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It's not about 'minding your own business' or letting kids die....the OP has no show that the baby was in any danger other then in her own mind.
Do none of you let kids go out and play? By the time my daughter was a year, she certainly could play at the playground without me following her around like a hawk. The only time she came and got me was if she wasn't pushed on the swing (she was still too little to do that on her own).
This isn't even in the same ballpark as locking kids in a hot car.
Define 'following her around like a hawk'. While I don't hover, I keep my children within eye-sight. I may be closer if the playground equipment has large gaps or transition areas that would allow my child to fall 6 or 8+ feet to the ground (which is usually a thin, worn-down layer of wood chips). I certainly don't turn my back and place more importance on a conversation. Thankfully, the OP's playground appears to be better than most.
I have a 9 month old, and at that age there is no way I would be careless enough to let him roam around on a public playground with that much distance between myself and him (especially seeing the photographs). How about using your time at the playground to bond with your kid and help them develop (muscle control, working on standing up/pulling up) instead of the kid just being some baggage you carry around that interrupts your conversations from time-to-time.
And yes, it is in the same ballpark as locking the kids in a car with the engine running while you are maybe within eye-sight, getting distracted by your boyfriend and his hormones.
Define 'following her around like a hawk'. While I don't hover, I keep my children within eye-sight. I may be closer if the playground equipment has large gaps or transition areas that would allow my child to fall 6 or 8+ feet to the ground (which is usually a thin, worn-down layer of wood chips). I certainly don't turn my back and place more importance on a conversation. Thankfully, the OP's playground appears to be better than most.
I have a 9 month old, and at that age there is no way I would be careless enough to let him roam around on a public playground with that much distance between myself and him (especially seeing the photographs). How about using your time at the playground to bond with your kid and help them develop (muscle control, working on standing up/pulling up) instead of the kid just being some baggage you carry around that interrupts your conversations from time-to-time.
And yes, it is in the same ballpark as locking the kids in a car with the engine running while you are maybe within eye-sight, getting distracted by your boyfriend and his hormones.
Kids develop muscle control and standing/pulling up best on their own.
You really aren't doing your infant/toddler any favors holding them up when they don't have the balance and control to do it themselves, lifting them onto equipment they can't get onto on their own, or assisting them down from it if they can't get down on their own.
Yep, I agree that bonding socially and emotionally is important at any time, including at the park, but it's utter malarkey that you're neglecting a child's development if you leave them to their own devices when they're happily and contentedly engaged in play without you, inside the home or out of it.
Ah, another one of these "Back in Europe, people do this. . . ". Most of these statements turn out to be urban legends, and untrue.
As far as 10 year old boys "grab(bing) a .22 caliber rifle and run about in the woods behind the house until sunset", I had a classmate who got killed doing so with a friend. Carseats and seatbelts prevent deaths. I don't understand anyone being opposed to them.
I agree with malamute. Standards change. Here is a good article about safety: Accidents Happen, but can be Minimized or Prevented - KidsGrowth
I will quote: "Perhaps the single most important thing parents can do is to stop accepting accidents as an inevitable part of childhood. While accidents will happen, childhood injuries can be prevented."
I should have been more clear about seatbelts and carseats, but rather than explain further please accept that I'm certainly not "opposing" anything of the sort.
I had a classmate who was killed eating strawberries. She was six. A friend from church a year older than me ruptured his liver riding his BMX-style bicycle in the alleyway behind his home and died. I think he was 12. A girl at my high school was killed in an accident when her car was struck by another driver who ran a red light. She had just turned 16. I'll bet you would still feed your kids strawberries, let them ride their bicycles and drive cars. This isn't really germane to the point I was originally trying to make, but by the numbers a child is far safer hunting with firearms than he or she is while riding in a car but people today aren't going to be as alarmed by the potential for car accidents as they are by a .22 rifle. Also, I'll bet that the kid that grew up in the woods with a .22 is a helluva lot safer with firearms as an adult than the one that bought a handgun in his/her twenties for fun and/or personal defense and took a three hour firearms safety class. Some things are simply better learned in youth. Personal responsibility is kinda one of them...
My intent was to point out that we've gone overboard with baby-proofing and supervision. It absolutely makes sense to do what you reasonably can to ensure that your children survive, but I simply do not agree that a child at the transition point from cruising to toddling is in imminent danger on the park depicted in the pictures upthread because his mother was 15 yards away, nor do I agree that any judgment can be made about the mother's fitness as a parent.
Kids develop muscle control and standing/pulling up best on their own.
You really aren't doing your infant/toddler any favors holding them up when they don't have the balance and control to do it themselves, lifting them onto equipment they can't get onto on their own, or assisting them down from it if they can't get down on their own.
Yep, I agree that bonding socially and emotionally is important at any time, including at the park, but it's utter malarkey that you're neglecting a child's development if you leave them to their own devices when they're happily and contentedly engaged in play without you, inside the home or out of it.
