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Old 11-01-2019, 05:47 AM
 
Location: NJ
637 posts, read 213,535 times
Reputation: 2466

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I would have given her a break on the chores. In theory, yes we are all accountable to helping out around our homes. And adults who go to work still have to clean up at home. But a student with a part time job and chores is the equivalent of a 16 year old working full time and working part and still has to devote an hour or more to homework plus do chores. thats asking A LOT
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Old 11-05-2019, 04:01 PM
 
Location: North Idaho
23,747 posts, read 30,507,223 times
Reputation: 47414
Quote:
Originally Posted by BirdieBelle View Post
How did you punish her??

She took her job away from her.
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Old 11-05-2019, 04:38 PM
 
12,795 posts, read 5,121,780 times
Reputation: 31082
Quote:
Originally Posted by MillennialUrbanist View Post
If you think about it, adults CAN do only the chores they feel like doing. If you don't believe me, look at my apartment. It looks presentable, but far from the spotless cleanliness I was required to maintain my room as a kid. So what say you?
That is SO TRUE. So many people say "well, when you get out in the real world bla bla bla" but in reality, it's easier to be an adult.

You get to pick where to work and where to live and who to spend time with. You get to pick which chores you do - you can certainly put the laundry off another day or only do a half load - and you can not empty your dishwasher but just use dishes right out of the machine. And hardly ever wash your car and put off grocery shopping another day by stopping by Subway on the way home.

And if you're late with a work assignment, a little forewarning to the boss or the customer usually works out just fine. You can negotiate it. You don't get a zero for late work.
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Old 11-05-2019, 05:21 PM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
46,164 posts, read 44,502,910 times
Reputation: 90260
Quote:
Originally Posted by oregonwoodsmoke View Post
She took her job away from her.
Didn't fit the crime.
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Old 11-06-2019, 11:19 AM
Status: "John 16:33" (set 27 days ago)
 
4,448 posts, read 3,566,186 times
Reputation: 6085
Am I the only one wondering why the OP agreed to her daughter working at a job 9 miles from home?
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Old 11-07-2019, 09:30 AM
 
48 posts, read 7,714 times
Reputation: 63
Quote:
Originally Posted by calgirlinnc View Post
Am I the only one wondering why the OP agreed to her daughter working at a job 9 miles from home?
She applied without us even knowing ...

then got the job ...


Then we gave rides happily ...


Until she started yelling, and screaming, and slamming doors in the house until they break, and yes... also stopped doing chores...


why is everyone leaving out / ignoring the fact there is a broken door in the house from being slammed, and she was yelling and screaming at her parents ?

Why is this painted as she skipped trash one day, so I fired her ??
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Old 11-07-2019, 09:39 AM
 
10,387 posts, read 14,075,982 times
Reputation: 6535
Quote:
Originally Posted by YorktownGal View Post
Not working now. Since her mother refused to drive her 9 miles to work, she was fired.
I wouldn't drive a teen 9 miles to work either. There's nowhere closer she can work? 9 miles is far for a parent (who likely also works).


I'm waiting for my 16 y/o to get a job. Anywhere he can bike to is where he is able to look for work. He's a very good kid, it's just that us driving him to work would be impossible since my husband and I are gone from 7a - 8p.


So my kiddo knows getting around during the week is on him.
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Old 11-07-2019, 10:09 AM
 
Location: Connecticut
936 posts, read 215,094 times
Reputation: 1017
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jdawg8181 View Post
I wouldn't drive a teen 9 miles to work either. There's nowhere closer she can work? 9 miles is far for a parent (who likely also works).


I'm waiting for my 16 y/o to get a job. Anywhere he can bike to is where he is able to look for work. He's a very good kid, it's just that us driving him to work would be impossible since my husband and I are gone from 7a - 8p.


So my kiddo knows getting around during the week is on him.



The miles are irrelevant. What matters, is that this "parent," felt the appropriate punishment was to not take her daughter to work, which resulted in her getting fired. Not the way to go about it. Maybe she could've gotten a feel for the actual distance of the commute and could've looked into other options in terms of getting there. Or she could've kept applying to other places while she worked at said job and then give her two weeks notice once something that was closer came along. It's hard for teens to get jobs as it is because most places don't care to hire them due to the lack of inexperience and maturity. She probably applied to Mc Donald's because it's one of the easiest jobs to get as a teenager.
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Old 11-07-2019, 10:13 AM
 
Location: Connecticut
936 posts, read 215,094 times
Reputation: 1017
Quote:
Originally Posted by confusedparent1 View Post
She applied without us even knowing ...

then got the job ...


Then we gave rides happily ...


Until she started yelling, and screaming, and slamming doors in the house until they break, and yes... also stopped doing chores...


why is everyone leaving out / ignoring the fact there is a broken door in the house from being slammed, and she was yelling and screaming at her parents ?

Why is this painted as she skipped trash one day, so I fired her ??



No one is saying her behavior is acceptable. It's because you picked the wrong tool to punish her with. You're going to look even more foolish when you have the parental conversation of how important it is to work and earn a paycheck, take pride in your work, find a career you love, etc. Your daughter is going to instantly remember that you allowed to get her fired by not bringing her. You seriously couldn't have picked a different punishment? Like gee, I don't know, maybe grounding her and not allowing her to hangout with her friends? Or no TV time and no Internet? And get over the whole chores thing. Once I started working, I barely did my chores either. My Dad and I talked about it, and he agreed between school and working two jobs during my senior year of high school left me with no time to do said chores.



Also, have you had a chance to sit down and talk to her to see why she has been so angry lately? There might be something going on in her life that she is having trouble handing, so she's getting angry because of it. Sit down with her and get to the root of them problem already!
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Old 11-07-2019, 10:31 AM
 
Location: Middle of the ocean
33,650 posts, read 21,338,536 times
Reputation: 48886
Quote:
Originally Posted by DK736 View Post
No one is saying her behavior is acceptable. It's because you picked the wrong tool to punish her with. You're going to look even more foolish when you have the parental conversation of how important it is to work and earn a paycheck, take pride in your work, find a career you love, etc. Your daughter is going to instantly remember that you allowed to get her fired by not bringing her. You seriously couldn't have picked a different punishment? Like gee, I don't know, maybe grounding her and not allowing her to hangout with her friends? Or no TV time and no Internet? And get over the whole chores thing. Once I started working, I barely did my chores either. My Dad and I talked about it, and he agreed between school and working two jobs during my senior year of high school left me with no time to do said chores.



Also, have you had a chance to sit down and talk to her to see why she has been so angry lately? There might be something going on in her life that she is having trouble handing, so she's getting angry because of it. Sit down with her and get to the root of them problem already!


Well said!!!
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