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First unwanted touch = say NO and tell an adult
Second time = tell an adult again
Third time = beat the sh*t out of them
I see no issue with this.
The castrated crap heads running schools these days are not going to teach my kid that people can physically violate you with no consequences.
These steps were very close to what my martial arts instructor always told us. The difference was that on step two, he said to make sure we tell the adult that we know how to defend ourselves and would if it happened again.
They can't necessarily punish the boy if no witnesses come forth saying that he did indeed touch her, as there would be no evidence of it happening. Also, one punch would have more than sufficed, and the second one was unnecessary.
While schools are not able to disclose the punishments for other kids zero let the school know that you will not tolerate an unsafe environment where harassing and grabbing butts is acceptable. Look up the sexual battery laws in your state to see if there is a potential violation and reference it.
Once this conversation happens and is documented let your daughter know that she shouldn't respond with violence again unless it is an extreme last result. A framework should be in place where subsequent events will get their attention.
As for this one could she have handled it differently? Sure. Does it suck to eat a suspension? Sure. However, some rules are with breaking and some consequences worth paying.
The learning potential for all involved can be worth it and just a suspension really isn't that punitive.
Your daughter defended herself against a low life creep. Apparently his parents failed the "respect women" talk.
A similar thing happened to my 12 year old. No physical contact but verbal harassment.
He was taunting her in front of others on school property. Making fun of her because she is good friends with a boy who has some social issues.
Telling her she swallows, making hand gestures...etc..
She told him to shut up. Walked away.
He came up behind her pushed her and repeated the actions, my daughter gave him a second warning.
3rd time he began to say something...
She said I warned you, and punched his lights out. He fell to the ground Shocked of course.
He moves out of her way now 2 years later.
If women waited around for justice and followed "rules" and never stood up to disrespectful boys and men,
There would be more women found behind dumpsters raped.
NO ONE HAS THE RIGHT TO PUT THEIR HANDS ON YOU.
This is what our daughter knows.
Defend yourself verbally and physically.
And people wonder why women don't speak up about harassment and abuse.
The boy was a woos... how pathetic to start all this off and be rude to this girl then go running to the head teacher... I dont know what his pals think but I bet their having a fly s****** at him... he has to live with his clyping now...
Op,
I'm glad your daughter is strong and feels her self respect is worth defending.
A parents job is to supply their children with the tools needed to survive in this world.
Each child has their own set of tools unique to themselves.
Someone asked "is she trained to fight?"
So what if she is. Is there something wrong with that?
Someone posted she could have handled it better."
Really? So the disrespectful punk who grabbed her, he handled himself correctly?
Unless your child or yourself has been in this situation in a school setting with this ass backwards zero tolerance pc Bull****. ....you haven't a clue.
When did it become a crime to defend you self against danger, or in this case harassment?
This strong self respecting young girl,
And this asinine, weak, disrespectful young man...this is our future!
Op,
I'm glad your daughter is strong and feels her self respect is worth defending.
A parents job is to supply their children with the tools needed to survive in this world.
Each child has their own set of tools unique to themselves.
Someone asked "is she trained to fight?"
So what if she is. Is there something wrong with that?
Someone posted she could have handled it better."
Really? So the disrespectful punk who grabbed her, he handled himself correctly?
Unless your child or yourself has been in this situation in a school setting with this ass backwards zero tolerance pc Bull****. ....you haven't a clue.
When did it become a crime to defend you self against danger, or in this case harassment?
This strong self respecting young girl,
And this asinine, weak, disrespectful young man...this is our future!
Before anyone spouts off about schools having rules, so does life.
I choose life.
Would you be saying differently had he say, grabbed her breasts? She knows to only hit in self-defense and while he may not have punched her, I think grabbing her rear still counts as not only assault but sexual assault.
The boy did not know who he was messing with and I am sure he will think twice before doing it again.
Not to mention he started harassing her and as she put it she told him to "f off", and that is when he did it. I really hate this idea that women and girls if assaulted, even sexually assaulted should just take it.
jay if I'm your daughters father I would be smiling with pride that my daughter can and will take care of herself
however, here is the difference
when your daughter threw the first punch to the face- what if he punched back and broke her nose? would it be self defense?
