids. They aren't small forever and more great opportunities will come around when you're ready
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