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Should the parents meddle if everything else like school & homework, clubs, social life isn't impacted by the game playing?
I would say no, the parent shouldn't meddle if that is the case. The child in that hypothetical has clearly learned how to manage their time and balance priorities. Isn't that what most parents would desire?
You calling him anti-social. Sounds like your judging him or you have something against video-games yourself. I mean what do you do for a living asides make his dad happy the same way his mother did after dark?
The way I see it he is already grown and sending him away to complete his high-school years or even away to college is the best route. However you could also send him without his phone or electronic devices and claim he needs to study. You need to get him away from electronic devices period. Find a logical course of action.
However I doubt you have the courage to do so. Especially since he is not your biological son. Many people do not live up to the standards of the real parents as well. That being said it sounds like he is disconnected from his father period.
Teach him how to go out with girls at bars and restaurants. So he can be a frisky bachelor and all? Tell him that it is okay to bring girls home with him and leave in the morning. Get him in the idea that girl = money = happiness
For me? It was 10. I'm 30, now, but the last video game systems I had were the first Xbox and the PS2. In middle school I made friends and began to play music, eventually we had a band by high school.
Settled into a full time job within a year after graduation and never looked back. I just don't see the use.
He gets good grades, he is involved with some clubs @ school so my husband doesn't really do anything about the gaming b/c he doesn't feel like it is interfering in my stepson's life … but I feel like @ a certain point, don't they become too old to be gaming all the time?
The thing I do not like, is that while yes, he does take involvement in the school and has friends, any time he is home he is gaming. If we want to do something as a family, he will either not come or he will come and just play on his handheld device/phone the entire time.
My husband's family is not here, so all holidays are spent with mine. He will come to the holiday and then be antisocial and sit in a corner playing his games. I think that @ 16, he could be sociable with the adults ... but he isn't my son so I stay out of it …
I mean, I just have visions of him going to college & STILL gaming. Is 16 beyond the point of growing out of it?
I don't think it is about growing out of it.
Your son's issue isn't about age-appropriate activities. People can enjoy games at any age.
It's about having a problem with games.
May be an addiction.
If he does this all the time he is at home or avoids family time and activity, he has A PROBLEM, not a hobby.
Should the parents meddle if everything else like school & homework, clubs, social life isn't impacted by the game playing?
When you're out of my house, your time management is none of my business.
While I am paying for your life and responsible for guiding you, activities that don't serve the purpose of improving you somehow (does it make you stronger/wiser/a better person?) will be limited.
Imaginative play is good for you. Free time. Down time.
When you're out of my house, your time management is none of my business.
While I am paying for your life and responsible for guiding you, activities that don't serve the purpose of improving you somehow (does it make you stronger/wiser/a better person?) will be limited.
Imaginative play is good for you. Free time. Down time.
Moderation is key.
Hopefully people will understand this enough to put down the games when they enter adulthood.
Games today aren't something you pick up for 20 minutes a day and put it down. There are some levels that take hours to complete and you have no option to pause or save. You'd just start the same thing over and over again because you never complete it. Groundhog Day. Most people who subscribe to Xbox live or the PS network are on their systems for hours a day, every day. It's unhealthy to go full bore like that, but pointless for a casual gamer to compete because they'll always be the least practiced person there.
I understand if you want to use part of your summer vacation to completely run a game through and feel accomplished. But doing it competitively takes up so much of real life, and the multiplayer online games that are made today don't allow for occasional gamers. It's just not part of the equation. So unless you're into playing Wii Sports or Tetris or Dr. Mario (throwback!!!) it's best to find better uses for your time.
There are 70+ yr olds that play games on their phones, tablets, etc. Whether they play solitair, on line poker, a game app, etc.
I equate it to a hobby so think it is fine. If he were not playing video games he would be doing something else that lessens his engagement with family. He's 16. He will re-engage in his early 30's.
I will not render an opinion on what you should do - it is your kid and you are the parent so are in the best position to decide (assuming you're not loopy). I can speak for myself and say that it is nothing I would pull him away from. Maybe have him put down the controller for a family dinner or outing here and there but not anything too crazy. I would let him unwind, let him have his hobby. Gosh, maybe even learn a little about whatever game he is into and engage him with it so you can connect rather than pulling it away from him. I was never a sports or car person but my kid likes them so I learned about things so we can bond and talk about his interests. I don't think this is very different.
Gaming is a lot of fun. There's no need to grow out of it. The key is moderation. As long as the person isn't neglecting their duties, whatever they may be, then it's fine. The gaming industry has changed dramatically since the 80's and no longer targets kids exclusively. The buying power lies with the adult demographic.
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