If daughter went right to the principals office then he alone would be suspended or should be
on the upside,,,, football player just got his ass kicked by a girl, he will live that shame for years
don't read this the wrong way,,,but this is what I don't get (in general)
schools counsel kids from 1st grade whats acceptable- keep your hands to yourself
and in 5-6th grade,,,boys certainly don't randomly touch girls- ( boys know this) thru jr. high and high school.... of course you don't touch a girls butt- I cant imagine a guy doing this and thinking he can get away with it...... if a certain guy does- like this guy,,then he deserves to get punched because he's probly done that to many other girls with no response..
My mother was not the best Mother in the world---however there is one sentence she said to me growing up that has always stuck with me. "It is the second person that starts the fight."
It really makes sense...the second person's reaction will set the stage. Often it is more powerful to walk away, ignore and go through the proper channels.
I just feel it she would have just ignore his stupid words the next few things would not have happened. There will always be people that will say stupid stuff.
I am SO angry! It's really great I found a parenting forum because I need it. Why is it kids that defend themselves no matter how justifiable get in trouble?? My daughter who is 16 was walking to one of her classes when a boy started heckling her, when she told him to scram (what she said was worse, my daughter isn't afraid to stand up for herself) he grabbed her rear!
Now lots of other girls would be in shock or so surprised they just take it and tell a teacher but not my daughter. She immediately turned around, punched him in the face two times. Now my daughter is 5'10, takes martial arts and even lifts weights as well as other physically demanding things so she can hit pretty hard!
Well before even my daughter could tell what happened the boy (who is part of the football team no less) went straight to the principal so I get a call at work and immediately go up there. And my daughter is there and so is the boy with his mother and he is CRYING and bleeding from his nose! She got him good but was acting like the victim. The principal told me my daughter was suspended for five days and the whole "violence is never acceptable" speech despite HIM grabbing my daughter!
Even the boys mother was giving me real dirty looks. My daughter explained her case and it was obviously self-defense but that didn't seem to matter. Not that I want my daughter to use violence but in that case it was certainly justified.
I took my daughter home and said she was in the right and she wouldn't be in trouble at home.
But again, while I don't advocate violence I am proud of her, proud of her for not just taking it and turning this football player into a cry baby
I still find it absurd my daughter was suspended. I hate this zero tolerance or zero brain approach schools have.
I am SO angry! It's really great I found a parenting forum because I need it. Why is it kids that defend themselves no matter how justifiable get in trouble?? My daughter who is 16 was walking to one of her classes when a boy started heckling her, when she told him to scram (what she said was worse, my daughter isn't afraid to stand up for herself) he grabbed her rear!
Now lots of other girls would be in shock or so surprised they just take it and tell a teacher but not my daughter. She immediately turned around, punched him in the face two times. Now my daughter is 5'10, takes martial arts and even lifts weights as well as other physically demanding things so she can hit pretty hard!
Well before even my daughter could tell what happened the boy (who is part of the football team no less) went straight to the principal so I get a call at work and immediately go up there. And my daughter is there and so is the boy with his mother and he is CRYING and bleeding from his nose! She got him good but was acting like the victim. The principal told me my daughter was suspended for five days and the whole "violence is never acceptable" speech despite HIM grabbing my daughter!
Even the boys mother was giving me real dirty looks. My daughter explained her case and it was obviously self-defense but that didn't seem to matter. Not that I want my daughter to use violence but in that case it was certainly justified.
I took my daughter home and said she was in the right and she wouldn't be in trouble at home.
But again, while I don't advocate violence I am proud of her, proud of her for not just taking it and turning this football player into a cry baby
I still find it absurd my daughter was suspended. I hate this zero tolerance or zero brain approach schools have.
Sorry, but the principal is right. Your daughter might have stood up for herself, but she didn't report the incident, which means the guy would have just done the same thing to someone else and not gotten in trouble. If she had gone straight to the principal and reported that she was assaulted and defended herself, maybe she would not have been suspended. Although one wonders if punching someone in the face twice was really necessary, or if she was just angry. Either way, hopefully the boy was punished for sexual harrassment or assault (which is illegal in school as anywhere else), but the fact that your daughter responded with excessive violence and then didn't report it makes it a lot of he said/she said and might have led to the boy getting off the hook.
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