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Old 12-31-2019, 11:05 AM
 
1,936 posts, read 2,122,429 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CGQ View Post
My 6 year old son told me last night the he wanted to marry his younger sister. I told him he couldn’t marry anyone in his family. He would have to choose a girl or boy outside of his family. He said he wanted to marry a boy. When I asked him about this again in the morning, he got excited and said yes, I want to marry a boy. I asked him if he wanted to hold hands and kiss boys. He looked puzzled and said „no“. I asked the same about girls. He got kiddy and said “No!”. I then asked what made him think he would want to marry a boy and he said he didn’t know what made him think that. I told him it’s okay he doesn’t know, yet. And once he figured it out I would love him all the Same, either way.

Does anyone have any experience with this? My son is mostly interested in typical boy things... dinosaurs, science and nature, playing ninja, digging in the dirt.. He chooses to dress in a typical boy style, as well. He’s currently in a phase where he has little interest in playing with girls... most of his friends are boys. So his Response did surprise me.

My question is, is it typical for children his age to have thoughts like these? I am trying to figure out whether I need to talk to him some more to make sure he never feels like there is anything wrong with him, if he is gay. But if that’s the case I also don’t want to push him too far and make him feel uncomfortable. Or is this just innocent talk of 6 year old who is learning about the different ways people love each other and I should just take it lightly and drop it?
I think this is an example of experiencing the innocence of a child. Sexual orientation is not in any way a “learned” behavior the way some others would have you believe. Hate, however, is a learned behavior. If your son continues to elaborate on marriage, you can just explain that while most people prefer to marry a member of opposite sex, some prefer to marry a member of the same sex, and leave it at that. A 6 year old usually won’t expect any more explanation than that.
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Old 12-31-2019, 02:09 PM
 
223 posts, read 74,860 times
Reputation: 1123
I would've never thought to mention to my son that her could marry another boy.
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Old 12-31-2019, 02:55 PM
 
Location: Northern Ca
510 posts, read 142,524 times
Reputation: 837
Quote:
Originally Posted by CGQ View Post
My 6 year old son told me last night the he wanted to marry his younger sister. I told him he couldn’t marry anyone in his family. He would have to choose a girl or boy outside of his family. He said he wanted to marry a boy. When I asked him about this again in the morning, he got excited and said yes, I want to marry a boy. I asked him if he wanted to hold hands and kiss boys. He looked puzzled and said „no“. I asked the same about girls. He got kiddy and said “No!”. I then asked what made him think he would want to marry a boy and he said he didn’t know what made him think that. I told him it’s okay he doesn’t know, yet. And once he figured it out I would love him all the Same, either way.

Does anyone have any experience with this? My son is mostly interested in typical boy things... dinosaurs, science and nature, playing ninja, digging in the dirt.. He chooses to dress in a typical boy style, as well. He’s currently in a phase where he has little interest in playing with girls... most of his friends are boys. So his Response did surprise me.

My question is, is it typical for children his age to have thoughts like these? I am trying to figure out whether I need to talk to him some more to make sure he never feels like there is anything wrong with him, if he is gay. But if that’s the case I also don’t want to push him too far and make him feel uncomfortable. Or is this just innocent talk of 6 year old who is learning about the different ways people love each other and I should just take it lightly and drop it?
Experience with what?
You cannot seriously be calling a 6 yr old gay?
Please just let him be a kid and quit comparing him to others.
Nothing is normal, everyone is unique.
Keep your "critique's and "support" to yourself
Please keep your mind out of the gutter for his sake.
He's only 6 yrs old!!!
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Old 12-31-2019, 02:59 PM
 
Location: Northern Ca
510 posts, read 142,524 times
Reputation: 837
Quote:
Originally Posted by BirdieBelle View Post
The things kids say don't always mean what we think they do.

You're jumping off on the gay tangent when he 1) doesn't know what sex is, and 2) doesn't know what gay is.

That's why it's best to let kids lead these kinds of conversations, and just ask questions that follow up on what they've already said, not introduce new concepts to the conversation. If a little girl says, "What if I don't want to marry a boy?" it's best to ask her who she would want to marry instead of assuming she's talking about homosexuality because she might just say she wants to marry chocolate.
Exactly.

It's so strange an adult doesn't understand the level of a 6 yr old
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Old 12-31-2019, 06:42 PM
 
5,541 posts, read 7,533,594 times
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I think feeling one is the 'wrong' gender can happen at that age, but sexual orientation not so much because most people do not have much sexual awareness or development yet at that age. When you asked him who he wants to marry, his concept of marriage may not yet be well-formed and is very unlikely to involve any sort of sexual or romantic feelings. Thus, his answer should not be understood in that light, most likely.
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Old 12-31-2019, 07:48 PM
 
11,121 posts, read 6,786,177 times
Reputation: 9371
Quote:
Originally Posted by CGQ View Post
My 6 year old son told me last night the he wanted to marry his younger sister. I told him he couldn’t marry anyone in his family. He would have to choose a girl or boy outside of his family. He said he wanted to marry a boy. When I asked him about this again in the morning, he got excited and said yes, I want to marry a boy. I asked him if he wanted to hold hands and kiss boys. He looked puzzled and said „no“. I asked the same about girls. He got kiddy and said “No!”. I then asked what made him think he would want to marry a boy and he said he didn’t know what made him think that. I told him it’s okay he doesn’t know, yet. And once he figured it out I would love him all the Same, either way.

Does anyone have any experience with this? My son is mostly interested in typical boy things... dinosaurs, science and nature, playing ninja, digging in the dirt.. He chooses to dress in a typical boy style, as well. He’s currently in a phase where he has little interest in playing with girls... most of his friends are boys. So his Response did surprise me.