Yeah, because there are so many adults who can't walk or climb because their mommy held their hand at the playground instead of letting them just "figure it out" when they were a toddler...
Yep, it would be in your best interest if you listen to your husband. That is usually the best advice for all women to follow. Sorry, I couldn't resist. I think it is great when parents step back and let a tiny one explore a bit. They are sponges and I'll be that little baby will be smart.
Define 'following her around like a hawk'. While I don't hover, I keep my children within eye-sight. I may be closer if the playground equipment has large gaps or transition areas that would allow my child to fall 6 or 8+ feet to the ground (which is usually a thin, worn-down layer of wood chips). I certainly don't turn my back and place more importance on a conversation. Thankfully, the OP's playground appears to be better than most.
I have a 9 month old, and at that age there is no way I would be careless enough to let him roam around on a public playground with that much distance between myself and him (especially seeing the photographs). How about using your time at the playground to bond with your kid and help them develop (muscle control, working on standing up/pulling up) instead of the kid just being some baggage you carry around that interrupts your conversations from time-to-time.
And yes, it is in the same ballpark as locking the kids in a car with the engine running while you are maybe within eye-sight, getting distracted by your boyfriend and his hormones.
How about using the playground to let the the kid be a kid. If you (g3neral you) have to rely on playground time to bond with your child... you probably have bigger problems than this mother does letting her child play by themselves.
I should have been more clear about seatbelts and carseats, but rather than explain further please accept that I'm certainly not "opposing" anything of the sort.
I had a classmate who was killed eating strawberries. She was six. A friend from church a year older than me ruptured his liver riding his BMX-style bicycle in the alleyway behind his home and died. I think he was 12. A girl at my high school was killed in an accident when her car was struck by another driver who ran a red light. She had just turned 16. I'll bet you would still feed your kids strawberries, let them ride their bicycles and drive cars. This isn't really germane to the point I was originally trying to make, but by the numbers a child is far safer hunting with firearms than he or she is while riding in a car but people today aren't going to be as alarmed by the potential for car accidents as they are by a .22 rifle. Also, I'll bet that the kid that grew up in the woods with a .22 is a helluva lot safer with firearms as an adult than the one that bought a handgun in his/her twenties for fun and/or personal defense and took a three hour firearms safety class. Some things are simply better learned in youth. Personal responsibility is kinda one of them...
My intent was to point out that we've gone overboard with baby-proofing and supervision. It absolutely makes sense to do what you reasonably can to ensure that your children survive, but I simply do not agree that a child at the transition point from cruising to toddling is in imminent danger on the park depicted in the pictures upthread because his mother was 15 yards away, nor do I agree that any judgment can be made about the mother's fitness as a parent.
This is not a gun-control (or not) thread, so I'm not going to respond to that.
Sure, freak accidents happen, e.g. someone eating strawberries IF that is really what killed her. Was the kid killed in the BMX accident riding recklessly? Males are well known to have a higher accident rate than females b/c they take more chances. Car accidents happen, and you can't control someone else's actions, e.g. running a red light.
I have made no judgement as to that mother's fitness as a parent; I do think being that distance from an infant, with your back turned to him, and talking to a friend are not the best supervision for a child of that age.
Nope. Not according to Ohky0815. Didn't place any qualifiers about where it is okay to be more watchful vs minding your own business. And that's the problem with blanket statements like that. There are real implications, real consequences, in simply minding your own business. As another poster mentioned, we are a society. At some level or another, people need to be involved in each others' lives. It always has been that way, and anyone spouting the 'back in my day' rhetoric is falling victim to selective memory and nostalgia.
I'm sure 'minding your own business' worked just fine, regarding the Colorado mom who locked her kids in a heated vehicle on a cold day in 2012, so she could get it on with her boyfriend in a nearby vehicle. Well, until both kids died of hyperthermia within 90 minutes.
No man is an island ... nor should any family be, either.
Too bad I'm out of reputation creds I can spread around today
"Appeal to Tradition (Argumentum Ad Traditio): This line of thought asserts that a premise must be true because people have always believed it or done it."
Yeah, because there are so many adults who can't walk or climb because their mommy held their hand at the playground instead of letting them just "figure it out" when they were a toddler...
I never said or implied that. I said they learn best on their own and when they're developmentally ready and our help in such instances is unnecessary. There's ample evidence and increasing amounts of research that shows the restrictions on kids being allowed to play, and play freely and often is detrimental to their development, from motor skills and planning, vestibular development, core strength, risk assessment to mental health and well being.
How you interact with your child matters.e. Yes, a child will still learn to walk whether you help them or they do it on their own, because it is a natural developmental progression, but all of your 'helping' doesn't really do anything until they are actually developmentally ready to walk, just like a child cannot learn to one foot over another climb stairs until they have reached that developmental stage. No amount of 'helping' will change that.
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