Moving back to my Ex's town (divorced, baby, son, married)
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So my ex and I have a son, and we are VERY amicable.
I moved away four years ago and got remarried, we have anew baby.
Now, I want to move back (hey, it's my hometown too!) But being away from my ex my new husband has had the chance to really build a fatherly role for my son. My son still sees his dad in the Summer and any holiday he is available - but he's not a full time dad - a role model (although he's a very good guy, he's just very busy with work and self centered)
So I want to move back and we are looking for a new house there - but I worry my husband will lose the father/head of household role if we are closer to my ex. Because I'm sure my ex will want more time with his son.
Right now our family dynamic is great - I'm worried it will deteriorate with living near my ex.
Your sons relationship with your husband wont change any. He will still be a role model in your sons life and will still be the HEAD of YOUR household (as he is.)
For your son i bet it would be even better getting to see his father more often.
Sounds like a win win situation here.
Is your husband worried or something? Its nice that he loves your son, but he does need to understand that he's not his father. Both relationships are important but i dont see it changing just because he'll get to see his father more.
Well when I divorced I relocated 3.5 hours away. My ex see's our daughter 1-2 weekends a month, 2-3 weeks in the summer, alternating holidays and we try to arange weekends to be long weekends whenever possible. My kids are used to this arangement and I think it's been pretty good for them.
You're right it's your hometown too and if you want to move back, why not. I understand your concern but wonder... What does your husband feel about it? Also how about the child with your ex, does he show desires of wishing for more time with his biological father?
From what you described, if the ex is self-centered and works a lot of hours, yes living closer to him may mean a bit more time spent between him and your child together but maybe not that much to really worry about. Sure things like every other weekend would work out where he gets more time with the child yet the disruption to your current family structure won't be too great either.
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