My question is, is it typical for children his age to have thoughts like these? I am trying to figure out whether I need to talk to him some more to make sure he never feels like there is anything wrong with him, if he is gay. But if that’s the case I also don’t want to push him too far and make him feel uncomfortable. Or is this just innocent talk of 6 year old who is learning about the different ways people love each other and I should just take it lightly and drop it?
Why are you asking him all these questions? You are the one making this a big deal. He originally said he wanted to marry his sister, that's cute and nothing more. They just have thoughts about things in their comfortable little world. For instance, it's common for both boys and girls to want to be a mommy (they love her after all). One of mine wanted to be a dog, I didn't start looking at obedience schools. Just let him be a kid.
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Old 12-31-2019, 07:57 PM
 
Location: Crook County, Illinois
4,110 posts, read 1,870,804 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by otowi View Post
I think feeling one is the 'wrong' gender can happen at that age, but sexual orientation not so much because most people do not have much sexual awareness or development yet at that age. When you asked him who he wants to marry, his concept of marriage may not yet be well-formed and is very unlikely to involve any sort of sexual or romantic feelings. Thus, his answer should not be understood in that light, most likely.
Yes, precisely. Age 6 thru 11 to 13 is when sexual interest is virtually nonexistent. That's when kids interact mostly with members of the same sex, and the opposite sex has cooties. Sigmund Freud called that age "latent stage" for a reason. OP, let the poor kid be. Have him worry about Pokemon Go or whatever kids play nowadays, rather than getting married and what-have-you. As well as what it means to be man, in healthy, appropriate ways. And be glad he plays with physical toys, rather than yet another iPhone app.
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Old 01-01-2020, 07:52 AM
 
18,908 posts, read 24,365,296 times
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I Wanted to be superman at 6 yrs old......and fly

what we consider marriage and what their perception is ….is two different worlds....

best friends at that age..... either gender ….will say they want to be "married"


I don't think the response you got has anything to do with gender.....orientation..





for me...let kids be kids...let them have some Christmas magic.....let them believe in the tooth faery … let them use their imaginations or fantasize.....
its us adults that usually put adult terms in things …and make it something it isn't

I do believe as adults …..and im saying this to woman....lay off the "little princesses" "what a beautiful girl" what a little angel" I had twin friends growing up...….boy/girl and the girl got all the attention based on her looks.... so guess what?? her brother was jealous of the attention and the little princess …. thought she could always get her way based on how she looked....

I still see this today …… more adults...mostly older woman will comment on the girls' looks and ask the boy if he's in sports or what hobby's does he like??????

you combine this attention with mostly female teachers that favor the girls. in elementary school........then yes ...some boys are thinking im better off being a girl...…..sound foolish???? I hope it is....


I never gave above a second thought until a couple lady friends had said that's what happened to them and as...young kids....and teenagers their "worth" was mostly based on their looks … and both said it was mostly influenced by women in their family......both hated the phrase little beauty or little angel...or little princess
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Old 01-01-2020, 10:01 AM
 
Location: Nebraska
4,359 posts, read 7,452,950 times
Reputation: 7021
Quote:
Originally Posted by CGQ View Post
My 6 year old son told me last night the he wanted to marry his younger sister. I told him he couldn’t marry anyone in his family. He would have to choose a girl or boy outside of his family. He said he wanted to marry a boy. When I asked him about this again in the morning, he got excited and said yes, I want to marry a boy. I asked him if he wanted to hold hands and kiss boys. He looked puzzled and said „no“. I asked the same about girls. He got kiddy and said “No!”. I then asked what made him think he would want to marry a boy and he said he didn’t know what made him think that. I told him it’s okay he doesn’t know, yet. And once he figured it out I would love him all the Same, either way.

Does anyone have any experience with this? My son is mostly interested in typical boy things... dinosaurs, science and nature, playing ninja, digging in the dirt.. He chooses to dress in a typical boy style, as well. He’s currently in a phase where he has little interest in playing with girls... most of his friends are boys. So his Response did surprise me.

My question is, is it typical for children his age to have thoughts like these? I am trying to figure out whether I need to talk to him some more to make sure he never feels like there is anything wrong with him, if he is gay. But if that’s the case I also don’t want to push him too far and make him feel uncomfortable. Or is this just innocent talk of 6 year old who is learning about the different ways people love each other and I should just take it lightly and drop it?
Your son sounds NORMAL. What kind of MORAL codes is he being exposed to? What are your real feelings on the topic? Do you believe in SIN? Is there such a thing as SIN? Who decides?

Now that he is six it will be mandatory, by the state, that he attend school . When that happens if He does not have a MORAL code to live by you will no longer be the ONLY influence in his life. In fact your influence may be over written by his teachers and his peers.
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Old 01-01-2020, 01:50 PM
 
10,308 posts, read 2,980,271 times
Reputation: 6616
Quote:
Originally Posted by CGQ View Post
My 6 year old son told me last night the he wanted to marry his younger sister. I told him he couldn’t marry anyone in his family. He would have to choose a girl or boy outside of his family. He said he wanted to marry a boy. When I asked him about this again in the morning, he got excited and said yes, I want to marry a boy. I asked him if he wanted to hold hands and kiss boys. He looked puzzled and said „no“. I asked the same about girls. He got kiddy and said “No!”. I then asked what made him think he would want to marry a boy and he said he didn’t know what made him think that. I told him it’s okay he doesn’t know, yet. And once he figured it out I would love him all the Same, either way.

Does anyone have any experience with this?
Yes. I was 6 once. His statements mean nothing.
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