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My kid is 4, she hasn't mentioned god yet but I'm expecting her to soon as she's started spending every other weekend with her dad at his parents house and they are extremely religious.
I don't let her attend holy classes at daycare, won't let her at school either. I prefer for her to learn about different religions in a cultural context instead, and I'll also read the bible with her (because so many films, books etc. reference the bible so without reading it she won't get the references. For instance Life of Brian is a lot more funny when you know the gospels well). I studied the bible for several years so I think I'll be able to give her a good education in it. Maybe we'll read other religious texts too out of interest. But I will be telling her that I don't believe any religion is true but its important to be respectful of other people, and that includes not mocking their beliefs, and to keep her opinions of religion to herself unless she is asked to give her opinion.
If she becomes religious I'll be sad but her beliefs are hers so I will be respectful and support her if she wants.
You think that it's logical and the reality for there to be no god, but I (and billions of others) think it's logical and the reality that there is a god(s). Not everything has to have tangible evidence, and referring to God as an imaginary friend is really low. You can teach your children to be atheists all you want, but please do so without denigrating others.
Well, that's the difference between us then....for me, evidence is important and I'll teach my children its value.
FWIW, I'm a product of 12 years of parochial school.
Those of a religious bent see anyone who doesn't accept or support their views as hostile. I'm not hostile but neither am I accommodating about the whole business. I am tolerant, and those who disagree need to learn the real meaning of that word. But I certainly want my child to approach life with reason and logic firmly ensconced in her thought processes and not be led by fanciful hopes and irrational fears.
As for using terms like "Sky-friends", "incantations", and similar terms, that's just rude, rather childish, and highly self-righteous.
incantation
noun
1. the chanting or uttering of words purporting to have magical power.
2. the formula employed; a spell or charm.
3. magical ceremonies.
4. magic; sorcery.
5. repetitious wordiness used to conceal a lack of content; obfuscation:
Hmmm... Numbers 1, 2 and 3 seem pretty accurate when used to describe many religious practices.
Last edited by Workin_Hard; 03-24-2015 at 06:41 AM..
How old was your child when he/she first brought up the idea of a "god"? (or maybe you did first?)
What questions did they ask and how did you respond?
ps. if you want to debate why your particular religion/"god" is the best one, please do so in the correct forum. The intention of this post is to see how the good parents on this forum specifically responded to their curious and developing children.
I have not had any questions as such yet. My daugther is 4.5 now and last Christmas she came home from her Kindergarten full of the stories of the birth of Jesus and all that. She even play acted what she had learned out with toys which I did with her too. And she made her own blue head dress at one point pretending she was Mary with a doll for the Baby. I had to play the part of all three wise men. All very complicated.
At the end of it I merely said to her "That was a nice story wasn't it? Now lets go read some other stories" and we went to the sofa to read some Rohld Dahl.
So I think it is firmly placed in her mind that these are all stories - all make believe - and she has them sufficiently categorised in the same place in her mind. Time will tell. She recently reffered to a statue of the Virgin Mary as "One of the ladies in those stories". Was surprised she had not connected the statue with the Mary character.
So all good so far. Some of her other questions are not so easy to explain the answer to - even when I understand them myself. Her most recent one being "Daddy if the moon is so heavy - why does it not fall down on us?" - so I had to sit down with some balloons and marbles and explain the concept of how the moon actually is falling on us - all the time - but its angular movement is fast enough that the ground is falling away from it - just as fast as it is falling towards the ground.
She seemed to get it too - and when the recent solar eclipse happened she seemed to have some good grasp on what was happening and why.
While I may not know, I can say with complete conviction that the afterlife does not involve Pearly Gates, wings, harps, firey pits, pitchforks, cloven hooves, etc. or judgment by a deity dreamed up by desert wanderers 3000+ years ago whom we certainly have not heard from since (- the deity, not the nomads).
And you see the ability to discern fools and not be taken in by charlatans as a burden?
She can analyze for herself beginning with a clear mind, not one polluted by fairy tales and blind faith. Teaching critical thinking is a far better gift to your child than blind faith based on superstition. Look at the facts.
Wow, the hatred from believers is strong when delusions are challenged. Praying for my eternal damnation yet? As I stated, I teach my child ways to recognize others for what they are and how get along with them in non-disruptive ways.
I told you I was not a believer so why do you have to change my words and make a personal attack to refute my OPINION?
