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Old 03-11-2017, 10:53 AM
 
Location: Wherever life takes me.
6,190 posts, read 7,959,089 times
Reputation: 3325

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Quote:
Originally Posted by aridon View Post
Wow some of the posts in this thread are just crazy.

Look there is a HUGE difference between telling your 20 something kid:

"No you can't have boys or girls in your room with the door closed"

Or

Hovering by the door listening intently to see if they are shagging because you're all caught up in your head over it.

Other side of the equation:

There is also a difference between hearing your son or daughter climaxing, screaming loudly as the bed is slamming against the wall. After which the guy puts on his shorts, opens the door and gives you a smile on the way out as he leaves.

None of those are acceptable forms of behavior and I doubt kids act like that in their parents home although I don't doubt parents treat their adult children like that.

Quite frankly I find it ridiculous that people are so caught up in the thought that they have to go to extreme measures to prevent sex in their home. It is like you sit there and dream up all the possible ways you could be offended over what two consenting adults are doing together.

Pretty ridiculous to force your kid to stay in a hotel or away from you because they MIGHT have sex in your house so you break up their arrangement. People are nitwits.
Exactly.
If you notice it's a common theme in the whole country.
Everything must be controlled for everyone. People can't live and let live. Well majority can't.
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Old 03-11-2017, 11:35 AM
 
Location: here
24,873 posts, read 36,102,689 times
Reputation: 32726
1) The OP never came back

2) As usual, the CD community took this 20 year old wanting to watch TV in her room with her BF, and compared it to everything from teens having sex while their parents were home, to 30 year olds still living at home and having "sex parties."

Calm down people. This thread needs to die.

This is not your 15 year old having sex in your house. This is not your 30 year old visiting with her spouse. This is not your 20-something visiting with her live-in BF. This is not anyone wanting to have group sex under their parent's roof. This is a 20 year old napping in the family room with her BF.
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Old 03-12-2017, 06:00 AM
 
Location: South Florida
196 posts, read 158,556 times
Reputation: 294
Quote:
Originally Posted by txtqueen View Post
Why don't you reread what I said...

If you tell a person to move out and pay for their own stuff if they'd like to make the rules...and then they go on and move out and find elsewhere to do the activities they're not allowed to do at home....don't whine when they do.

The OP was whining about how the daughter started spending the night at her boyfriends.
Like what did she expect? She said no under her roof.
Her daughter found another roof to do it under.
So why was mom still crying like a little whiney baby?
Why don't you re read what I SAID? The point is that it's very easy to get an adult child to stop whatever they are doing that you don't like in your house -- again, IN your house -- by throwing them out. Oh, now that you're out you're going to have sex? Congratulations -- just not in my house and not when I'm supporting you. You can do whatever you want when you live on your own. When you're in my house, I can set any rule I want and throw you out any time for any reason. What your opinion on it is doesn't matter.

By your own old posts and admissions, you are near 30 (with no kids) and are still near totally dependent on your family to support you. I am not really tempted to take your advice, sorry.
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Old 03-12-2017, 06:58 AM
 
1,752 posts, read 3,744,667 times
Reputation: 2089
Oh look another long thread where the OP's only post is the first one!
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Old 03-12-2017, 12:54 PM
 
Location: Foot of the Rockies
90,316 posts, read 120,488,465 times
Reputation: 35920
I agree the thread needs to die. That the OP has not been back is "telling". Some people thought the OP was a hoax; I'm not so sure. If it was, all the more reason to close the thread. We don't even seem to be talking about the OP any more. If the OP was sincere, apparently s/he didn't get the help s/he was looking for.
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Old 03-15-2017, 08:08 PM
 
Location: Wherever life takes me.
6,190 posts, read 7,959,089 times
Reputation: 3325
Quote:
Originally Posted by Whereitwent View Post
Why don't you re read what I SAID? The point is that it's very easy to get an adult child to stop whatever they are doing that you don't like in your house -- again, IN your house -- by throwing them out. Oh, now that you're out you're going to have sex? Congratulations -- just not in my house and not when I'm supporting you. You can do whatever you want when you live on your own. When you're in my house, I can set any rule I want and throw you out any time for any reason. What your opinion on it is doesn't matter.

By your own old posts and admissions, you are near 30 (with no kids) and are still near totally dependent on your family to support you. I am not really tempted to take your advice, sorry.
Excuse me?
Totally dependent?
Like hell I am.
I don't see how paying my bills makes me dependent.
Whatever.

The OP didn't share your same mindset.
She decided to whine and cry about her daughter spending the night at the boyfriends house instead of at home.
Which is really stupid.
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Old 03-15-2017, 08:44 PM
 
Location: South Florida
196 posts, read 158,556 times
Reputation: 294
Quote:
Originally Posted by txtqueen View Post
Excuse me?
Totally dependent?
Like hell I am.
I don't see how paying my bills makes me dependent.
Whatever.

The OP didn't share your same mindset.
She decided to whine and cry about her daughter spending the night at the boyfriends house instead of at home.
Which is really stupid.
Just like living in a relative's spare house and claiming to be independent? Give me a break.

Yeah, she's the owner of the house, she's allowed to whine ad naseum about anything she wants. And, just as well, the OP's post follows all of the rules of the City Data TOS, so I don't see what the problem is.
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Old 03-15-2017, 09:06 PM
 
Location: here
24,873 posts, read 36,102,689 times
Reputation: 32726
Quote:
Originally Posted by txtqueen View Post
Excuse me?
Totally dependent?
Like hell I am.
I don't see how paying my bills makes me dependent.
Whatever.

The OP didn't share your same mindset.
She decided to whine and cry about her daughter spending the night at the boyfriends house instead of at home.
Which is really stupid.
You don't pay rent. When grandma said she might sell the house you live in, you threw a tantrum on CD and whined that you were always traveling, never home, and couldn't/shouldn't have to pay for a real place to live full time. Yes, that's what you did. Oh, and your car that grandma bought... but you pay your "bills..." You don't know what "bills" are. I've had a mortgage, sometimes 2, since I was 26.

//www.city-data.com/forum/non-r...ry-issues.html


post #6
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Old 03-16-2017, 07:01 AM
 
207 posts, read 102,460 times
Reputation: 66
It's your house so your rules.

Honestly I would not allow him over or support this relationship. Dude is a lair and cheater.
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Old 03-17-2017, 11:43 AM
 
Location: Carteret, NJ
190 posts, read 245,726 times
Reputation: 110
Not sure if this is me personally, but I will give my personal opinion.

Yes this is your house and you have some say, but you are talking about a grown adult here (even though she is 20 - she is still an adult). As an adult she can do whatever she wants, which includes her being able to go to her room and hangout with her boyfriend.

It is also true other people still living at home at that age (most people) are allowed to have their boyfriend/girlfriend in their rooms, they can cuddle on the couch, etc. They are grown adults, not middle school or high school.

This is how you end up losing your daughter even if you do not realize it. She would just do that stuff at his house, or secretly wish she had normal parents, or even move out just to do what she wants. Thats how some parents never see it coming because they are close-minded so they dont see any of that coming until it does. If you are open-minded and let her do as she wants like any other adult, then it lessens the chances drastically.
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