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Old 08-01-2016, 02:04 PM
 
10,196 posts, read 9,848,445 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Girl View Post
To the person who anonymously messaged me that degrees are MORE important today - they are only important if you are going into an industry that requires higher learning, such as STEM.

But there are many of us out there who feel that 4-year colleges can (and should) be avoided. I'm encouraging my kids to consider ALL their options - tech schools, community colleges, as well as in-state schools. BUT, I'm not forcing my kids to go to college, and should they get into a school that costs big money, they will need to figure out a way to pay for it since their 529s may only cover a semester or two.

There are plenty of careers out there that don't require a 4-year degree. In many instances, a 2-year degree will suffice, if at all.
Not to mention the best way to go to a 4 year college for many people is to start with a 2 year college and save many, many thousands of dollars.
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Old 08-01-2016, 02:15 PM
 
Location: The analog world
17,077 posts, read 13,316,143 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by HighFlyingBird View Post
Not to mention the best way to go to a 4 year college for many people is to start with a 2 year college and save many, many thousands of dollars.
This does not work for everyone. Lots of people in Colorado have learned the hard way that one of our most popular and well-regarded universities will not accept a good portion of community college transfer credits. There have even been reported problems transferring credits between branch campuses! Forewarned is forearmed. Check, re-check and check again.
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Old 08-01-2016, 03:20 PM
 
Location: New Jersey
560 posts, read 537,959 times
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i think, back in the days (15-25 years and longer ago) college was much affordable that students could go to college on loans and paid it off within reasonable years. Nowadays, that isn't the case AT ALL anymore, so yes i do think parents have a responsibility to pay portions, if not all of their kids college as much they can afford. That way, kids will get a financial head start without graduating with a degree and be buried under ton of debt that they cannot even buy a home till well in their 30/40's.

this is on the cavent that parents do NOT use their home equity or touch their retirement in order to pay for kids college. Parents need to pay themselves FIRST and whatever is left they can save should go towards college funds.
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Old 08-01-2016, 03:52 PM
 
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I don't think that parents who don't save for college are bad parents. It is difficult to generalize and say that every single parent in the entire world must save to help their kids for college. Some people just can't.

I am going to go against the grain though and say that I do believe that parents have a responsibility to help their children become successful adults. With that in mind I believe that those who can help their children with college should do so. I don't think parents have to pay every dime. I don't think parents have to fund a high priced private school education. I do think that parents who can help in some way should do so.
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Old 08-01-2016, 04:17 PM
 
Location: Backwoods of Maine
7,487 posts, read 10,459,924 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Marleinie View Post
Parents saving for their kids college is considered to the thing to do, but if parents don't do you think that makes them automatically bad parents? In my case my parents never did.
Oh, good grief!

Another special snowflake whining about not having rich parents.
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Old 08-01-2016, 04:36 PM
 
Location: Somewhere in America
15,479 posts, read 15,564,516 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Marleinie View Post
Parents saving for their kids college is considered to the thing to do, but if parents don't do you think that makes them automatically bad parents? In my case my parents never did. They both had the idea of making it your own way. Not that they were mean or abusive in any way, just how they felt, not that they ever made that much.
How would this make anyone a bad parent? They're not beating their kids. They're not raping their kids. They're not starving their kids. They're not locking them in a cage. That's bad parenting.

Many people can't afford to save money for college for their kids. Certainly doesn't make them a bad parent. It could be making the monthly mortgage payment or rent is far more important than a college fund. I assure you being homeless is not a picnic. When you're homeless, you're not thinking about college. You're thinking about where you're going to sleep, when you'll get something to eat or drink, etc.

College is not a guarantee for anyone. Many people have paid their way through college and did just fine. Many kids flunk out of college for a variety of reasons. If they're stuck paying the bill, it should teach them some personal responsibility.
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Old 08-01-2016, 04:38 PM
 
Location: DFW/Texas
922 posts, read 1,106,369 times
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As I was growing up my parents always told me that I was going to go to college and that they would pay for it. They told the same thing to my 2 other siblings, too. My brother went to an in-state college and they paid for it. Then as my time came to go my parents came to me and asked me if it would be okay with me to use my college fund for something very important. I don't want to say what that was, as it would give away too much of my identity and I prefer to be as anonymous as possible. They told me that I could say no and they would be fine with it and that they would still be able to help me when I got there.

