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Old 09-07-2015, 09:34 PM
 
Location: Denver 'burbs
23,517 posts, read 25,129,684 times
Reputation: 40239

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Quote:
Originally Posted by cindersslipper View Post
I think that parents need to be aware of the LEGAL CONSEQUENCES of what their child does while they are out doing *whatever*.

At 18 a child is Legally an Adult.

At 16 they are not.

Im sorry if you cant see the difference.

Going by your standards we are all A-OK to leave 14 year olds alone too - still illegal, but only 2 years off 16!!

So then what of 12 year olds, the sensible ones?

Leave them also?

I know a lot of 10 year olds far more responsible than their own parents - so them too?

Do you see where I'm going with this?

The LAW is there to clearly define what a Child is, for parents who think kids are just fine alone.

They are not....as OP has told us...!
Quote:
Originally Posted by cindersslipper View Post
If you're talking to me, I never said that.

Someone else said I said it.

Not quite the same thing.
So please clarify what you meant by "STILL illegal"
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Old 09-07-2015, 09:43 PM
 
5,413 posts, read 5,696,586 times
Reputation: 9351
Quote:
Originally Posted by maciesmom View Post
So please clarify what you meant by "STILL illegal"
Because leaving a 14 year old alone for periods of time is not illegal either.....not even in Australia from what i can see.

The most I found that in one province, Queensland, if you leave a child 12 or under for an unreasonable time you are guilty of a misdemeanor....that's it.

Parents can be held responsible to provide proper housing food and clothing until either age 16 or 18...but that isn't the issue here at all.
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Old 09-07-2015, 10:30 PM
 
Location: Kalamalka Lake, B.C.
3,205 posts, read 4,444,799 times
Reputation: 4214
Dear old dad said to me, when I was 12: "If I haven't instilled some sense of responsibility in you by now, and I've had more than your first decade in life to do it, I'm probably not going to succeed in future years." Good luck.
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Old 09-08-2015, 12:55 AM
 
Location: Finland
6,400 posts, read 6,192,483 times
Reputation: 10352
Quote:
Originally Posted by cindersslipper View Post
16 is LEGALLY A CHILD PEOPLE.

I don't know what your local CPS would have to say about leaving him alone overnight, but I can assure you, it wont be good.

You can leave your child alone once they're 18, not a problem!

But 16 years old is STILL A CHILD in every way except their bodies.

A mere 13 months earlier they were 14 years old>>14 summers to learn how to behave if your friends become rowdy when the parents are away for the night, how to not be scared if something crashes outside at 3am, how to cope if one of the animals has a sudden fit, the pipes burst, a stranger begins calling the house to frighten you...

The possibilities of DISASTER are endless, and being legally a child, OP is entirely responsible for it.

Much, much easier, and some would say KINDER, to stay in at night with your CHILD.
In the UK 16 year olds can legally move out of their parents home and live alone. Where I live now it is not uncommon for 16 year olds to move to another city without their parents to attend high school. And I am fairly confident that in no country would CPS have an issue with an average 16 year old being left home alone overnight.
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Old 09-08-2015, 09:13 AM
 
16,719 posts, read 16,455,351 times
Reputation: 41310
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hummingbyrd View Post
What would you guys do? It's not the end of the world that they were here but it's extremely disappointing the way he handled himself.
It's obvious you have trust issues with this kid and yet you're mad at him for being that way while you are out, overnight, doing who knows what?

Sorry, but I don't have much sympathy. You're a parent and you should be at home with your kid. We had to do it until they were 18 and out of the house because they couldn't be trusted to behave alone.
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Old 09-08-2015, 09:23 AM
 
16,719 posts, read 16,455,351 times
Reputation: 41310
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hummingbyrd View Post
I don't appreciate the overnight stress he inflicted
Let's be honest here. If you had stayed home and not left to go somewhere overnight, there wouldn't have been any stress in the first place. So this is all on you.

Do not blame your son for being a teenager while you are out acting like one.
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Old 09-08-2015, 10:35 AM
 
2,779 posts, read 4,961,702 times
Reputation: 5044
I thought of this thread this morning when I saw an interview with a 16yr old Syrian refugee who had made it alone across thousands of miles to Germany after his entire family was killed. I'm guessing he could probably handle a night of Taco Bell and XBox with friends.
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Old 09-08-2015, 11:08 AM
 
2,441 posts, read 2,169,233 times
Reputation: 4644
Quote:
Originally Posted by HighFlyingBird View Post
I think...there is some major trust issues going on...on your part. What terrible things has he done in the past that has you spying on him 24/4 and harassing him through the night? Then going through the trash?
+1

Unless this kid has had some serious issues with drugs or violence or stealing or aomething in the past then they need to be allowed to demonstrate responsibility.
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Old 09-08-2015, 11:22 AM
 
14,323 posts, read 11,286,580 times
Reputation: 17797
Quote:
Originally Posted by cindersslipper View Post

BUT THEY ARE NOT LITTLE ADULTS. Put your average 16 year old in some sort of emergency situation, and they will revert to toddler status immediately, because THEIR BRAINS ARENT GROWN. They will cry, panic, and look around for the nearest adult to Take Charge.
This is nuts. My 11 year old can handle an emergency without breaking into tears and throwing a tantrum.

"Not grown" is not a toggle switch. Don't DONE growing perhaps. But man, a 16b crying like a baby? No.
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Old 09-08-2015, 11:31 AM
 
Location: Seattle, Washington
8,435 posts, read 9,217,737 times
Reputation: 1709
Quote:
Originally Posted by cindersslipper View Post
I think that parents need to be aware of the LEGAL CONSEQUENCES of what their child does while they are out doing *whatever*.

At 18 a child is Legally an Adult.

At 16 they are not.

Im sorry if you cant see the difference.

Going by your standards we are all A-OK to leave 14 year olds alone too - still illegal, but only 2 years off 16!!

So then what of 12 year olds, the sensible ones?

Leave them also?

I know a lot of 10 year olds far more responsible than their own parents - so them too?

Do you see where I'm going with this?

The LAW is there to clearly define what a Child is, for parents who think kids are just fine alone.

They are not....as OP has told us...!
Most CPS workers would actually disregard a report of leaving a 16 year old overnight. Guidelines state that 16-17 year olds can be left alone overnight for up to two consecutive nights without issue. However, depending on the maturity level of said child, it can be acceptable to be more than that. I don't know why you are so hell bent on thinking about this as a violation of the law.
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