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Old 11-13-2013, 09:49 PM
 
544 posts, read 609,395 times
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why hasn't this thread been closed yet? There's been like 600 posts.... I'm sure the OP has vented enough and the rest of us have had enough head aches.

 
Old 11-13-2013, 09:53 PM
 
43,011 posts, read 107,831,238 times
Reputation: 30715
Quote:
Originally Posted by HappyHarley View Post
why hasn't this thread been closed yet? There's been like 600 posts.... I'm sure the OP has vented enough and the rest of us have had enough head aches.
602 now.
 
Old 11-13-2013, 10:03 PM
 
6,129 posts, read 6,791,829 times
Reputation: 10821
Quote:
Originally Posted by malamute View Post

As far as bad parenting -- no two kids are the same so there isn't one magic book or one magic set of rules that work for all kids.
Pretty much.

We're all just dong the best we can. It's all we can do. There are no guarantees because there are just too many variables.

It's scary as hell. That's why I think people are so quick to judge other parents harshly sometimes. Everyone wants to think it can't happen to them, the other person must have done this or that wrong. But a lot of parenting is guesswork and luck of the draw IMO. Of course there are some general things to do that usually work well, but even those things are not 100% guarantees.

Everybody takes their turn on the screw up train. We're all just waiting for it to pull into our station.
 
Old 11-13-2013, 10:41 PM
 
6,497 posts, read 11,792,699 times
Reputation: 11124
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hopes View Post
Everyone who thinks she's using her father for money has forgotten DD1 has a good relationship with her father.
No one's forgotten... that's what made me think of it. She's taking advantage of him, if that's what's happening.
 
Old 11-13-2013, 10:45 PM
 
14,249 posts, read 17,885,317 times
Reputation: 13807
Quote:
Originally Posted by steelstress View Post
No one's forgotten... that's what made me think of it. She's taking advantage of him, if that's what's happening.
Outrageous. Just imagine, an 18 year old who doesn't drink and hasn't been arrested might be taking advantage of her father. Maybe if she had been drinking since she was 15 and getting into trouble with the law she would also have a relationship with her mother.
 
Old 11-13-2013, 10:49 PM
 
544 posts, read 609,395 times
Reputation: 474
Just imagine if people who worked for Jerry Springer or someone that does a show like that were smart and saw this thread, they could invite this family on TV and get HUGE RATINGS. Just make sure to post it on here so we all know when to watch.
 
Old 11-13-2013, 10:53 PM
 
Location: Round Rock, Texas
13,441 posts, read 15,411,159 times
Reputation: 18969
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tinawina View Post
Pretty much.

We're all just dong the best we can. It's all we can do. There are no guarantees because there are just too many variables.

It's scary as hell. That's why I think people are so quick to judge other parents harshly sometimes. Everyone wants to think it can't happen to them, the other person must have done this or that wrong. But a lot of parenting is guesswork and luck of the draw IMO. Of course there are some general things to do that usually work well, but even those things are not 100% guarantees.

Everybody takes their turn on the screw up train. We're all just waiting for it to pull into our station.
Wise words. Thank you for posting this.
 
Old 11-13-2013, 11:07 PM
 
6,497 posts, read 11,792,699 times
Reputation: 11124
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jaggy001 View Post
Outrageous. Just imagine, an 18 year old who doesn't drink and hasn't been arrested might be taking advantage of her father. Maybe if she had been drinking since she was 15 and getting into trouble with the law she would also have a relationship with her mother.
Yes, isn't it? Especially when she has declared her independence, and yet is smart enough to know which parent she can take advantage of to get that money she needs to maintain that independence! And they say the 15 yo is the smart one.
 
Old 11-14-2013, 01:36 AM
 
Location: Canada
169 posts, read 269,067 times
Reputation: 319
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ivorytickler View Post
My 18 yo moved in with her boyfriend. I am beside myself. This is such a mistake. I cannot believe his parents allowed her to move in with him in their house. She's going go the local community college and doesn't even have a job. I'm so afraid she won't finish school now. I can see her falling into the trap of getting pregnant thinking someone will take care of her. Her boyfriend is lucky to get 30 hours a week in. This is a disaster waiting to happen. What the hell is wrong with his parents?


On top of this, dd#2 (15) came home drunk from a party on Saturday and dh got the bright idea to run her into the police station where she was arrested and we now have to go to court. So she's a basket case. She keeps crying that she's a cheerleader and an honor student and shouldn't be going to court and about what ****ty parents she has and how her friends can tell their parents about parties and she has to lie....

I just want to sit down and cry.

I feel like a total failure as a mother right now. How did things get this screwed up?
Shes an Adult now, accept it and let her go.

I know its easier said then done.
 
Old 11-14-2013, 03:33 AM
 
Location: Whoville....
25,386 posts, read 35,466,787 times
Reputation: 14692
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dr. Lynnwood View Post
Shes an Adult now, accept it and let her go.

I know its easier said then done.
Yeah...that's my problem. She's not supposed to be an adult. She's still my baby. She comes by a few times a week so I do get to see her but I worry. That's what moms do.
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