I said yes.

I ended up going to a local community college for 2 years and then finished up at a state college close to home. Given that the first few years of college are general ed based anyway, I didn't feel as if I was really missing out on much of anything. Not to mention that when I graduated college I had only a small amount of debt.

So, do I believe that parents who don't save for their kids' college educations are lacking? No. For most people these days it's not an option to save for retirement- and that is MUCH more important than saving for college, IMO- and pay for college, too.
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Old 08-01-2016, 04:39 PM
 
Location: Somewhere in America
15,479 posts, read 15,564,516 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by UNC4Me View Post
In most cases no. Not everyone has the means to help their kids with college costs. But, I have known a couple sets of parents who could have done so and instead spent lavishly on homes, cars, clothes, jewelry, eating out, country club memberships, plastic surgery, exotic vacations, and pretty much every form of conspicuous consumption instead of setting aside any funds for their kids to attend college. They could have easily done so, but their priority was not education.
Why was it on those parents to to spend the money that they earned on their children's education? Why aren't they entitled to spend the money they worked for on themselves? The kids also reaped the rewards in nice houses, cars, clothes, eating out, vacations, etc.
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Old 08-01-2016, 05:09 PM
 
Location: Wisconsin
19,480 posts, read 25,056,304 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BostonMike7 View Post
I think the expectations that parents always pay for college is a more recent thing.

I graduated college 12 years ago. Everyone of my peers had student loans. I've kept in touch with 15-20 or so and we often discussed the progress of our student loans, and even had parties when one person finished paying them off. I know my sample size is small, but my opinion is that parents paying for college seems to be a more recent theme, otherwise we wouldn't have article after article on how student loan debt is crippling millennials across the country.

In my opinion, parents should focus more on retirement, than college. The best gift a parent can give their child is not saddling them with the burden of taking care of an aging parent when they should be focused on their own personal life, kids, marriage, etc.

I never expected my parents to pay for my college, and I certainly don't fault them for it.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kibbiekat View Post
I think the opposite. I graduated 20 years ago and most people I knew had college expenses paid by parents. People in my parents generation could, in general, more easily afford to both save for college, and retirement. It's more difficult now with many companies doing away with paid retirement.
Although, in general college may have been more affordable then, I know a number of people who graduated about 20 years and most of them had to take out student loans.

While, I do not know the actual statistics. I think it really depends on your family situation and where you went to college. I bet that the experiences of people going to small, private schools vs. big public schools and highly competitive schools vs. ultimate safety schools would vary tremendously.
Thus, anecdotal information may be way off. I'll give an example, I had a good friend who recently passed away in her late 80s. She graduated from college in the late 1940s. She once commented that "Of course, my parents paid for my college education. Everyone that I know had parents who sent them to college and paid for everything." Well, perhaps among her friends but back in the 1940s my relatives were having trouble paying for food, let alone sending their children off to college.

I graduated from college 40 years ago and I do not know anyone who did not have to get at least some student loans, in addition, to working, even though college was a lot more affordable back then. Now, it is possible that some of my wealthier classmates may have had their parents pay for everything but they were not part of my social circle.
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Old 08-01-2016, 05:12 PM
 
Location: Greenville, SC
6,219 posts, read 5,919,433 times
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My stepdaughter went to college in the 1990s on scholarship. A good friend has five kids; the oldest went into the Navy, was educated as a nuclear engineer and now has a very nice job selling high-end pumps and related equipment to commercial markets. The next in line didn't want to go to college, and works as a manager in a department store. The third one was an athlete, majored in college in sports management working two part-time jobs during his four years of college and now has a good job installing and setting up medical practice software. The fourth is currently in the Navy. The youngest is in college studying chemistry and I believe has a scholarship. Two chose college and the parents are helping out but the kids aren't getting a free ride.

The notions that parents have to pay for their kids' education as some sort of moral imperative is absolutely ridiculous, as is the notion that to be a success in life (whatever that means to you) one has to have a college degree. There was a radio show over the weekend and the host was talking to several young women who had grown up poor, were single moms, felt called to the nursing field and made it happen, working multiple jobs to do so. If a kid has a burning desire to do something, she/he will find a way. If not, the kid should find something that doesn't require a major financial investment or years of learning and that will provide a good living.
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