Father's rights (daughters, 18 year old, biological father, dad)
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The fact that he did not want to have a child with the woman is IRRELEVANT when there is an actual child. For gods' sake it doesn't matter what he did or did not want to do! That's so childish in thinking it's not funny. The fact remains that there is now a child. That's it.
As this is a parenting forum I hope this discussion energizes parents in educating their kids about the importance of protecting themselves having casual sex, or any sex for that matter. There are so many options available to prevent all of this. I've no qualms about people having whatever sexual relations they want. But it's really important to make sure kids understand the absolute gravity of the consequences, not just for them but for the kid they may possibly make in the process.
It's completely 100% avoidable.
You are one of those "absitence only" types, aren't you?
So tell me, if say a girl were to have casual sex with lots of guys and gets pregnant but she doesn't want it and the guy does should she be forced to have it and pay child support for 18+ years?
You are one of those "absitence only" types, aren't you?
Ha! That's funny. No.
Quote:
Originally Posted by PeaceAndLove42
So tell me, if say a girl were to have casual sex with lots of guys and gets pregnant but she doesn't want it and the guy does should she be forced to have it and pay child support for 18+ years?
No.
Jeez you need to read my posts. Not only am I against forcing parenthood on anyone, I'm also not for forcing child support when the guy adamantly does not want the pregnancy and the mother goes ahead. I think at that point she's responsible for her decision. I think that's fair.
What I AM for, is people - ONCE THEY HAVE AN ACTUAL CHILD - realizing that they've now got a kid who didn't ask for any of their parent's problems and has a right to the two people that created it putting their wants aside and doing the best thing for the kid. The best thing is to come to an arrangement where you're both willingly involved to whatever extent agreed upon and that you care about and look after your child's well being. However that best works for your particular situation.
Pretending it never happened is not a reasonable adult option IMO.
So tell me, if say a girl were to have casual sex with lots of guys and gets pregnant but she doesn't want it and the guy does should she be forced to have it and pay child support for 18+ years?
If the law treated fathers and mothers equally, yes.
Jeez you need to read my posts. Not only am I against forcing parenthood on anyone, I'm also not for forcing child support when the guy adamantly does not want the pregnancy and the mother goes ahead. I think at that point she's responsible for her decision. I think that's fair.
What I AM for, is people - ONCE THEY HAVE AN ACTUAL CHILD - realizing that they've now got a kid who didn't ask for any of their parent's problems and has a right to the two people that created it putting their wants aside and doing the best thing for the kid. The best thing is to come to an arrangement where you're both willingly involved to whatever extent agreed upon and that you care about and look after your child's well being. However that best works for your particular situation.
Pretending it never happened is not a reasonable adult option IMO.
Makes sense. Outside of your sober post the only situation I can think of when parenthood is potentially forced on someone is for a rape victim (male or female). All the rest is about choices we make.
Hopes how is that equal? Given that the father is never going to actually have to carry a baby to term?
They're both being forced to become parents, and they're both forced to pay child support for a child they would not have had if they hadn't been forced to become parents.
I'm not advocating that women be forced to full term pregnancies. I am pointing out that men are not treated fairly by the current laws. I believe that is PeaceAndLove42's point in providing the exact opposite scenario. It's interesting people have different answers if it's a man or a woman.
Men shouldn't be forced to become parents if they don't want to and the women choses to have a baby. That's why I proposed that there be a pregnancy mediation. If a man doesn't want to have a child and a woman wants to have a baby on her own, she should acknowledge in court that she will be solely responsible for the baby before the baby is born. The forces the couple to have a dialog and to take into consideration their financial situation if the other prospective parent isn't in agreement. One should not trump the other simply due to gender.
Totally on-topic. Not agreeing with me doesn't make my comment off-topic. Women carry the other 50%. Deal with it.
You'll have to connect the dots for me. The subject Macie introduced is "father's rights", not "does Mattie want to be a grandparent". But, I will tell you what i do want: I want my sons to be present in the delivery room when somebody they have a committed relationship with gives birth to their biological child. It's an irreplaceable, life altering experience, and not one to blow off. I want them to look into the face of that baby, and make a vow that they will always be there, emotionally, physically and financially, regardless of what happens with the relationship between them and the mother. Any less than that would cause me to be disappointed in my sons. Fortunately, I doubt it would happen.
They're both being forced to become parents, and they're both forced to pay child support for a child they would not have had if they hadn't been forced to become parents.
I'm not advocating that women be forced to full term pregnancies. I am pointing out that men are not treated fairly by the current laws. I believe that is PeaceAndLove42's point in providing the exact opposite scenario. It's interesting people have different answers if it's a man or a woman.
Men shouldn't be forced to become parents if they don't want to and the women choses to have a baby. That's why I proposed that there be a pregnancy mediation. If a man doesn't want to have a child and a woman wants to have a baby on her own, she should acknowledge in court that she will be solely responsible for the baby before the baby is born. The forces the couple to have a dialog and to take into consideration their financial situation if the other prospective parent isn't in agreement. One should not trump the other simply due to gender.
In theory, I might agree with you. But again, you are introducing government intervention in a very private matter. I would prefer the dialog take place between the two people considering having sex without mandated interference.
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