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Also each generation of kids has new advantages and tech. And that's normal.
My dad didn't have tv (b. 1940).
I had tv but barely any channels and no internet (b. 1976).
My kids have streaming/wireless access to everything (b. 2011).
I still think my childhood was super awesome. I don't think my kids are more spoiled than I was.
This.
I never went without. We ate out quite a bit, we went to the movies pretty much every weekend, I had a TV and video game console in my room from age 6/7, I had plenty of toys and other things, and we did fun things on a regular basis, and yet, I wasn't entitled. I appreciated what my parents did for me, and I quite enjoyed my childhood and adolescence. I didn't get that pager I wanted in high school. A lot of my peers had cool pagers. I also had a silly Tracfone, my first, at 17 that was only to be used to call home when I was out at school functions or at a friend's house. I'm at the tail-end of the Oregon Trail generation complete with AOL dial-up internet my sophomore year of high school. I didn't get my first smart phone until I was 25. My kids live in a time where they have access to more technology, conveniences and information than I had at their age, and no doubt, when they have children they'll feel the same way about how good the new generation has it compared to today's youth. Heck, video games have come a long way! I'm stoked to see what the technology will look like in 15+ years.
I do things similarly with my own children. They have HDTVs in their rooms, tablets, computers, gaming consoles, cool gadgets, toys, etc. We enjoy eating out and doing fun activities as a family on a regular basis. We go to the movies fairly often and I do fun outings with my older kids (hair/nails/shopping), just like my mother did with me. And guess what? They're not entitled, self-absorbed, indulgent, etc. They appreciate what we do for them, the experiences and activities we enjoy as a family, and they understand the value of money.
Old people complain about the younger folks. Lack of appreciation, lack of understanding.
Kids grow up, learn about the world. Become old and complain about the younger folk, lack of appreciation and lack of understanding about the world.
Repeat.
Hate to tell you all, this cycle has been going on since man existed. Nothing has changed, young tend to be dumb and unappreciative. As you get older you become more appreciative of things because you have to earn them and pay for them. Most of all, you've failed, made mistakes and hopefully learned to not repeat them.
There is a certain amount of life experience you gain as you age and experience life. This stuff is difficult to teach and many parents don't bother trying.
All said, nothing has changed. Only your perspective.
Hmm ... I think things HAVE changed & that would include parents & kids.
There just wasn't so much ... STUFF. 100 years ago most people did not have access to grocery stores, you would take your "order" to the counter of a "General Store" & they would fill it for you. B&W TV became popular post WWII but many households would listen to popular evening talk radio shows into the 1950's.
When I was a teenager (1980's) we had "Boomboxes", Walkmans, & landlines (with a dial vs buttons).
I mean, yes; every generation complains about the "kids these days" but until recently that meant discipline, manners, etc ...But now we have STUFF.
I'll confess; I could be doing a better job when it comes to all this crap & my kids. And whats worse is that I'm NOT in a position to do this. It's maybe my "easy out" in that I'm trying to compensate for the fact that the youngest is disabled & I haven't been able to work for 10 years.
I try too hard & I know it. I think it started about 4 years ago when he finally could tell me what he wanted for Christmas. He was 9 years old before he could say "Legos" ... & I won't lie ... I went without dinner to afford some of those Lego sets.
I know how counter-intuitive this sounds but it's the honest truth. I go overboard with his sisters too but the older kids would say they had a much different experience with me (& thats when I COULD afford it)..
It's something I struggle with as a parent, because my husband and I genuinely have more disposable income than either of us did as kids, and our children (who are now teens) know that we are not hard up. I feel that we buy them too much and they get too many treats, but we also live in an affluent area and it's hard to tell them they can't have or do this-or-that, when all their friends have it and they know perfectly well we can afford it. (I'm talking about things like movies and getting lunch with friends, not luxury cars or ponies). Saying "No" because "We're the parents, and we can say No for no reason at all," just seems to make them resentful.
It was definitely easier to limit their treats when they were little. We were very strict then. Computer time only on the weekend, no TV at all, and definitely no sodas! Teenagers are a different ballgame, though.
