Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I would think either you can password protect it, or take away his laptop, heck, when we were growing up, we didnt have internet, computers and laptops! We were made to use actual pens, paper and our brains to do the work.
Mike might be able to give you some pointers, too, ask him.
id say hes embarrassed more about getting caught (prob with wood) by his mom than what hes looking at.
Actually, it wasn't like I "caught him in the act" - it's not likely that my son is going to whack off at the dining room table after all, which is where the laptop is set up. It was checking the history of websites visited that enlightened me to what he was up to. It was as I read off the website names that he was getting embarassed. I hope that clears up any confusion or errant conclusions.
I'm not sure where some appear to have this conclusion that I went ballistic on my son, fwiw. My parenting appraoch does not include foaming at the mouth or browbeating.
We had a talk yesterday which went very well. The computer is off limits until I have a friend set up separate accounts/passwords and filters, except for school work (with visual supervision by me).
I will try to get caught up with points for those posters in this thread who I haven't got to yet - they are on the way as soon as the 24 hours have expired. Thanks again to EVERYONE who has contributed to this thread, it really has given me insight to nuances that had not occurred to me. Viva communication!
I'm sorry, I missed the fact that you were his mother, thus my suggestion for the father/son thing.
I do think it's important you get a positive male role model in his life. If he already has respect for those men you mentioned that's awesome. Maybe you can see if he's ok with those guys investing in him. I'll tell you that a young man can really be encouraged when an older man he respects looks him square in the eye and tells him that he's important to him and he wants to just hang out with him every once in a while to share life with him. Keep it very informal and if the relationship develops, then they can probably go through that book I mentioned or other material that can mature him in that area.
I'll tell you that a young man can really be encouraged when an older man he respects looks him square in the eye and tells him that he's important to him and he wants to just hang out with him every once in a while to share life with him...
If I were a kid, and my mother told some older guy I was looking at porno, and that guy looked me square in the eye and told me that I was important to him and he wanted to hang out with me and every once in a while share life with me, I would run like a bat out of Hell and lock myself in my room every time that guy came around.
I'm not sure where some appear to have this conclusion that I went ballistic on my son, fwiw. My parenting appraoch does not include foaming at the mouth or browbeating.
People don't read. I try to at least read the OP's thread if I come in late but I didn't get that from any of your posts.. What I got was you were concerned that he could get to the info & wanted to stop that, take away the temptation to go to a really bad site that could possibly screw up your computer.
Quote:
Originally Posted by DontH8Me
We had a talk yesterday which went very well. The computer is off limits until I have a friend set up separate accounts/passwords and filters, except for school work (with visual supervision by me).
I will try to get caught up with points for those posters in this thread who I haven't got to yet - they are on the way as soon as the 24 hours have expired. Thanks again to EVERYONE who has contributed to this thread, it really has given me insight to nuances that had not occurred to me. Viva communication!
This is very easy to do.. there's no reason why you can't do it. If you post what windows system you are using, I can type some directions up to get you started.
The ignorance in this thread is ridiculous. It is a natural thing. Go ahead and block it and he will just find a friend who has access to it. It solves nothing. It's not a bad thing. It's a teenage hormone thing. Computers aren't expensive these days if you're not going for the "secret agent's best friend". Buy him his own computer and let that be his computer to use for entertainment purposes. I don't understand why parents think they're acting in their children's best interest by trying to censor what they see, watch on tv, or listen to. It's stupid and it doesn't accomplish anything. Parents should be focusing on more important things, like making sure their children will do good in life. Whether they watch explicit things or not has nothing to do with that. Be a parent. Not an authoritarian.
Signed,
A younger generation American, who understands minors more than most.
The ignorance in this thread is ridiculous. It is a natural thing. Go ahead and block it and he will just find a friend who has access to it. It solves nothing. It's not a bad thing. It's a teenage hormone thing. Computers aren't expensive these days if you're not going for the "secret agent's best friend". Buy him his own computer and let that be his computer to use for entertainment purposes. I don't understand why parents think they're acting in their children's best interest by trying to censor what they see, watch on tv, or listen to. It's stupid and it doesn't accomplish anything. Parents should be focusing on more important things, like making sure their children will do good in life. Whether they watch explicit things or not has nothing to do with that. Be a parent. Not an authoritarian.
Signed,
A younger generation American, who understands minors more than most.
If you read my post from this morning you will see that I have 2 computers here that are down due to a kids surfing habits. It's one thing to see some mild sites but IMO the hard core stuff should be blocked.
I've had one of the 2 computers twice, plus the father has already had it at Best buy for a reinstall to the tune of $300.
Sure computers are cheap but if they look at the wrong sites that cheap computer can cost you a lot of money. Let them ruin Johnny's computer that way until Johnny's mother/father find out how to protect it.
If you read my post from this morning you will see that I have 2 computers here that are down due to a kids surfing habits. It's one thing to see some mild sites but IMO the hard core stuff should be blocked.
I've had one of the 2 computers twice, plus the father has already had it at Best buy for a reinstall to the tune of $300.
Sure computers are cheap but if they look at the wrong sites that cheap computer can cost you a lot of money. Let them ruin Johnny's computer that way until Johnny's mother/father find out how to protect it.
If he messes up a computer, that is his fault, but trying to censor what he views is still ridiculous. Porn and computer trouble aren't synonomous. Tying the two together is just crazy. Blame his surfing habits, not pornography. And I'm not going to go into a thousand word explanation on why you should not censor what your children watch or hear, but you'll just brush if off and accept the standard these days that censoring your children's entertainment makes you a "good" parent. It doesn't.
If you read my post from this morning you will see that I have 2 computers here that are down due to a kids surfing habits. It's one thing to see some mild sites but IMO the hard core stuff should be blocked.
I've had one of the 2 computers twice, plus the father has already had it at Best buy for a reinstall to the tune of $300.
Sure computers are cheap but if they look at the wrong sites that cheap computer can cost you a lot of money. Let them ruin Johnny's computer that way until Johnny's mother/father find out how to protect it.
put linux on it. you can then hit the wildest of sites.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
