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100% agree with this. Wife and I wanted a big family. I already had a career job and we looked at job prospects for my wife and found out her salary would go towards childcare costs. Just wasn't worth it plus she always wanted to be a dedicated mother and wasn't really career oriented. It has worked out very well for us. First child was born eight years ago. Three additional children with the last (def no more) one born four months ago. No way we could have done this with both of us working and four kids in daycare/childcare.
My wife gets those same SAHM comments but only from her mother. Her mother obviously had some powerful (and rich) career in mind for my wife (she is an only child and job hopped to various service jobs most of her life) so I think my wife is seen as a disappointment. Because of that her mother will make snide comments like "you can do xyz because you don't do anything all day" and will criticize and question parenting decisions made (especially when its my wife and she is visiting her mother's house with the kids). Its very disrespectful and it affects my wife but she says this criticizing and put-downs from her mother have been happening my wife's whole life, but that's another story.
I honor and admire you and your wife for rationally arranging your lives for the welfare of your children and for making it practical and pleasant for your wife to engage in one of the highest callings on the planet: personally loving and raising your children. Your MIL is evil and I would limit contact with her. She is obviously projecting her own failure and misery on her daughter, and that is a form of adult child abuse that I wouldn't stand for. But that's another issue.
It's funny because I got so much grief from my mother-in-law about going back to work; she believes that once you have kids, you should stay home until they are adults. Also does not believe in employing babysitters of any kind. Ever. Not even a close relative watching the kids for a few hours so Mom and Dad can have a date night.
Your mother-in-law is correct insofar as you should be personally raising your kids, and not working. However she takes it to an extreme by extending it to babysitters and relatives. That's not rational.
I'm just going to throw this out there but how about everyone just do what they feel is best for their family and not give a Sh** what anyone else thinks. Mind your own business people!!!
Quit trying to make other mothers feel bad about their choices, let's build each other up not tear each other down.
No. Tearing down bad choices is correct and beneficial. Tolerance is overrated these days with all the stupidity running amok.
I honor and admire you and your wife for rationally arranging your lives for the welfare of your children and for making it practical and pleasant for your wife to engage in one of the highest callings on the planet: personally loving and raising your children. Your MIL is evil and I would limit contact with her. She is obviously projecting her own failure and misery on her daughter, and that is a form of adult child abuse that I wouldn't stand for. But that's another issue.
No one gives a crap about your honor. I'd rather not have some one like you on my side. If anyone is projecting, it's you.
No. Tearing down bad choices is correct and beneficial. Tolerance is overrated these days with all the stupidity running amok.
Well, it doesn't look like you changed any minds. It doesn't even look like you made any working mothers feel guilty about their choices. I guess this was a big failure for you. I'm sorry.
Well, it doesn't look like you changed any minds. It doesn't even look like you made any working mothers feel guilty about their choices. I guess this was a big failure for you. I'm sorry.
One would have to believe just another in a long line of failures.
You might want to re-read it. The title was, "Kids of working moms are better off".
You think CNN money conducted the study?
That is the title given to an article that reviewed the study. In fact, the author of the study herself says
""This research doesn't say that children of employed moms are happier or better people and it doesn't say employed moms are better," McGinn told CNNMoney. "What it says is daughters are more likely to be employed and hold supervisory and sons spend more time in the home."
In fact the title of the study is
"Mums the Word! Cross-national Effects of Maternal
Employment on Gender Inequalities at Work and at Home."
Holding the authors of the study to task for the title of an article written by someone else is ridiculous. Not only is it your filter, it is the filter of the journalist and distinctly not that of the study actually being discussed.
Well, it doesn't look like you changed any minds. It doesn't even look like you made any working mothers feel guilty about their choices. I guess this was a big failure for you. I'm sorry.
That was never a possibility or a goal. Lost causes and all, you understand. The younger viewership, however, can read the back and forth, and some of them will make good rational decisions to personally raise their kids. So a few of us will offer that viewpoint, while most will offer yours. They can judge for themselves, and the better ones will make the right decision. And, I must say, the more noble and more difficult decision.
I just don't get it. I am a woman and if I ever had a child I would have to be a working mother. I just think it is too risky to rely on someone else for survival. I would only be comfortable having a baby if I could provide for all my baby's needs. Anything could happen in life. Your spouse or partner can suddenly drop dead, or leave you. I am not knocking stay at home moms. I think everyone should do what they feel is right for themselves and their families. I actually am in awe of women who are comfortable being SAHM's. I am just not one of those people. I just think it is sad some people, mostly religious people, think that working mothers and feminism has ruined the family or society somehow. I think that is ridiculous. I think working to provide for your baby and family is never selfish. I just want some of your perspectives on this topic. honestly not trying to start a flame war. Do you think that babies need at least one parent to stay at home or do you think two working parents is ok?
So instead, you rely on someone else for your innocent babies survival?
No one gives a crap about your honor. I'd rather not have some one like you on my side. If anyone is projecting, it's you.
I'm sure you and his mother-in-law would be fine friends!
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