I completely agree with this comment about teen's activities as it mirrors my teen's life. Yes, you can say no, just to say no (and there are times that we do), but at some point saying no just because there are mor social opportunities than when I was a child is short-sighted and can increase resentment.
40-50 years ago, remember when, if, you got a special present from mom or dad, maybe a can of pop, or a candy bar, or a small box of candy for valentine's day. Back then, it seemed you received less, but appreciated more. McDonald's may be a monthly treat.
And forty years ago in the 1970s, kids were relatively indulged compared to forty years prior to that in the 1930s. And in the 1930s, people probably shook their heads at how so many kids got to spend their entire childhoods in school rather than going off to work in the mines or textile mills at ages 10 or 12 - you know, like happened frequently decades before. Those kids were so 'indulged'.
I have plenty of fondness for aspects of my youth, but I realize that fondness is mostly borne of familiarity and does not represent some sort of superiority over today's different world.
Isn't that the point of striving to do better? So you can provide your children with the things you didn't have? Or so that basic mundane items like gloves aren't considered a treat but a necessary item?
Of course this can be taken to the extreme but I don't find it odd that our kids are provided with more than the kids of the 1950's. Because those kids were also provided with more than the kids from the 1900's. It's called progression.
The previous generation complaining about the next generation, as always.
When you watched a color TV or used a microwave as a child, I'm sure your parents thought you were spoiled too and had a sense of instant gratification.
It's not the next generation's fault that technology advances and everything gets more and more convenient.
40-50 years ago, remember when, if, you got a special present from mom or dad, maybe a can of pop, or a candy bar, or a small box of candy for valentine's day. Back then, it seemed you received less, but appreciated more. McDonald's may be a monthly treat.
A movie was a rare treat, and if you drank all your pop at once, sorry it's gone. Some nights, if you were lucky, you might be able to watch Johnny Carson's monologue, if you got a pair of gloves, don't lose them because you won't get another, and they meant it.
Today, kids seems to be over indulged in everything.
How do you all out there think this is effecting our youth and culture. As a teacher I see a lot of need for immediate gratification. Nothing is special, and if you don't get something you scream it's unfair.
I hate antagonizing the younger generations, but...I believe all this giving and expecting is creating a culture of many wants and misunderstanding of what are needs. WHAT DO YOU THINK
Yes... I am also guilty of indulging my kids.
I don't know. My kids don't drink soda. We don't buy soda. As for fast food, maybe they eat Wendy's 1-2 times every 2-3 months. Movies, maybe 3-4 times a year. The only thing they have that I didn't are tablets and I am gen x.
I know many parents who indulge their kids today but I also know many of my friends were indulged when I was growing up. Or maybe they aren't/weren't. I don't see eating fast food or drinking soda as a a good thing.
40-50 years ago, remember when, if, you got a special present from mom or dad, maybe a can of pop, or a candy bar, or a small box of candy for valentine's day. Back then, it seemed you received less, but appreciated more. McDonald's may be a monthly treat.
A movie was a rare treat, and if you drank all your pop at once, sorry it's gone. Some nights, if you were lucky, you might be able to watch Johnny Carson's monologue, if you got a pair of gloves, don't lose them because you won't get another, and they meant it.
Today, kids seems to be over indulged in everything.
How do you all out there think this is effecting our youth and culture. As a teacher I see a lot of need for immediate gratification. Nothing is special, and if you don't get something you scream it's unfair.
I hate antagonizing the younger generations, but...I believe all this giving and expecting is creating a culture of many wants and misunderstanding of what are needs. WHAT DO YOU THINK
Yes... I am also guilty of indulging my kids.
It's completely out of control. We are failing kids by doing this, and creating monsters. Kids today are completely industrialized, don't know what nature is, and don't know how to feed themselves. What I'm saying is not harsh, it's truly reality. The extreme is that we think nothing of it.... we think it's all normal. None of this is normal!
I do think the indulgence has increased over normal bc of the guilt of parents who no longer have time for their kids.
When I was a kid, the parents of the few 2 working parent families tended to have a more indulgent attitude towards their kids. Same with divorced/blended families.
Now you see that same attitude with away more of the kids because almost all the parents are both working and there are more missing original parents.
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