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Why do people feel that it's ok to criticize posters like this? I'm reading things like this a lot, and it's just wrong.
If you don't have something constructive to say, don't post.
If the child was wonderful you'd be ready to praise the parents. Guess what same is true for this. They messed up, the friend is asking how to help, but until the parents step up it's not going to get better. Sometimes the truth hurts. I have a child with ASD and I have been working towards his adulthood independence since he was 3.
Its not that easy.
We always thought my autistic brother in law could function on his own with some help from the Gov. Getting the disability and food stamps wasent too hard except for the fact that the Gov made it pretty clear that sooner or later we were going to have to pay for it in one way or another.
But anyhow. He rented a room in a down town area and moved out of his mothers house.
It took all of 2 weeks before someone robbed him and beat him so bad he was in the hospital for 2 months. He got out of the hospital and went back to his room for a month untill the cops beat him up. Back in the hospital after 10 days in jail. Cops beat him up because he wouldnt let them search him. Autistic people dont like others to touch them. This happened twice, then we moved him to another town.
two weeks later the cops in the new town beat him up because a woman called them saying he was playing with himself in front of the local school. We found video that showed him walking down the street then he scratched his ass. I guess scratching your ass is illegal these days.
Moved again out to a relatives house in a bigger city.
3 weeks later he was beat so bad by the cops there that he died. Someone called the cops on him because he was a stranger walking down the street and spending too much time looking at the houses.
Autistic people stand out. They are different. people notice them and think they are strange. They call the cops and cops expect people to react a certain way. Autistic people dont react in a way that people expect. You try to throw one on the ground, they usually fight back.
So, if they want him to live an happy life, keep him at home. Austic people really dont understand the little things in life that you and I take for granted.
He has already been hazed by guys he worked with. He is taken advantage by "friends" and the "wrong" crowd. This is exactly the thing his mother is afraid of. His father just wants him out of the house and on his own.
Just by being in the right place at the right time I befriended a young man, high functioning AS. His traits were lack of eye contact, ADHD, depression, anxiety and sensitive to sensory events. Imagine, going to a doctor, not looking him in the eye and asking for something for the inability to concentrate. He was treated as a drug seeker. This was over 10-15 years ago. Asperger's wasn't something most doctors had been exposed to or trained to recognize.
Any AS adult born in the late 1960's to the late 1980-1990's fell thru the cracks by our medical and educational community). Today, the lucky ones are productive adults and the unlucky feel life failed them, they're in jail or dead by their own hand. In my 40's when I met this man and helped him set up appointments for him with doctors. Another (now current) friend heard that I was helping an "Aspie" (his term) wanted to know if I would talk with him and give him some advice. We became friends (more like adoptive mom - he was finishing college). He was starving for friendship and company and girlfriend advice.
There are hundreds of these folks that were left behind. Most just want someone to talk to, in a world that doesn't know to spot Asperger's. (It's not a disease, you don't "have" Asperger's," or AS. There's no cure. The only reason it's called a disorder by the AMA was so these folks could be helped, but that dx code didn't exist 10 years ago). Next time you meet someone and things are off, try to remember As and have some patience. We have a whole generation that were dismissed and may not even know themselves they could meet the dx of AS (Asperger's Syndrome).
Beautiful!
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