Son is dating very lazy woman and is ruining his life.
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Let your son live the life he wants. In your eyes, maybe this is the stupidest thing one can do, but maybe not in your son's mind.
If you really care about your son, here is what you can do. Talk to him nicely and explain everything to him in term of short term and long term down the road. Make sure he knows what to expect if he stick to his current plan. Once you explain everything, and he acknowledge it, your job is done.
I agree with this. It’s been my policy with my adult children, to state my advice/opinion one time, and then I shut up about it. That way, you have it off your chest, and your son can take it to heart, or not. Truthfully, the son’s mindset was not formed overnight. The fact that he is willing to settle for a woman like this is a whole other subject.
If I were OP, I would also add that I will not be offering housing to them, under any circumstances, if I would be forced to watch his lazy girlfriend lie around all day.
OP, you messed up when you let him AND her move in with you. While it was very nice of you to allow her to stay with you, saying no to her moving in with you probably would have cut her out of the picture before things got to this point.
My son lost his job and he and his girlfriend moved in with me.
OMG Whyyyyyy?????
Did you not raise your children to be independent? People lose their jobs every day and don't come running home to mommy. Take a look in the mirror perhaps.
Did you not raise your children to be independent? People lose their jobs every day and don't come running home to mommy. Take a look in the mirror perhaps.
I don't see a problem with an adult child who is obviously working and clearly TRYING to be responsible in life, but who has temporarily fallen on hard times, coming back home to stay with their parents and regroup. Heck, I've done it before a couple of times in my adult life, and I don't know ANY parent who would refuse to let their child do it, so long as they knew that it was only temporarily and that they were trying to and eventually would get back on their feet. Life happens, and your family should always be there for you when you need them.
The problem is that she let the live-in girlfriend move in to her home with him as well. If mom had not let the girlfriend move in in the first place, then mom's foot would have been put down on the issue from the jump, and her son's foot would have also been put down too by extension, because unless he wanted to be homeless and begging for change on the street, he wasn't going to go against his mom and let this lazy girlfriend make a fool out of him, regardless of HOW smoking hot or great in bed she is.
By letting the son bring the girlfriend move in too, she ENABLED both of them and sent the message early on to her son that he and his lazy girlfriend can do whatever they want together, no matter how reckless, stupid, or irresponsible (basically they took mom's kindness for WEAKNESS), and now it's going to be hard---darn near IMPOSSIBLE---to get him to open his eyes and use the head on his SHOULDERS. At this point, all I can say to mom is, "Good luck!"
he wasn't going to go against his mom and let this lazy girlfriend make a fool out of him, regardless of HOW smoking hot or great in bed she is.
This is a bona fide prostitute
She pays no bills and exchanges sex for money.
This is exactly why I recommended the dude to drop this THOT and head to Brazil or DR.
Many American Men delude themselves into thinking their relationship with these types of whores is ANY DIFFERENT at all from a John in 1970 soliciting a "Working Girl" in TSQ. Stop lying to yourself it's THE SAME THING. Why pay this lazy wench to do nothing but lie flat on her back only to drop you with a child support order 9 months later.
American Men really need to wake the hell up. This is a very common everyday thing. At 27 years old you have nothing. Men can safely sire children with low chance of defects until late 40s. He should not be shacking up period.
Your son is 27. It's time for him to make his own choices, for better or worse. And remember, that lazy woman could end up being the mother of your grandchildren. Zip your lip, play nice and have faith that the man you rise has some common sense.
Have some rep points on me.
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