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I can't reconcile these two posts. In the first, it appears you lament that a 4 yr old isn't being beaten over the incident, while in the 2nd you show a clearly better way that similar circumstances were handled.
My vote is for #2, which obviously made an impression since it is remembered years after the fact.
Note they were posted in order.
The first is what I imediately thought would have happened in my life. Lament? No, but kids need to learn some stricter disciline than what they do currently. I see the difference in how my siblings raised their kids. My sisters are rather strict whereas my brother is a pushover. My daughter was ruined by her mother as she raised her in a town far enough away flight was necessary. She was adopted by her husband and he is 'dad' now. Fine by me as I don't approve of 3 kids by different guys and no marriage. 28, unskilled, 3 kids and single. Zero discipline as reported to me by 'dad'.
The second was what happened to a good friend of mine later in life. The impression it left on me was how my dad was a no BS kind of guy and would have really gone off if I lit a fire in/near the house. Getting beat for being stupid was a reality kids faced in the 60s vs timeout in a corner or no computer time kids face today oh, the humanity!!. Ergo...I never played with fire. I built fireplace/campfires but that is it. My dad didn't take us to McDonald's; roasting marshmallows is a real stretch.
id show your child what happens to people caught in fires,,,
doesn't have to be real scary , but find some pics,, that will get the message across
I remember as kids, I was the youngest
and my older siblings were behind the house,, flicking matches,,,towards the house
I was trying to do it also, and burnt my finger,,,that was a great teacher.. I didn't do it again...
matches were everywhere back then,,,most people smoked
I had a friend....who got caught playing with matches, his father brought him to the local fire station, to see the trucks...
"while there" the dad asked the firemen, "did you have to put out any fires this week??
and the firemen responded with "three fires, all caused by kids playing with matches, two of the houses burned down, and the third fire, the dog died
id show your child what happens to people caught in fires,,,
doesn't have to be real scary , but find some pics,, that will get the message across
I remember as kids, I was the youngest
and my older siblings were behind the house,, flicking matches,,,towards the house
I was trying to do it also, and burnt my finger,,,that was a great teacher.. I didn't do it again...
matches were everywhere back then,,,most people smoked
I had a friend....who got caught playing with matches, his father brought him to the local fire station, to see the trucks...
"while there" the dad asked the firemen, "did you have to put out any fires this week??
and the firemen responded with "three fires, all caused by kids playing with matches, two of the houses burned down, and the third fire, the dog died
that kid never played with matches again..
Yep! You know....people want to protect their children from horrific stuff. Unfortunately, it is HORRIFIC "stuff" that happens, when fire is handled inappropriately, regardless of a person's age. I can't believe that some folks couldn't imagine showing thier children graphic images of what happens when people "play with fire" or are careless with fires. If it saves your child's life, it's damn well work the shock. If your child is affected enough by those images, that it causes that child to stop ANOTHER child from playing with fire...then, OMG, how can that be a bad thing!? It is not. It is using TRUTH to educate and protect someone from harm.
It is THAT plain and simple. Sometimes the truth isn't pretty, damn it...but it's what's necessary to save lives!
Yep! You know....people want to protect their children from horrific stuff. Unfortunately, it is HORRIFIC "stuff" that happens, when fire is handled inappropriately, regardless of a person's age. I can't believe that some folks couldn't imagine showing thier children graphic images of what happens when people "play with fire" or are careless with fires. If it saves your child's life, it's damn well work the shock. If your child is affected enough by those images, that it causes that child to stop ANOTHER child from playing with fire...then, OMG, how can that be a bad thing!? It is not. It is using TRUTH to educate and protect someone from harm.
It is THAT plain and simple. Sometimes the truth isn't pretty, damn it...but it's what's necessary to save lives!
I personally knew two children who were killed in house fires started by children. One was started by a five year old (they suspected) and he and several siblings were killed. The fire raced through their old house so quickly that although his parents were home they were unable to save their children who were upstairs in their bedrooms. The parents said that they had caught the five year old playing with matches a week or so earlier and they thought that he understood how dangerous it was.
The second situation was even sadder. The mother locked her three preschoolers in a bedroom "to keep them safe" while she went on a quick errand and one of them must have started the fire almost as soon as she left. All three children were killed by the smoke in the brief time that she was gone. The mom is now in prison.
In my large city we probably have at least one house fire a year where children are killed and many of them are caused by children playing with fire.
Last edited by germaine2626; 07-20-2014 at 01:07 PM..
NEVER use a match?? You are going to damage your child with that type of discipline..
