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Old 05-25-2017, 12:15 PM
 
4,039 posts, read 4,912,930 times
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Go to the counselor and ask for a meeting. We had some things happening in my daughter's class this year and it was done at recess. The counselor got involved and when she couldn't fix it she asked the school psychologist to step in. The psychologist formed the friendship group and they meet once a week. It's been very helpful for all involved.
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Old 05-25-2017, 01:40 PM
 
Location: Living rent free in your head
42,717 posts, read 25,880,492 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sassybluesy View Post
I find it a little odd that the teacher just says "I didn't see it happen." If it's happening on the playground, I'm assuming there's a playground monitor, isn't there? Seems like the teacher could've said "I'll talk to the playground monitor, and ask that he/she keep an eye on both the kids." Or something to that effect.
If you're getting no where with the teacher, maybe have a conversation with the principal?
It happens all the time, in California the new school ratings take points off a school for 'excessive suspensions' so teachers just don't suspend anyone they look the other way. I can't speak for other states but I wouldn't be surprised if they have similar policies.

Personally I would raise hell, go the principal, and if that doesn't do any good go to the superintendent and demand the child be put in a different class, or if that's not possible then a different school. One of my neighbors went through that and got her 6 year old transferred to a different school and he's doing fine now.
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Old 05-25-2017, 01:41 PM
 
Location: Living rent free in your head
42,717 posts, read 25,880,492 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bookspage View Post
"The playground" is the classic defense for teachers
Which is fair, they aren't out there usually
It's the principal's responsibility to maintain order there usually
So escalate to the principal. The superintendent if you have to
My advice is go HARD. No more being nice. Threaten to sue, the police. Everything in writing
Don't call the parents
And don't stress your son out. The bully needs to be stopped by adults. Period
I agree 100% if you don't they will okey doke you until your kid ends up needing a psychologist
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Old 05-25-2017, 02:40 PM
 
5,989 posts, read 6,713,780 times
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School counselor and principal meeting.

Unless he's adopted, it's likely that father is the same. If you knew them, sure, I'd approach them then, gently, but since you don't know them well, go through the school.

The social ostracism caused by this bully will cause your son great pain and damage. I'd move right away on this, and be firm. Demand that they bring in the kid's parents, get him mandatory therapy, that there be constant supervision of him so that he can't victimize others.

And try very, very hard to get your kid some friends in his class. Bullies go after kids who are vulnerable, and kids with friends are far less vulnerable.
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Old 05-25-2017, 03:20 PM
 
Location: Twin Cities
5,833 posts, read 7,656,087 times
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Meet with the principal. If you don't get results there, call the superintendent of
schools. Do not call the other parent directly.
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Old 05-25-2017, 03:37 PM
 
1,065 posts, read 590,893 times
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Invite the bully to your house for dinner and maybe a movie. Make sure the food is good and something he likes. You are going to keep this enemy close and the next time, there is an issue, tell the counselor. Either way, document. And finally go to the school and volunteer. The bully needs to see you, say hello to the bully throughout your day. And if the teacher allows parent observation, do it. The bully needs to know your son is not alone and has support.
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Old 05-25-2017, 05:09 PM
 
Location: Central NJ and PA
5,024 posts, read 2,228,419 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Middletwin View Post
Invite the bully to your house for dinner and maybe a movie. Make sure the food is good and something he likes. You are going to keep this enemy close and the next time, there is an issue, tell the counselor. Either way, document. And finally go to the school and volunteer. The bully needs to see you, say hello to the bully throughout your day. And if the teacher allows parent observation, do it. The bully needs to know your son is not alone and has support.
I love this. Wish I'd gotten this advice a few years ago. For us, my youngest was being picked on, but he hadn't said a word to me. One day, the bully made the mistake of sitting atop my younger boy and biting him, while his brother (20 months older) was in the playground. My older boy is the one that all the kids gravitate toward because he's kind and compassionate, but... he lost it when he saw his little brother on the ground like that. My older one went over and punched the biter in the back and shoulder. We never had a problem again, and it wasn't so much that he'd gotten punched, as it was that he knew someone was watching.


Sadly, my older boy was really upset over the incident; as much because he'd hurt another child on purpose as because his little brother had gotten hurt. If you can show the bully that he's got eyes on him, it would serve pretty much the same purpose. It's good that you know this is happening, too. I wish my son had spoken up.
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Old 05-25-2017, 05:42 PM
 
3,857 posts, read 3,112,122 times
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for real, an honest advice from someone who has been there? tell your son to bop him in the nose and fight. for real, they are kids, and have to have a fight at least once. it is a life lesson. Have your son find a nickname for the bully, and when the bully comes around, and your son say "here comes big head" the bully will get a taste of his own medicine. hit from behind if the kid is bigger.

Also encourage your son to hang out with the bigger kids, possible a big kid that gets bullied as well, but has the presence to kick but. Also show your son to defend other kids that get bullied.

My son has stopped 3 bullies before, and is working on his fourth one this summer. My son has many friends and has become popular with all, because he is nice, righteous, and stands his ground.

report it to your childs teacher as well, and the school in person. Dont confront the parents, but let the school get you guys together. Involve the parents if they are standing right their in the act. If they dont respond, order your kids to kick some butt.
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Old 05-25-2017, 06:22 PM
 
Location: Fort Lauderdale, Florida
11,936 posts, read 12,997,443 times
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Go over the teacher's head and go to the principal.

If that person doesn't resolve this to your liking, go over their head.
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Old 05-25-2017, 06:34 PM
 
Location: Saint John, IN
11,583 posts, read 6,665,944 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ClaraC View Post
I think you need to talk to the principal and the counselor. Since this will be an on-going problem, and won't end at the end of this month, something needs to be done to stem this.

The teacher saying "hmm I don't see it" isn't a sufficient response.

Best wishes.


I agree! Just because the teacher doesn't see it happening, doesn't meant it's not! Go to the principal ASAP and discuss this. If they continue to do nothing than go to the school board. If this other child is doing this in first grade could you imagine how he will be in 5th? Your child should not come home from school crying! If nothing is done that he will start to not want to go to school.
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