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A child in a retail store has an outburst because his parents will not buy an item because it is neither in their budget nor needed. The parents take no action as the outburst grows worse for 20 minutes. They finally take their son out of the store. He breaks free and re-enters the store four times keeping up the outburst.
If a child's outburst escalates, he should have a stern warning from a parent. If he refuses to obey and continues with his outburst, the parent should exit the store with the child and resolve the outburst.
Parents should not ignore their child's outburst for twenty minutes. They may be content with it, but others are not. Not controlling the outburst is weak parenting.
Dear ( probably childless) parenting expert,
You either have too much time on your hands or too few groceries to buy.
Next time try minding your own business... it does wonders for your sanity.
The "mind your own business" credo gets very old. My business involves my personal comfort level. When your child's behavior interferes with my personal comfort level, it becomes my business.
That said, I have a pretty decent tolerance for kids making noise, when I'm in a store and I'm only there to shop and leave.
However if I am the cashier, and I can't just walk away from it, and your child is running in the aisles, pulling things off the shelves, or having a temper tantrum in line, or puking in the shopping cart (that actually happened ONCE - it's not a regular thing, thankfully), then I certainly feel entitled to be annoyed by your child. Especially since I'm not -allowed- to say something about it.
I do, however, say something when it's winter and some kid insists on playing with the automatic exit door while Mommy waits in line. I say it to the parent - "Erm, ma'am your child is going to get hurt if someone tries to leave while he's on the other side of that door. Might want to keep him closer."
If I see the kid pulling the chain off the stair-ladder on wheels (the chain with the sign that says EMPLOYEES ONLY), I'll act first and apologize later. Although it's not my job to keep children out of dangerous situations, I WILL step in if mom can't manage to do it herself. I'll leave disciplining up to the parent but I will reach for that child's arm (to touch it, not to grab it), and very sternly tell that child that he is not allowed to climb the ladder.
The "mind your own business" credo gets very old. My business involves my personal comfort level. When your child's behavior interferes with my personal comfort level, it becomes my business.
That said, I have a pretty decent tolerance for kids making noise, when I'm in a store and I'm only there to shop and leave.
However if I am the cashier, and I can't just walk away from it, and your child is running in the aisles, pulling things off the shelves, or having a temper tantrum in line, or puking in the shopping cart (that actually happened ONCE - it's not a regular thing, thankfully), then I certainly feel entitled to be annoyed by your child. Especially since I'm not -allowed- to say something about it.
I do, however, say something when it's winter and some kid insists on playing with the automatic exit door while Mommy waits in line. I say it to the parent - "Erm, ma'am your child is going to get hurt if someone tries to leave while he's on the other side of that door. Might want to keep him closer."
If I see the kid pulling the chain off the stair-ladder on wheels (the chain with the sign that says EMPLOYEES ONLY), I'll act first and apologize later. Although it's not my job to keep children out of dangerous situations, I WILL step in if mom can't manage to do it herself. I'll leave disciplining up to the parent but I will reach for that child's arm (to touch it, not to grab it), and very sternly tell that child that he is not allowed to climb the ladder.
You got annoyed with a CHILD for vomiting? That's cold.
I get annoyed with the parent for bringing a sick child into the store. My annoyance is always with the parent, not the child. Children will be children. My annoyance is also with the fact that someone (which would likely be me) has to stop business to clean out that shopping cart when mom and puking child leaves.
If you think that's not annoying, or that you'd enjoy doing that, give me your address. I'll send all the sick kids to your house while their parents enjoy a puke-free day in the store
Yes, this sounds like poor parenting. But the story sounds rather unlikely - the child 'broke free' to reenter the store on his own four times?
Anyway...
When I'm at, say, Target, my goal is to secure the items I need and pay for them and depart as soon as possible. So it some kid is throwing a fit, I don't really care. It's a retail store, not a restaurant where I go for the atmosphere and the experience.
So, yes, the poor parenting in that situation is (and clearly has been) going on. But that's more of an issue for the parents and the child. Me? Like I said, I'm grabbing socks and paper towels and shaving cream and I'm out of there. A tantrum? Whatever.
Last edited by Unsettomati; 05-31-2015 at 04:23 PM..
I get annoyed with the parent for bringing a sick child into the store. My annoyance is always with the parent, not the child. Children will be children. My annoyance is also with the fact that someone (which would likely be me) has to stop business to clean out that shopping cart when mom and puking child leaves.
If you think that's not annoying, or that you'd enjoy doing that, give me your address. I'll send all the sick kids to your house while their parents enjoy a puke-free day in the store
Sometimes you can't predict your kid is going to blow chunks. It does seem to come from no where. My son used to get migraine headaches (saddest thing ever) and they would come from no where. One minute he would be find the next his eyes would be blood shot and 3 seconds later he would start throwing up. Happened in public several times. It was terrible.
My daughter used to get sudden nose bleeds.
I guess I should have just kept them locked in a dark basement.
OMG and I forgot the story where we were on vacation. My daughter seemed a little more tired then usual but wasn't complaining much. We went into a restaurant and out of the blue my daughter had diarrhea on herself (she was 2 and out of diapers). I spent an hour in the bathroom cleaning her up. I made a b-line for an employee to let them know the bathroom had to be disinfected (as I had to use the sink to wash her and her clothes) before we rushed out. And right as I am telling him she throws up right in the middle of the restaurant! All I could say, as I ran for the exit was "Oh my god, I am so sorry!!" I actually got looks of pity not outrage as far as I could tell.
Sometimes you can't predict your kid is going to blow chunks. It does seem to come from no where. My son used to get migraine headaches (saddest thing ever) and they would come from no where. One minute he would be find the next his eyes would be blood shot and 3 seconds later he would start throwing up. Happened in public several times. It was terrible.
My daughter used to get sudden nose bleeds.
I guess I should have just kept them locked in a dark basement.
I didn't know that anyone said anything about a dark basement. Unless your home is in a dark basement?
Everyone keeps saying "if your kid can't behave in public, stay home!" And I keep asking, "how are kids supposed to learn how to behave in they aren't allowed in public?" None of you smarty pants seem to have an answer for me.
Kids don't have to learn to behave in public. What they need is to learn manners and they can learn those at home.
Do I have kids? No. But what I did have was a dog I could take out in public anywhere at any time to places he was allowed to go, and I never had a problem. I brought him to the bank one day and waited in line. The dog sat beside me by my left side as he had been taught. When I had to move forward, the dog got up, moved forward with me, and sat down again when I stopped. There were a lot of comments made that day about the dog who was behaving himself in public and the the two kids who were running back and forth through the bank.
Is a kid easier to train than a dog? Probably not. But the basics are the same, i.e., tell them one time only, follow through, etc.
I still remember the mother who came into our bank with her five kids. She got up to the teller winodw and told all five kids to line up against the wall with their hands on it, and they did. She must have seen my expression, because she said, "What I need to do here will only take a minute, but no child of mine will go missing on my watch." This was the time when Polly Klaas had just been taken.
But my point is, this mother didn't have to fight with her kids when they were out in public to do this. They had to know ahead of time this is what they might have to do, so it was learned at home and when they needed to do it, there wasn't an argument.
And I have to bring up one more thing, mainly because I'm curious. For people with small children, I think the next biggest problem besides a temper tantrum is running around out of control. I know they make little harnesses and leashes for kids and I'd use that in a heartbeat if I had a small child. But while some mothers also seem to like using them, they won't because so many other mothers like to shame them for it. What's up with that? If it keeps your child safe and close by, who cares?
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