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No, I assure you, it's real. Truth be told I figured I'd be getting most of these kind of responses, but at the very least wanted to vent. On the bright side my husband asked me what I wanted. I told him that personally I think she should be sent to boot camp. There is one not to far away. I think it would be good for her and best for me and my husband. Yes, I admit I may be a "bad' step-mom but I honestly don't care, now that she has stolen from me she really needs discipline. I really don't believe in counseling or therapy, just people making good money off of others suffering.
My husband did say he would think about it. Sending her off to boot camp would be great.
Just boot camp huh? Sure, that's one way to get rid of her, but it's only temporary. Eventually she'll come home. You're going soft OP! Surely there are more permanent solutions you are considering. Just make sure you watch a lot of forensic files so you don't get caught.
Unless you have a lot of extra money to give to the boot camp, maybe if you do, she won't come back.
I mean, given how realistic this post is, might as well just go whole hog with it, right?! Lifetime sure has scraped the bottom of the barrel these days...
WOW, the OP said some horrible things but this is horrible too. People that aren't already parents don't have the skills to parent and risk harm to your children?!? I'm not defending the OP in any way, but the judgement and expectation of step parents by pretty much everybody (including therapists) is terrible - your comment is a perfect example of this. You are expected to cook, clean, financially support, and love these children - but not overstep your boundaries and replace their real mom and never, ever discipline. Then face extreme judgement and lack of empathy in those situations where you do have a child that doesn't return that caring and respect and get frustrated by that. You have to do this with a smile on your face at all times, because yes (and I get it) this is what you signed up for when marrying someone with children. I am a stepmother with no biological children of my own (not by choice, and an area of real heartbreak for me) - but I don't think that makes me unable to have good parenting skills. Yes, I knew what I was getting into and yes I give more than I get in this situation and yes it is worth it because I love my husband and my stepsons. Even though I have a great relationship with my stepstons, it will never be the same as being their mother so there are many times that you feel marginalized. Before they went off to college, they lived with us almost full time. I cooked, cleaned, provided emotional support, supported the family 100% financially when my husband was hit with a layoff during the recession, never disciplined or criticized because I didn't feel that was my place or worth the risk of being called the evil stepmother, and always supported their mother so as not to overstep my bounds and worked with her to create a good extended family situation where we even had holidays together. I guess my husband and stepsons really got hit with a crappy, abusive situation with me being a "guinea pig" parent. I am not complaining because again I know what I signed up for and I do care for my stepsons so much, but the worst part is the never ending judgement and criticism from pretty much everyone when you are a step parent - especially one with no chidren of their own. You feel that you just don't have any right to be exhausted, frustrated, and angry sometimes because it is so hard - because no one will ever show you one ounce of understanding. And god forbid you ever voice this frustration. You can say that someone in my situation shouldn't marry someone with children (because I lack the qualification and skill to be a good parent!), but that is so easy to say when you aren't in that situation and you happen to fall in love with someone. I was very concerned about this when my husband proposed to me and it was a major discussion point, but he wanted the marriage so badly and convinced me we could make it work. And we did.
I could throw the same judgement as you and say what kind of parent have YOU been and what values have you instilled in your own children with this kind of judgement and lack of empathy for others?
I know I'm being a bit over the top here with this rant, but I just find this kind of comment so upsetting as unfortunately this is how most people view step parents.
Oh my. Chill. It was a tongue-in-cheek response. And even then it was about potential risk, not certain harm.
I myself have 2 excellent step parents, and I'm happily married so dating is not something I've thought much about.
But hypothetically if people can say "I won't date someone with kids" why can't someone say "I'll only date people with kids"...??
Funny...as a parent it made me think the opposite: If I were single, there's no way I would allow my children would be someone's parenting Guinea pigs. No way. I wouldn't date someone who wasn't already a fantastic parent. No one is worth harm to my children.
aren't you the pseudo therapist who recommended I go to therapy?
again, I'm really curious what your professional accreditations are.
I think 2 single parents are perfect for each other. No need to bring unnecessary hassle a childless person's life.
No, I assure you, it's real. Truth be told I figured I'd be getting most of these kind of responses, but at the very least wanted to vent. On the bright side my husband asked me what I wanted. I told him that personally I think she should be sent to boot camp. There is one not to far away. I think it would be good for her and best for me and my husband. Yes, I admit I may be a "bad' step-mom but I honestly don't care, now that she has stolen from me she really needs discipline. I really don't believe in counseling or therapy, just people making good money off of others suffering.
My husband did say he would think about it. Sending her off to boot camp would be great.
Please do NOT send her to a boot camp. These places are abusive and they are also not effective. It will cause more harm than good. That poor child needs help not punishment.
My stepson was caught stealing at his house, and I would guess lifted a few dollars at ours - though he might have been too scared. We are much more strict.
This made me uncomfortable, I am such a huge proponent of the home being a safe nest. But I got over it, and he has straightened out quite a bit. The job of adults is to teach children.
I hope no one wants the lesson that if you screw up you are outta here! Especially for this child who was abandoned because of death.
I can't imagine what the adults were thinking bringing in a woman who dislikes children. Was the OP so desperate for marriage that she married into a family when all she wanted was the dude? Did she lie to him about that? Did he not talk to the daughter before the marriage?
I hope she leaves them, and the father realizes the type of person she is.
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No, I assure you, it's real. Truth be told I figured I'd be getting most of these kind of responses, but at the very least wanted to vent. On the bright side my husband asked me what I wanted. I told him that personally I think she should be sent to boot camp. There is one not to far away. I think it would be good for her and best for me and my husband. Yes, I admit I may be a "bad' step-mom but I honestly don't care, now that she has stolen from me she really needs discipline. I really don't believe in counseling or therapy, just people making good money off of others suffering.
My husband did say he would think about it. Sending her off to boot camp would be great.
I can't even.
Will someone PLEASE help this girl!!! Like a grandparent, aunt, uncle, best friend's parents...someone. There's ABSOLUTELY NOTHING this girl can do that deserves to be sent to boot camp. HER MOTHER DIED FOR GOD'S SAKE!!!!!!
Boot camp is probably the LAST thing your stepchild needs. I would however, recommend that someone like you look into it. You really need your @ss kicked around until you learn what being a responsible adult is all about.
I hope your husband has a spine and sends you instead.
You're right! The OP needs to go to Parent Boot Camp.
Well as a step parent my role is more limited than otherwise, I would feel a lot better if I could punish her. But my husband lets her get away with everything. I am tired of dealing with her and wish my husband would do something to help.
Yes, I am really pissed right now, and I really hate the thought of dealing with her another three years.
You will be dealing with her the rest of your life!
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