Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
What messaging might that be and how might that be received?
Well, I grew up as a fairly pretty young lady. Like it or not, some people will see clothing as advertising sexual availability to all comers. That was my experience anyway. Maybe we have become more civilized since then. Bwwaaaahhhaaaa.
Is there an age when girls/women should be able to dress in whatever way they want without having to consider the "perverts" out there?
Absolutely we should! Alas, we can't. Alas we are still asking for it if we have an alcoholic beverage. Other people get to choose for us what our clothes "mean". Short of walking down the street in a burka, I have been approached by men because I was wearing
pants.
a t shirt
a bathing suit at a pool.
This is, unfortunately, the world we live in. I would see my daughter not suffer some of the things I went through.
Well, I grew up as a fairly pretty young lady. Like it or not, some people will see clothing as advertising sexual availability to all comers. That was my experience anyway. Maybe we have become more civilized since then. Bwwaaaahhhaaaa.
What happens if people think a woman is advertising her sexual availability, even if she is not?
Are you saying women should base what they wear on the fact that some people will thing they are advertising their sexual availability?
I just feel that if I give in she'll just become more emboldened. And just because other mothers let their daughters dress scantily I don't see why I should. As for the thong, I know it may seem silly to not approve of but I have three reasons:
The general advice nowadays is to "chose your battles", but there is such a thing as "stand your ground" My mother used to say, kids want limits, even though they appear not to want them.
1. They are meant to be sexy and at my daughter's age that shouldn't be a priority, should I let her wear a lace push up bra as well?
2. Thongs can cause issues such as a UTI.
3. I don't want her showing off a "whale tail" as they call it like others do.
My daughter has plenty of time to grow up and "be sexy" when she's an adult. I don't view it as a crime that I want her to stick with higher cut tops, less revealing shorts and cotton brief underwear.
Good for you! Seems when parents try to assert themselves as parents, there's always someone to undermine them, members of the Perfect Parent Club
As my mother used to tell me, don't be in too much of a hurry to "grow up" You have all your life to be an adult, but only a few precious years to have a childhood.
What happens if people think a woman is advertising her sexual availability, even if she is not?
Are you saying women should base what they wear on the fact that some people will thing they are advertising their sexual availability?
It all depends on how concerned they are with their safety and how they are perceived by others. The way you seem to perceive it, nakedness would be appropriate, since the opinions and perceptions of others are immaterial...
What happens if people think a woman is advertising her sexual availability, even if she is not?
Are you saying women should base what they wear on the fact that some people will thing they are advertising their sexual availability?
I think that all people live in a world with other people. And thus, they need to keep themselves safe from the jerkier elements. What happened to me when someone thought that I was advertising my sexual availability ranged from 2 rapes to subway gropings to near misses.
I think her training in martial arts, fitness and self confidence will be great tools to avoid these dangers. But awareness is not a bad thing.
It all depends on how concerned they are with their safety and how they are perceived by others. The way you seem to perceive it, nakedness would be appropriate, since the opinions and perceptions of others are immaterial...
I'm not weighing in on one side or the other. I'm just presenting some questions that parents might want to consider when making decisions on these things.
I think nakedness would be a completely different matter since it is illegal most places. A women choosing what to wear, even if it is supposedly "hooker attire", is not illegal.
It sounds like the fear of most parents is that their daughters will be sexually molested or shamed (or the parents will be shamed) for wearing "suggestive" attire.
I think that all people live in a world with other people. And thus, they need to keep themselves safe from the jerkier elements. What happened to me when someone thought that I was advertising my sexual availability ranged from 2 rapes to subway gropings to near misses.
Based on what you have been saying about clothing choices, the logical conclusion would be tha maybe you should have been dressed more conservatively and your clothing choices were what led to the assaults.
The point where a young lady's attire could be considered inappropriate would be the point at which, were she to be accosted by an Islamic refugee, progressively minded people could dismiss the incident as a mere "cultural misunderstanding". I heard rumors of pamphlets being made up for European school girls which outlined some basic rules for them to follow to avoid such misunderstandings and I'd be willing to bet they contained some good common sense guildines for all of our daughters to follow.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
