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What my mom did, and what we will do, encourage our daughters to get on implant-based birth control to avoid user error. Once I told my mom I was sexually active, she took me to see a OB/Gyn and supplied me with condoms. I was only sexually active with my then boyfriend at the time. We had open communication about sex, which I greatly appreciated and still appreciate. It wasn't taboo and there was no guilt, shame or whatever.
My then boyfriend's parents were pretty much the same way. They were very, very breezy. I stayed over at his house many occasions, vacationed with them for days to two weeks at a time. My mother knew we'd have sex whenever and wherever we could, and we did, and his parents knew and didn't care, either. They knew what we were doing and it was no big deal to them. They gave him condoms and all that jazz.
My son is 17 and recently started dating an older girl who has had sex before, while I suspect my son has not yet. I'm know it's gonna happen... I'm not a fool. I have told him no gf's in the house alone with him. I have bought him condoms and spoken to him many times about STD's and pregnancy. My big concern right now is that he is home alone a lot while I am at work. I am a single mother so dad is not around. Dad WAS around when his older brother was this age and so at that time I did not have to work. No sneaking girlfriend over in that house. With this guy though? I'm not real sure what to do honestly. I have been wondering how other parents handle this. Yes I know they can have sex anywhere and they will find a way, but what's to stop them from using the house as a motel room?
If they wanna do IT, they will do it, no matter if you agree or not. You are lucky your son held out for so long.
I was not allowed to bring my bf over to my parents house. Guess what? We had sex ANYWHERE BUT my parents house. In the car, in the bushes, at school, in parking lots, in forests, in abandoned buildings, EVERYWHERE, in dressing rooms in stores, bathrooms in stores, I snug out of the house late nights. I am still surprised we never got caught.
Is that what you want? Then go ahead with your plan.
If they wanna do IT, they will do it, no matter if you agree or not. You are lucky your son held out for so long.
I was not allowed to bring my bf over to my parents house. Guess what? We had sex ANYWHERE BUT my parents house. In the car, in the bushes, at school, in parking lots, in forests, in abandoned buildings, EVERYWHERE, in dressing rooms in stores, bathrooms in stores, I snug out of the house late nights. I am still surprised we never got caught.
Is that what you want? Then go ahead with your plan.
LOL oh the memories. Yeah if there is a will there is a way...and boy was there a will!
For one thing, please learn how to use apostrophes.
For another, I know it hurts, but you're going to have to let your kid go. Arm him with knowledge and resources to keep himself safe, and let him go. He can be out on his own in a year or less, and you won't be able to do anything then. There is really no point in trying to "stop him" now. Just try to teach him to make good choices, and hope for the best.
Lots of good advice. Depending on how long they have been together, you might want to bend on the rule about having her over. If she is 18 and a good girl (not going to get drunk or stoned)...and they are willing to use protection (maybe even double up with control and condoms at least until they have both been STD screened), maybe allow her to be over for periods of time. Unless there is a reason, besides sex, that you don't want her there.
He is at a very normal age to start having sex...its hard, I know. I think the more open you are, and the more you treat him with respect as someone old enough to make this decision, the less likely they will make a baby-mistake.
Their relationship is new. I understand that sex normal and even though it's a little weird to wrap my mind around because he's my baby, I do accept it. There is no other reason that I wouldn't want her there. She is a sweet girl and from what I've heard from those who know them, comes from a good family. I haven't met either parent yet but plan to now that they are an item. My biggest concern truly is them being safe. I am presently debating if her being there alone with him perhaps isn't something I should be deadset against...
Their relationship is new. I understand that sex normal and even though it's a little weird to wrap my mind around because he's my baby, I do accept it. There is no other reason that I wouldn't want her there. She is a sweet girl and from what I've heard from those who know them, comes from a good family. I haven't met either parent yet but plan to now that they are an item. My biggest concern truly is them being safe. I am presently debating if her being there alone with him perhaps isn't something I should be deadset against...
Spend some time to get to know her since it is new. Treat your baby (I totally get that!) like a young man. Talk openly about birth control and STD protection. Loosen up when he shows he understands the need for protecting his health and against pregnancy. Be his advocate. I know it is so hard, but you can do it!
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