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BTW, we never allowed our children to have locks on their bedroom doors. We respected their privacy and always knocked and asked permission before we went inside, but we the parents own the house (or pay the rent) so every room in the house belongs to us.
A locked door can make it very tempting for a child to use drugs or drink or cut or do other things that need a large amount of privacy.
What privacy did a 7 year old child need that you allowed her to lock herself in her room for hours?
I'm the mother of a 13 year old daughter she always locks herself in her room she's always done this since she was 7 she doesn't go out, she goes to school gets all A's then goes straight to her room, and when she does come out she's distant and detached when I ask her about it she says she's fine, but before when she was about 11 she went up to me and said she couldn't do it anymore and broke down crying I just thought she was just having a bad day but still I said don't be so dramatic. She just got up and went to her room, she pretended it didn't happen but doesn't come out as much. Her older sister is really into drugs and a few weeks ago when she was at school she stole her xbox when no one was home and when she found out her sister who's 24 came in my 13 year old lost it she didn't say anything but lept on her and tried to strangle her, she just kept screaming I hate you, she was shaking violently but suddenly got up and went up to her room and refused to talk since she rarely eats or leaves her room, I don't know what to do anymore I take her to a therapist but it doesn't help, what should I do?
BTW, we never allowed our children to have locks on their bedroom doors. We respected their privacy and always knocked and asked permission before we went inside, but we the parents own the house (or pay the rent) so every room in the house belongs to us.
A locked door can make it very tempting for a child to use drugs or drink or cut or do other things that need a large amount of privacy.
What privacy did a 7 year old child need that you allowed her to lock herself in her room for hours?
It may mean that the poster didn't mean there was a physical lock on the door....just that the child hides in her room all the time. Or if there is a lock....it could be keept her stuff safe from thieving older siblings.
Now that I think about it...our doors have had locks....but no one has ever used them.
There may or may not be something wrong with your child, but there is definitely something wrong with a parent that allows a child to isolate herself for years, allows a drug addicted child into the house, and is more concerned that something is wrong with the kids, rather than the parent.
Change your entry locks on your house. Meet the druggie off your property if you still want to maintain contact. YOU are enabling the druggie.
Take the bedroom door off your 13 year old's room if she locks it again.
YOU establish the rules in your home. There has never been any tough love in your home, but it may not be too late.
The 13 year old could be the most sane person in the household.
You don't have to take the bedroom door off to prevent her from locking it. You can turn the doorknob around so it can't be locked from the inside or just take the doorknob off completely. That way she can still close her door and have privacy, but she cannot lock you out.
Of course, we have also dealt with the locking doors with an autistic child and we can unlock the door with a small screwdriver as well.
Autistic or super depressed, or both. And if it does turn out that she is Autistic,[ or have questions about it] please do not be afraid. Daryl Hannah, Dan Akroyd, Steve Jobs, Bill Gates [ well, he keeps starting to open the closet but then slams it shut] Probably both Einstein and Tesla, Mother teresa and probably a few of our best artists, authors and presidents are/were Autistiic. Check out the Entire World theory and the new book out on neurodivergence. Please feel free to send a pm.
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