You completely ignored my POINT, that you are placing a burden on that child to always have it in her mind that so many people she comes in contact with are just idiots. AND dangerous!
How are you telling a baby that while everyone seems perfectly nice in her school, BEWARE! They're going to try and brainwash you!
The logical and kind thing to do is to is to inform her about everyone's beliefs without demeaning them. It has nothing to do with pitchforks and cloven hooves. And IF she ever heard anything about pearly gates it would be much more AGE APPROPRIATE to explain it as a dream or something. Or "some people like to believe that there are playgrounds in the sky".
SEE? All about positive and negative. Just like when the kid watches cartoons.
Sorry, but teaching a child to "get along in non disruptive ways" is NOT the way I raised my kid. I wanted him to see the best in people regardless of differences. NOT that everyone was a political or intellectual enemy. And brainwashing him that a large chunk of the world is stupid would have placed a terrible negative CONFUSING burden on that young mind.
The EASY answer at a child's level of comprehension is the CORRECT answer.
If the kid says "Daddy, my friend told me it's Jesus' birthday" it's much NICER to say "Oh that's nice. But we don't know him or celebrate that birthday" instead of "OMG OMG DO NOT LET THAT IDIOT BRAINWASH AND INFLUENCE YOU!!"
Frankly it makes you look a little fearful, imo. As a dog walker I can guarantee you dogs don't lie they tell you all about their owners... and they know INSTINCTIVELY if a person is anxious, nervous and not a calm leader. Just like kids, actually.
But it's ok. She can discuss it with her shrink later on.
I have not had any questions as such yet. My daugther is 4.5 now and last Christmas she came home from her Kindergarten full of the stories of the birth of Jesus and all that. She even play acted what she had learned out with toys which I did with her too. And she made her own blue head dress at one point pretending she was Mary with a doll for the Baby. I had to play the part of all three wise men. All very complicated.
At the end of it I merely said to her "That was a nice story wasn't it? Now lets go read some other stories" and we went to the sofa to read some Rohld Dahl.
So I think it is firmly placed in her mind that these are all stories - all make believe - and she has them sufficiently categorised in the same place in her mind. Time will tell. She recently reffered to a statue of the Virgin Mary as "One of the ladies in those stories". Was surprised she had not connected the statue with the Mary character.
So all good so far. Some of her other questions are not so easy to explain the answer to - even when I understand them myself. Her most recent one being "Daddy if the moon is so heavy - why does it not fall down on us?" - so I had to sit down with some balloons and marbles and explain the concept of how the moon actually is falling on us - all the time - but its angular movement is fast enough that the ground is falling away from it - just as fast as it is falling towards the ground.
She seemed to get it too - and when the recent solar eclipse happened she seemed to have some good grasp on what was happening and why.
EXACTLY.
That's what I did, too. No reason to impart to her that half the world are dangerous idiots like I'm hearing from others.
And while our schools never mentioned that particular aspect of Christmas, I had a much tougher time building a pulley and lever system in 5th grade when the teacher couldn't be bothered and assigned it as homework.
EXACTLY. That's what I did, too. No reason to impart to her that half the world are dangerous idiots like I'm hearing from others.
I guess it must be powerfully subjective. Because I am not really seeing the hate or misrepresentation in the posts on the thread that others are reacting to. And where I am seeing some of it - it does not seem as extreme to me as it seems to others.
Meanwhile there are people I have met in my life who would react to my post the opposite to how you did and would think that the idea of supplanting the notion that it was "just a story" in the head of the child is horrifically hateful and evil and indicative of one of the worst parenting decisions I could possibly be making.
I guess the only thing that seems to outnumber the opinions people have on this particular issue - is the number of reactions people maintain to the opinions OTHER people have on this issue
The rancor towards people of faith displayed in this thread is appalling. If you want to have your own anti-religious mutual masturbation session, please head for the Atheism forum.
Please don't. No proselytizing in that forum. They can go to the general religion forum though.
What's bad is describing it to your kids as people who have fantasies or make stuff up because they're scared. Calling God "sky daddy" or the "invisible dad in the sky" is extremely condescending, and parents shouldn't describe religious people that way. I didn't tell my niece that atheists are crazy people who don't believe in God. I simply told her that some people believe the way we do, some people believe in a different god, some in multiple gods, and some in no god.
You didn't, but an awful lot of religious people do tell their kids that atheists are horrible people and can't be trusted.
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