When Aunt Tamara is a Law Enforcement Researcher

[oregonwoodsmoke]

It's the brother's call about what his kids see. He doesn't want them seeing it, then have all the crime books and mature level books in a separate office and keep the door locked when the kids are there.

Personally, I think that books on anatomy and art books with some nudes are OK for young kids as long as the nudity isn't violent. But that isn't your call. Books about perversions are not for childhood consumption, even if they are scientific studies.

I am reading between the lines that the brother is a drug user. Makes sure he understands that no drugs are allowed on your property, not even in the trunk of his car. If he is not reliable to keep drugs off of your property, then meeting with the kids are going to have to be in a neutral location.

[TamaraSavannah]

Originally Posted by txtqueen

When I went to my moms step brothers place as a teen I couldn't give two craps what was there. My phone didn't work at his house and my mom let me have a Smirnoff. I wasn't paying attention to anyhghing.

She's 12 she's going to want the wifi password not sift through your book collection.

She's going to be VERY DISAPPOINTED on that matter for my satellite internet is far too expensive to use for anything except brief pop ups to check for weather alerts/maps (use a short wave weather radio mostly) and social media for last minute changes before I take off on the journey.

Which brings up an interesting point................................what do kids do these days when there is no internet? When there is no TV in the popular sense (no cable, no streaming, no dish, no transmission)?

Originally Posted by DewDropInn

Unless you have a private armory and the room is jammed with gun vaults....put the books you consider questionable in the gun vault room. Put a lock on the door into that room.

Well, there are two problems to that. First of all, EXACTLY.

Secondly, that room classifies as a storm safe room. This last weekend when we had tornado alerts, that room was open with phones and weather radio already inside in case the cats and I needed to retreat to it which was "a windowless room in the interior of the house on the ground floor". Further, it is a safe room, it is a "priest hole" and locking such so a certain occupant of the house can't get to it does not seem that wise (access to the weaponry in their vaults can still be restricted, though).

Originally Posted by aridon

If they are old enough to ask they are old enough to hear an answer that satisfies them. Obviously that will vary depending on age and interest.

Well, that is sort of what I am asking. I do not have children, so I don't know. I believe, though, I would probably leave such answers to the parents.

Rather reminds me of the time when I was working on Saturday in the genetics fruit fly lab when another classmate was there with his son. Somewhere in the talking, the term "virgin" came up. I looked over at the father and said, "I'll let you answer that question.".

Originally Posted by Aery11

Would they be coming to stay more than for a few hours or the day? If so, I see all your questions about the books might have more relevance and you may want to reconsider the visit completely if you are so concerned not only about your niece seeing things her father might not be happy with but your clearance.

If not, and you are still worried but still want to see them, at least for the first visit, my inclination would be to suggest a 'family outing' to a zoo or something like that, or take a picnic to a park, or go to a restaurant and save all the hassles probably on all sides of this potentially complicated coin. Perhaps during that meeting you can feel your sibling out a bit to see what he thinks about visiting you at the ranch in future (or decide better for yourself whether you even want him to!) and see how mature your niece seems to be as well.

I originally asked this question on the basis of a holiday visit but now thinking about it, I can see how it might get more on the long term either in the short or long range. Short range might be like a hurricane "bug out" (or wild fire) from the coast. Long range might be a financial crisis but putting either one aside for the moment, let me focus on the holiday visit.

Basically, if they are traveling the 3 hours out of Houston, they are probably spending the night, be it my place or a hotel. Staying at a hotel would not be out of the question but such should be their decision since I am the hostess.

Such a particular approach brings another situation to mind such as what to do when a girlfriend with children need a place to stay and I believe the best answer is to let her see the place first and decide what rules, what restrictions she wants to put down for her children.

Originally Posted by oregonwoodsmoke

It's the brother's call about what his kids see. He doesn't want them seeing it, then have all the crime books and mature level books in a separate office and keep the door locked when the kids are there.

Indeed it is his call and perhaps in more ways than one. It would not surprise me, much, if he had concerns if I had a Koran in my home for example. I don't anymore, it was in English, used for my studies into Islamic law, and was lost in my move from the apartments. I don't think I have a copy of Mein Kampf or Goebbels memoirs, the latter used during studies on government propaganda, but I could be wrong. Seeing things from those angles, I think the best answer is for him to decide what should be visible.

Personally, I think that books on anatomy and art books with some nudes are OK for young kids as long as the nudity isn't violent. But that isn't your call. Books about perversions are not for childhood consumption, even if they are scientific studies.

I tend to agree even if others might say, "If it is in the library, then it is okay.". Before I was Confirmed, around 7th grade, I would spend my time after "Sunday" school in the ARAMCO (ie, our Sunday was actually Friday) library reading Amnesty's International report of torture in Greece; for some reason, I recalled being "bred" for a certain degree of bloodthirstiness. Probably not the best book for impressionable young minds in the worlds of the 1970s when the movies where Roger Corman and not Saw.

I am reading between the lines that the brother is a drug user. Makes sure he understands that no drugs are allowed on your property, not even in the trunk of his car. If he is not reliable to keep drugs off of your property, then meeting with the kids are going to have to be in a neutral location.

That and levels, at least in the past, of family drama, as the stories go, which scared me to be around in case the cops were called. To the first, yes, that is upmost in my mind especially if a bug out situation should occur. To the second and on this thread's subject, I don't know in at least 3 ways. I don't know because I also have books of psychology and domestic violence in my library and would a youth reading such apply that to them, either way. Ie, in the lighter sense, it is not unknown for psychology students to believe that they have what they read about.

I don't know in regards to myself about if I should be around when such is happening of how I should respond. I am not an enforcer and do not have any power to intervene beyond that of any civilian preventing a felony (nutshell).

Finally, I don't know from angle of the activism I am involved in. That is to say, for an example scenario, "I don't want her reading what your feminist friends say about such.".

AAAH! What a nest of worms I have dug up when I once thought it was only about nudes!

[Fifty Seven]

Ask your brother if you can take your niece on a vacation for a week or so over the summer, or even just a few days. You seem to have a unique perspective on the world that would be beneficial for your niece to be exposed to, under controlled circumstances. It might do you some good to find out more about her perspective on the world as well. Also, while on this trip, find out how old she is.