My kids were intrigued by matches when they were young.. I taught them how to use them properly. Now they are young teens and I don't seem to have a problem with them using matches.. My son lit off every firework this year for the 4th. He did a great job. He was very careful.
EDUCATE, encourage safety.
why?
you are kidding?
good for you!
I raised 3 boys, no matches, NEVER EVER LIGHTING fireworks EVER under any stretch of the immagination.
they are all college graduates and dont seem to have any problems in life.....
too many accidents with kids playing with matches and firework......I dont go for it, at all.
I raised 3 boys, no matches, NEVER EVER LIGHTING fireworks EVER under any stretch of the immagination.
they are all college graduates and dont seem to have any problems in life.....
too many accidents with kids playing with matches and firework......I dont go for it, at all.
They sell punks along with fireworks so you only need a single match to light that.
What's wrong with fireworks? Scary? Only if you hold them or put one in your mouth when they blow up.
I lit my first firecracker at age 3. My dad was EOD in the Air Force and use to set off the 4th of July firework displays everywhere we lived. I worked in the fireworks stands he use to have in TX at 13. If anyone knew of ordinance he did. I threw long strands of them off my deck a few weeks ago. Black Cats.
Sparklers are boring unless you climb a microwave tower and drop them after lighting them. They are pretty cool when 100' up.
Yesterday morning, as I hopped out of the shower I smelled smoke. Ran downstairs (I had put on a show for her before stepping into the shower) and there she was in the middle of the living room with a lit fireplace match (the long kind of wooden matches) attempting to twirl it. There was a small stack of already burned matches on the coffee table.
I pretty much freaked out and so did she. I was so frightened by what could have happened that I was a bit hysterical and she seemed so frightened by my reaction that she sobbed pretty uncontrollably for a bit. After we both calmed down, I put two and two together.
So, we just got back from three weeks in Hawaii. While we were there, we saw fire twirlers nearly everyday on the beaches at night. My daughter was fascinated by them, and I didn't see the harm in letting her watch. Free entertainment and all that. She was actually very upset that he never picked her as the audience volunteer!
I'm a little perplexed as to what to do at this point - she just turned four. Obviously, some (alot!) of the blame is mine. I don't generally leave her unattended in the house, but my husband is still in Hawaii and I thought I could get a quick shower in. Our fireplace is gas - the matches were in a cabinet about five foot off the floor (she had to move a counter height stool from the kitchen to get to them). I didn't realize she even knew they were up there - I myself had totally forgotten about them.
I'm worried that she still doesn't get how dangerous fire can be and of course, she didn't understand why is isn't okay to play with fire when she watched people doing it everyday for weeks! Some of the fire twirlers we saw were kids (maybe 12 or so?)
My husband is still in Hawaii (working there for the summer) and we only flew home for a few days to take care of somethings - we fly back there next week and will be staying til mid August.
I am sure seeing the twirlers had something to do with what happened and I can imagine how frightened you were.
Our son and some friend started the hills behind our house on fire at about the same age. Well, the fire wasn't anything huge, just a few leaves but could have been. Part of the reason they did this, they all knew how nice the firemen were and they had suckers on the fire trucks, the other reason, kids are curious. Luckily they did no real damage. When the firemen came out they also talked to the kids about the dangers of fire. Maybe you could have a firemen talk to your daughter about the difference between what she was doing and what the twirlers were doing in Hawaii or maybe you could explain to her.
yes you can.
better to have a matchless home than a burnt home.
I would really have a stern talking with her and make sure this never ever happens again, and that she " gets the message" and if not, she will get the beating of a life time.
fire, sorry, no joke.
no joke is right, but it is better to teach than totally hide. Do you think taking all drugs out of a house or alcohol (a drug I know) will keep kids from trying them? What will prevent the little girl from going to a friends house and finding matches? Are you saying everyone should take all matches out of houses?
BTW, it is pretty hard to teach a bare 4 year old what a beating of a lifetime would mean. Especially if she lives in a home that does not use corporal punishment. Teaching her the dangers of fire is the only way to keep this from happening again. A talk with the neighborhood fire dept. is the answer in my opinion.
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oh, the humanity!!. Ergo...I never played with fire. I built fireplace/campfires but that is it. My dad didn't take us to McDonald's; roasting marshmallows is a real stretch. 
If it saves your child's life, it's damn well work the shock. If your child is affected enough by those images, that it causes that child to stop ANOTHER child from playing with fire...then, OMG, how can that be a bad thing!? 
It is not. It is using TRUTH to educate and protect someone from harm. 
