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Im a senior in highschool currently and I was the same way I hated high school im not sure the type of high school your child goes to if its "ghetto" which is how my highschool was it made me misarble knowing that i couldnt be myself at school with out the risk of being bullying and being a first year of highschool i already was having anxiety and ive witnessed a lot of kids getting bullied freshmen year which even made my anxiety worse and is why I was home schooled for the first 2 years of high school because i couldnt take it anymore. Being around kids who are so immature and will do anything for attention really does suck.I went back to public school my junior year and everything was a lot better. Most "bullies" have dropped out or actually matured and everyone can be their self around school with out the thought of getting bullied. I hope this helped.
I haven't read all the posts here but would say he needs to get checked for depression. With few friends and hating school, he could be a ticking time bomb. Many folks jumped on the "he's a smart kid who needs to be challenged" bandwagon. I don't believe this is his issue. Many smart kids conform and do well in school.
All the other stuff he spouts is typical teenage stuff - doesn't need to take algebra, will never use it, etc.. I've heard this from my kids and so many others via their parents. He also sounds a little pandered to. Not saying you've done this but to tell a kid they are so smart, and often, it really not a good motivator. They can think they are better than others, smarter than others, it gives them a false sense of self and, can be de-motivating in the long run.
He may be feeling so different from other kids that he is withdrawing emotionally, socially, etc.. Or, he may have felt so special/important at his MS and now feels like a number in a larger school, or that the environ is intimidating and he's given up...who knows. I would want a counselor to see if this is one issue. As another poster said, you should start with his teachers, one on one with each of them. Find out if he's participating, turning in work, etc.. You need to know how he acts/reacts in class, if he interacts, etc..
The teens years, yes, years, can be incredibly challenging for parents if they aren't prepared. Hang in there!
He may be feeling so different from other kids that he is withdrawing emotionally, socially, etc..
The teens years, yes, years, can be incredibly challenging for parents if they aren't prepared. Hang in there!
I lean more towards this. He has his views and overalls, and even though he does not understand a lot of it, when he goes to school and mentions Communisim in class, or to a student, naturally, they are gonna think he is weird, or worse.
We have tried talking to him about this picture, and how its very offensive to people, etc. but he says..nobody likes anyone, if they are different.
I had bought him a Nike t-shirt. I ask him the other day, why he was not wearing it. He said,"because that's what everyone else wears, and he don`t wanna be like everyone else.
We are going to check out some phychologist in this area..for both this and losing his Dad!
I lean more towards this. He has his views and overalls, and even though he does not understand a lot of it, when he goes to school and mentions Communisim in class, or to a student, naturally, they are gonna think he is weird, or worse.
We have tried talking to him about this picture, and how its very offensive to people, etc. but he says..nobody likes anyone, if they are different.
I had bought him a Nike t-shirt. I ask him the other day, why he was not wearing it. He said,"because that's what everyone else wears, and he don`t wanna be like everyone else.
We are going to check out some phychologist in this area..for both this and losing his Dad!
I'm glad that you are taking him to see a psychologist. On the well known Holmes Stress/Depression Scale the very top stressor for a teen is death of a parent at 100 points, divorce is 65, and other very serious stressors are way down on the point values to 25 or 30. If I remember correctly a total score of 100 in a year can mean that the person is at a much higher risk for depression or serious health problems.
Of course, every teen is different, but it just shows that the death of a parent is not just a minor annoyance or something that most teens can just "get over" in a few days or a few weeks. The death of a parent is a very big deal in the life of a teen.
If your son is having problems in school and having problems with friends as well it appears to be a very serious "cry for help".
Perhaps, the death of your ex-husband didn't effect and bother you very much but it could have been absolutely devastating to your son even if he didn't/doesn't verbalize it to you or others.
PS. Visiting a counselor may not be a "quick fix". I'm not saying that you feel this way but I've known parents who thought two or three or a half dozen visits to a psychologist or psychiatrist should be enough to cure any problem when the child or teen actually needed to continue treatment for a longer period.
You need to hang around with and work with high I.Q. people to know these things, but for those who are glued to the TV, here is some reading on this (if you can't believe what I say)...
If you want to read more about this, search google.com for the following words including quotes...
genius "bad grades"
High IQ people get answers to question from Yahoo Answers? And from the Answer Bag? User submitted questions answered by users? With names like Spherical Cow you know it's Da' Troof!
You're saying that this conversation is proof that companies in the 80's recruited kids with bad grades to work as computer programmers? I should take the word of creativlyclngd as proof that your statement is true?
Geniuses getting a bad grade?
Did any geniuses and successful businessmen get C's, D's, or F's when they were in school.
Can you show me, since I'm a stupid TV watcher, where computer companies during the 80's went out of their way to hire kids from high school with bad grades to be computer programmers.
Last edited by Jaded; 05-09-2014 at 10:03 PM..
Reason: Copyright
If he hates it get him out! There are plenty of reasons to hate public school and plenty of alternatives. BTW Homeschooling is in fact an option. It can be done anytime or day including when one parent is home , or not at home, at night or on weekends. Talk to him about a reasonable contract and try it for a semester or a year. If you stick to the state guidelines he can go back with not too much trouble depending on your state. This is a very important time in his life and who is becomes is very much effected by the next few years. Feel free to IM me, I have plenty of info and personal experience. Traditional schooling is on the way out and for good reason. But you will rarely hear it from the school or anybody with kids in traditional public school settings .
Here is a link to free online public school. I saw in earlier posts you did not see the free link . I also saw the contemplation of tough love. I started that at age 2 and was done at age 5. Way past time for that approach . http://www.tennesseeonlinepublicschool.org/faq.html
I don't buy the smart kid thing. He is 15 and in 9th grade, so either red shirted or held back once already. He is failing Algebra I and another freshman class. I get that some smart kids sabotage themselves, but the whole thing doesn't add up to that from what the mom has posted.
I don't buy the smart kid thing. He is 15 and in 9th grade, so either red shirted or held back once already. He is failing Algebra I and another freshman class. I get that some smart kids sabotage themselves, but the whole thing doesn't add up to that from what the mom has posted.
No it doesn`t add up. That's why I am on here, asking for help.
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