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Our schedule looks like this:
M- Homeschool, Chores, Errands
T- Homeschool, Chores, Errands
W- Homeschool, Chores, Errands, Dr Appt, Brother visit
Th- Homeschool, Chores, Errands, Dr Appt, Brother Visit, Church
F- Homeschool, Chores, Errands, Dr Appt, Church
Sa- Chores, Church
Su- Church, brother visit.
We dont have a set "fun" day or schedule. If we feel like going to the park, we do. If we feel like going to the zoo or shopping, we do. Just not on Sundays.
What is a "brother visit?" A visit to the kids' brother or what?
More than anything else, kids need exercise to feel comfortable in their own skins. Load up the bikes and hit a bike path or trail. Go hiking. Play tennis with them. The reason all the neighborhood kids have a full schedule of athletics is that they need exercise like they need to breathe. Telling them to "go out and play" is child neglect. If you can't give your kids what they need, find another adult who can.
During the lean times, my father took us bunny counting in the evening. They made tents out of sheets and made us secret members of the belly button club. He removed the back of a soda bottle and attached them to each other through our shirts.
We did the same for our kids. Every weekend we did something fun.
Not stupid at all. My parents were very abusive and unstable so fun was not really part of life. Before kids I spoiled my dogs rotten. And then I found I spoiled my kids a bit too much. Done alot of therapy but I know I started this "what are we going to do fun todaY" with my kids because for the first 5 or so years of my life I took them to do something fun every day.
But too bad a kid doesn't think a ride in the car or doing errands is all that much fun
My parents weren't abusive or drug users, but we were lower middle class and didn't do fun things. I was mostly ignored as a child/teenage (and very ignored as an adult), so I do enjoy having that "fun time" as a family. We normally only eat out once a week, and we've explained to them that it's expensive and not healthy to eat out a lot. But they do basketball class, piano lessons and martial arts. We take them to the movies about every other month (I suffer through the kid movies, but they love it) and I recently took each kid out separately one evening for 1:1 time at Dave and Busters. In summer, we do a lot of day trips to the mountains (nothing expensive) or to the zoo or an amusement park where we get seasons passes.
Sometimes I sort of struggle with what's "normal", or where to draw the line on fun time since my parents were too far the other way and I ended up never bonding with them. We don't want to spoil them (I don't think they are), but still want that family bonding. Sometimes it's just sitting on the couch watching TV (we love America's Funniest Videos) or playing Uno, or taking a walk to a park. All free, but also bonding time. Sometimes I have to remind myself that it's ok to just let them play outside with friends and have completely unscheduled time to themselves.
More than anything else, kids need exercise to feel comfortable in their own skins. Load up the bikes and hit a bike path or trail. Go hiking. Play tennis with them. The reason all the neighborhood kids have a full schedule of athletics is that they need exercise like they need to breathe. Telling them to "go out and play" is child neglect. If you can't give your kids what they need, find another adult who can.
ummm a) thats a wee bit hard core. b)if you read my post, then get 90 minutes a weekday of free play on a playground with their friends c) they get 45 minutes of recess a day d) going out to play is great for kids, we just don't live in an area its common to see e) I don't tell them to go outside...ever. But sometimes they like to.
Dude, if every mom who wanted a down day on the weekend gave up their kids for adoption...well we would be in a mess. Thinkin' you don't have kids
More than anything else, kids need exercise to feel comfortable in their own skins. Load up the bikes and hit a bike path or trail. Go hiking. Play tennis with them. The reason all the neighborhood kids have a full schedule of athletics is that they need exercise like they need to breathe. Telling them to "go out and play" is child neglect. If you can't give your kids what they need, find another adult who can.
I was with you up until the bolded. Why do kids need parents around to get exercise? Assuming the area is safe, they can get all kinds of physical activity without being supervised by adults. Riding bikes, playing tag, hopscotch, hide and seek, all manner of ball games....
My parents weren't abusive or drug users, but we were lower middle class and didn't do fun things. I was mostly ignored as a child/teenage (and very ignored as an adult), so I do enjoy having that "fun time" as a family. We normally only eat out once a week, and we've explained to them that it's expensive and not healthy to eat out a lot. But they do basketball class, piano lessons and martial arts. We take them to the movies about every other month (I suffer through the kid movies, but they love it) and I recently took each kid out separately one evening for 1:1 time at Dave and Busters. In summer, we do a lot of day trips to the mountains (nothing expensive) or to the zoo or an amusement park where we get seasons passes.
Sometimes I sort of struggle with what's "normal", or where to draw the line on fun time since my parents were too far the other way and I ended up never bonding with them. We don't want to spoil them (I don't think they are), but still want that family bonding. Sometimes it's just sitting on the couch watching TV (we love America's Funniest Videos) or playing Uno, or taking a walk to a park. All free, but also bonding time. Sometimes I have to remind myself that it's ok to just let them play outside with friends and have completely unscheduled time to themselves.
I totally relate to this. I think where I am struggling is they don't seem to count doing something like playing games, watching movies together (unless its at a theater), *just* eating out, the book store, going for a walk to the park, any type of errands, etc as "something fun". I think having funds, living in a city and I used to get cabin fever by 9am, I went too far the spoiling route. I think with our move coming up, to a much different city, it will be easier to reign it in some and maybe work in some more free activities. We have daily bonding time (we do lots of talking in the car, cuddle time in the morning, tickles and games, watch tv together in my bed, etc). But to them, if it isn't something super exciting, it isn't "something fun".
I had a tradition where I would take my son out to breakfast every Friday morning. McDonald's, Denny's, Dunkin Donuts etc
This was our time for one-on-one to talk and joke around. It was a great way to start our Friday and breakfast is cheaper than dinner.
I think traditions are important because that is what they remember.
I really like this response. If there was one thing I could name I missed in growing up it was this: one-on-one time with parents. I had very few instances and I swear I remember each one vividly. I spent more personal time with my maternal grandparents. I lived within walking distance of their house and I often walked over there when I wanted some attention. I always felt welcome. My grandmother did her shopping in a once-a-week, all-afternoon marathon and she often took me with her. Sometimes that expanded to all day, which would include lunch out. That was where I learned proper restaurant behavior. Those shopping trips were a special time in which we bonded.
My grandfather also acted like he really enjoyed time with me, although our interactions mostly consisted of us sitting on the porch talking or watching TV together. He had a great sense of humor and he would tell me funny stories about our family members or things that happened to him at work.
Other than when my father worked shifts and was unavailable, my family always had dinner together every night. That was when we kids talked to our parents about school, friends, and activities. I realize that today's economy often doesn't permit parents to dine nightly with their children, which I believe is something valuable that has been lost.
So, parents, take Booklove21's suggestion: make some one-on-one dates with your kids. That can be much more memorable to them than big extravaganzas of expensive activities. One of my brothers always took his oldest daughter out to breakfast every Saturday morning and to this day (she is 30) they are very close. He had some special times set up with his other kids, too ... things that they enjoyed specifically.
I firmly believe that no matter what they say, it's undivided attention from significant adults kids want more than entertainment from strangers.
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