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The only rules anyone over the age of 18 needs if they still live at home is:
1.When you come in don't wake me up or anyone else.
2. Get a job or go to school. Preferably both.
3. Clean up after yourself.
4. I'm not paying all your extras. Pay for your phone, car and extra food.
5. Keep your overnight guests quiet.
That's all I can think of.
All that's really needed.
If you're telling your adult child living at home what they can and can't do outside your house, w
if they can or can't spend the night at whoevers place they're seeing or giving them a strict arbitrary curfew, you're just controlling, treating them like a child and not letting them grow up. Plain and simple you're doing it wrong.
The only rules anyone over the age of 18 needs if they still live at home is:
1.When you come in don't wake me up or anyone else.
2. Get a job or go to school. Preferably both.
3. Clean up after yourself.
4. I'm not paying all your extras. Pay for your phone, car and extra food.
5. Keep your overnight guests quiet.
That's all I can think of.
All that's really needed.
Maybe that is perfect for your house..Others will
have other "house rules"
Maybe some don't want smoking, drinking, overnight guests, pets..
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
26,700 posts, read 41,718,665 times
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Lesson for anyone over 18 who is paying any type of compensation to their parents for room and board. Get a formal lease agreement drawn up and signed since with that payment you are in a landlord/tenant relationship per law and you have legal protections as a tenant. That agreement also protects you from abuses and if they want to kick you out, you are protected by eviction procedures.
I'm not a lawyer but I believe that once you take money for someone to live in your house you become a landlord and subject to landlord tenant law in your state. You have to consult a real lawyer if you want a true legal opinion but I do not think the value of the rent matters.
I'm not one either, but it seems that if you allow any adukt to live in your home, they might be considered a tenant if they pay $1000, or $300 or $0 a month and all have the same legal rights. It doesn't really matter to me, my kids know they have the option of moving out, they know that if they want to live in my house, it's their choice and mine and still my rules. If for example, I don't want smoking, assault weapons, drugs, or whatever in my house, than they can abide by my rules or remember where to find the door, and contributing to household costs doesn't change anything.
The only rules anyone over the age of 18 needs if they still live at home is:
1.When you come in don't wake me up or anyone else.
2. Get a job or go to school. Preferably both.
3. Clechild after yourself.
4. I'm not paying all your extras. Pay for your phone, car and extra food.
5. Keep your overnight guests quiet.
That's all I can think of.
All that's really needed.
If you're telling your adult child living at home what they can and can't do outside your house, w
if they can or can't spend the night at whoevers place they're seeing or giving them a strict arbitrary curfew, you're just controlling, treating them like a child and not letting them grow up. Plain and simple you're doing it wrong.
You forgot 6. Contribute to the household expenses, property taxes, home insurance, electric bill, garbage pickup, etc, etc if you want to be treated like an adult, then don't expect some free ride like a tiny child or that you only pay toward your own little toys.
That price sounds pretty steep unless you live in a really high rent city (my son considers himself very, very lucky to have found a small one bedroom apartment in San Francisco for only $2,200 a month & that does not include utilities). If he had found a place to live in a private home of a relative, with a private bedroom, even with sharing a bathroom & kitchen & living room for only $750 in rent including utilities he would have been ecstatic. Heck, he would have kissed their feet in joy and grateful appreciation each and every day!
Think of it this way, if you rent a bedroom in a private home your landlord probably would be well within their rights to set up reasonable rules, no loud parties, perhaps no overnight guests, no loud music after 10 PM, clean up the kitchen after you use it, do your own laundry, etc. It can not be compared to renting out a self contained apartment or half of duplex as a landlord.
This is a room in your private home. Wouldn't you have some type of rules if you rented it out to a stranger? Why is it wrong to have some type of rules if you rent it out to an adult child?
It's not, but that's not to say that a curfew is reasonable (Landlords don't do that to their tenants!)
A single mother told me very simply that she warns her kids ahead of time @18 they are out . She hasn't the means to support them period and jeopardizing their siblings is unfair to them. Period .
So the first one turned 18 she showed him the door ,he thought she was kidding, she was not .
From then on the rest of the kids knew that with out a doubt they too have to be doing something to be on their own by then, like it or not.
And there was no argument .
it is tough love, never the less it is love .
And if they do not appreciate her situation, it is they whom are not loving.
She's a really horrible parent. It's not tough love, it's borderline sinister.
So much for that 18 year old kid wanting to go to college eh?
It's not, but that's not to say that a curfew is reasonable (Landlords don't do that to their tenants!)
Exactly.
Landlords don't give tenants curfews.
They don't tell tenants they can't spend the night with their boyfriend.
They don't tell them what they can and can't go out and do.
They don't control what they do outside the house.
Sure landlords can tell tenants no smoking in the house but not no smoking at all.
They can't ground you and take belongings or privileges away as a punishment.
Its hard for me to charge them rent and then expect them to live by my rules. First off, they cannot afford rent with part time job and full time school. Plus, my rules don't violate safety hazards and obviously cleaner living. So obviously I don't charge rent, but I charge them car insurance, gym memberships and credit card they charged (in my name)...its much cheaper and they can afford it.
She's a really horrible parent. It's not tough love, it's borderline sinister.
So much for that 18 year old kid wanting to go to college eh?
shocking
Do landlords care if their tenants go to college? Will landlords reduce the rent so that going tuition can be paid?
A kid who wants to be treated as a tenant should not be helping themselves to the landlord's food, or expecting any sort of deal on rent.
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