Whats your take on Underage pregnancy? Is it a sign or responsibility or irresponsibility? (support, single mom)
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Pregnant at 18 or 19 isn't underage (or 16 or 17 in many countries) but I do think its not the best time to have a child. But its not good to leave it too late either because the risks of birth defects rise and infertility issues.
I feel sorry for teenage girls that get pregnant, maybe they had crappy abstinence-only sex education, parents who wouldn't let (or strongly discouraged) them go on birth control or get an abortion, or maybe they didn't use the birth control properly or it failed. Even if they were just plain stupid I still feel sorry for them, and their baby.
That does not make it a best practice. 1% of women can get pregnant at age 40 with their own eggs. With another womans eggs the percent goes up to 6%. Whoopee. There are millions of very unhappy women who wasted their childbearing years getting ready to start a family. Now they have nothing. Not even the husbands that they hoped to have children with. They have gone off to find fertile partners.
[B]I also have high standards for what it means to "have" children. If (as a guy) you need another man's sperm or (as a woman) another woman's eggs... IMO... its not your child. That's just my opinion.[/b]
No, you certainly don't have "high standards". Parenting is far more about love than DNA.
You are on the right path. Having children changes everything about your life. You are either ready for that emotionally, financially, and mentally or you are not. Can they still get their educations and ultimately lead successful, happy lives? Absolutely. But there is no denying it will be an extremely difficult journey. As an adoptive parent it does make me sad to see friends with teenage kids having babies, and then still acting like teenagers. In those cases, the babies suffer.
You really need to clarify what's irresponsible vs just a lifestyle choice. To some people getting married at 18 and starting a family is completely normal, to others its crazy like I want to enjoy my youth, travel, get established.
I would say in smaller towns or more rural areas its more common to get married younger, maybe you get a job with family, on a farm, some type of steady job where you have it for life and can make a decent wage at a young age. SOmeone in a big city, it would be tougher.
I definately agree people should try to be established so they and their kids dont have to struggle but really to each his own.
A very high percentage of these children are being born to teens and the mother is on Medicaid. The more babies, the more money. It is simple math. I thought they were getting a handle on generational welfare but then we moved to a town where it appeared to be a career choice for many. It was so sad because most didn't have a clue or interest in the babies when the newness wore off.
Kansas does not remotely represent a typical population demographic for the age structure of the population. It ranks above the average in teen pregnancies, has a lower than average age of first marriage, and has one of the highest percentages of the total population under age 18 of any state in the country.
"Some people want kids young." Unfortunately, the girls are not married. And they don't want to marry the father because then they lose their government assistance because the combined income level is too high. You should see the address book of my children's elementary school... most of the names in it, the mom and dad have different last names. They aren't married and all are on programs.
I am sure this is now the norm in the majority of the country now. I don't think people want to be self sufficient anymore.
"Some people want kids young." Unfortunately, the girls are not married. And they don't want to marry the father because then they lose their government assistance because the combined income level is too high. You should see the address book of my children's elementary school... most of the names in it, the mom and dad have different last names. They aren't married and all are on programs.
I am sure this is now the norm in the majority of the country now. I don't think people want to be self sufficient anymore.
What a crock....most families getting assistance are on it for less than 5 years. The myth of the welfare queen is just that....a myth brought out by the right to cut be misfits that actually help our citizens.
"Some people want kids young." Unfortunately, the girls are not married. And they don't want to marry the father because then they lose their government assistance because the combined income level is too high. You should see the address book of my children's elementary school... most of the names in it, the mom and dad have different last names. They aren't married and all are on programs.
I am sure this is now the norm in the majority of the country now. I don't think people want to be self sufficient anymore.
And while the stereotype of the “welfare queen” is a woman who has more children to increase the benefits she gets from government programs, families who are enrolled look similar to those who aren’t. “Average family size was the same (3.7 persons), whether or not a family received assistance,” the report notes.
Funny. The guy is in better shape than you and me put together. I should be lucky to be in half as good condition when I am his age in 20 years.
Yeah, whatever. IMO becoming a parent at 75 is irresponsible. Your giving the OP crap because he wants to wait until he is out of school and more established arguing that women cant become parents at 75, 40, 35.
Quote:
I mean, if you are a woman who wants to donate your eggs so other women can use
them, the cut off is around 28. There is also this misconception that fertility
treatments were invented as an aid to older women. They are not. They were
invented as an aid to women of normal childbearing years! Age related
infertility has a very poor track record with respect to IVF and other methods.
It does work, but it is like single digit percents! Not that much better than
the odds of a 40 something conceiving on her own. Considering what it costs, it
definitely is not for everybody. That does not make it a best practice. 1% of women can get pregnant at age 40 with their own eggs. With another womans eggs the percent goes up to 6%. Whoopee. There are millions of very unhappy women who wasted their childbearing years getting ready to start a family. Now they have nothing. Not even the husbands that they hoped to have children with. They have gone off to find fertile partners. I also have high standards for what it means to "have" children. If (as a guy) you need another man's sperm or (as a woman) another woman's eggs... IMO... its not your child. That's just my opinion.
I must know a disproportional number of women who have had children at 40 (conceived on their own). You are assuming women that age will need a egg donor? Im not sure what the relevance of age of donor is.
Quote:
No. But its true. You know it is. How many 18 or 20 something men actually WANT
kids when they are still living at home with mom and dad? How many want kids
when they have just landed in a promising career? How many want kids as soon as
the big money starts rolling in? No, you always want to wait a little while to
see how much better it can get. Life usually intervenes. What...65% of
pregnancies are unplanned? That's a LOT of Americans that were waiting for
something but didn't have a say in exactly what.
I cant speak for all men and certainly don't presume to know when they want to become parents any more than I can for women. In my demographic it seems the majority of educated people marry and become parents in their mid to late 20's. I see more uneducated people having kids in their teens, most unmarried. I know several couples that had their first child in their late 30's and many people who have had children in their 40's.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
