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I have found that once you have kids with all the holidays, extracurricular activities, half days, meetings, and everything else factored in with the cost of child care (before care, after care and summer camp) we were pretty much working 2 jobs to juggle our kids around.
We made the decision 2 years ago to have one of us stay at home. We sold our house and bought a smaller house in a better town (which reduced our mortgage significantly - we pay less than it would cost to rent a studio apartment) It was really the best decision. My kids can now partake in things like girl scouts and have a nice home cooked dinner at a normal time, and have a parent there to help with homework, projects, etc.
The working spouse gets extra special treatment at the end of the day because staying home and raising kids does not compare to commuting and dealing with toxic people all day. If both of us were working it would just be too exhausting to devote extra special time to a spouse. But, since only one of us works it works out well and working spouse is less stressed.
Weekends used to be spent cleaning, grocery shopping, and everything else that couldn't be done during the week. Now, the weekends are ours to enjoy.
I guess we changed our routine to accommodate our kids early education needs.
Get used to it, once your child starts school you are at the mercy of the school schedule. Donuts with Dad, muffins with mom, Christmas parties, field day, parent-teacher conferences, concerts, award ceremonies etc. all have the potential to be held during the day. This is just the beginning. The teachers try their best but can't be expected to cater to every parents schedule.
Get used to it, once your child starts school you are at the mercy of the school schedule. Donuts with Dad, muffins with mom, Christmas parties, field day, parent-teacher conferences, concerts, award ceremonies etc. all have the potential to be held during the day. This is just the beginning. The teachers try their best but can't be expected to cater to every parents schedule.
That's exactly why I am not willing to use vacation time for the intake appointment. I don't have enough vacation time to cover all that you listed, and will need to pick and choose. I'm opting out of using vacation time for the intake appointment - either they can do it on my schedule or I'll skip it altogether.
You think you should get special treatment....thats so cute!
If you cant commit or have your work ok it, then maybe you should homeschool or find another alternative. Kindergarten is pretty easy and light compared to older grades.
What did you think it would like?
That's exactly why I am not willing to use vacation time for the intake appointment. I don't have enough vacation time to cover all that you listed, and will need to pick and choose. I'm opting out of using vacation time for the intake appointment - either they can do it on my schedule or I'll skip it altogether.
Most parents don't go to all of the activities listed. You'll probably need to take time off for parent/teacher conference which will be once or twice a year. Other then that you won't be expected to attend the class parties, field trips, etc. You'll need your PTO for when your kid is sick and needs to stay home and for the many days when school is not in session due to holidays, teacher work days etc.
We are a two-income family as well with two kids. This month, we have two parent-teacher orientations on two different days, an emergency dental appointment, vaccination/checkup, and another meeting with class teacher for my son. All in a three week span. Either we schedule them as early as we can (8am), or as late as possible (3pm), so we can still go in and work for 5 or 6 hours. Or, take the PTO/NPTO or anything to make it works. Sometimes, I will go in to work on Saturdays to make up the time. Most of the colleagues of mine are doing the same for theirs, skipping lunch, taking an hour off in the morning and come in at 10am...etc.
I take a lot of time off work to go to meetings or events at my kids' school, and also to take my kids to their doctor appointments. My youngest has special needs, so she has more teacher meetings, IEP meetings, and doctor appointments than my oldest. My husband's work schedule is less flexible than mine, so I am usually the one who takes off for all these things.
The school did have their big "back to school" night in the evening. Well, it started at 4pm, so I did still have to leave work early. But all other school meetings are generally held during the school day, or sometimes right after school (which doesn't really help much - my kids stay in the afterschool program). I try to make doctor appointments for after school too, so that at least my kids don't have to miss school even if I have to miss work, but this is often not possible either.
For the month of August, I have had to take time off from work 5 times for something related to my kids. This month has been particularly busy, but I would say that in almost every 2 week pay period, I have to take PTO at least once because of an appointment either at school or at a doctor. I try my best to schedule things for either the beginning or the end of the day if I can, but it is often not possible. I'm just lucky that my job is pretty flexible, and that I acrue enough of PTO. I am able to take time off in small increments too, so if I leave 2 hours early, I only have to use 2 hours of PTO for that, not a whole day.
Ouch, some really rude responses in this thread.
In my husband's case, work is almost an hour car and train ride away. My job has very odd hours and involves a lot of travel, "lunch break" is often eating a granola bar while driving across town.
Go to a school meeting during lunch break?
Ha! Must be nice for those of you who work across the street from your kid's school and have an hour lunch right at noon.
Luckily our kids schools offer early morning and late evening appointments, phone conferences and 1 teacher even came in on Saturday.
OP: speak to your child's teacher to see what can be done. There is nothing selfish or wrong about needing an accommodation.
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because staying home and raising kids does not compare to commuting and dealing with toxic people all day. If both of us were working it would just be too exhausting to devote extra special time to a spouse. But, since only one of us works it works out well and working spouse is less stressed.
