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Old Yesterday, 10:05 AM
 
966 posts, read 252,054 times
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This is not how I’d want my child to be living but I’m not sure I’d be worried about a 4 year old having privacy, that’s the least of your worries. Kids are resilient, she most likely will barely remember this but as others have said you need a lawyer.
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Old Yesterday, 12:41 PM
 
2,271 posts, read 2,677,863 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Toxic Waltz View Post
OP I think maybe if you press this too hard you may find that you no longer have a 50/50 arrangement anymore and your daughter will be worse off than she is now, especially if you press this without a lawyer. Get a lawyer, get your custody arrangement formalized now, and then, with your lawyer's advice, explore your next step options. Until then concentrate on providing your daughter with the best environment possible for the time that you do have her.
I brought up my concerns with my ex and she said she will start having our daughter sleep in the room with her mother. I won't make it a big deal, unless I find out she is still sleeping on the couch.
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Old Yesterday, 12:44 PM
 
2,271 posts, read 2,677,863 times
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Originally Posted by Sassybluesy View Post
Question...where would you have your ex go? I'm assuming if she could afford someplace else, she'd GO someplace else. Remember...your ex, (probably more so than your daughter) would probably prefer more privacy too. Just as much as you would prefer it.


So...what should she do?
That sounds like a solution that only an adult can figure out. My ex wanted to leave to gain her independence. So she left. It is not my job to figure out her situation. Besides, my ex makes more money than I do, surely if I can afford to live on my own, than so can she.
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Old Yesterday, 12:46 PM
 
2,271 posts, read 2,677,863 times
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Originally Posted by oh-eve View Post
I second this. In my area there are often 10-15 people in a 3 bedroom house. Not unusual in areas where rent is expensive.

How much privacy does a 4 year old need and for what?
Jesus, it is not so much a privacy issue as it is an issue of my daughter getting the sleep she needs. 4 year olds need around 12 hours of sleep per night. If my daughter is constantly having her sleep interrupted, wouldn't that be an issue?
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Old Yesterday, 12:49 PM
 
2,271 posts, read 2,677,863 times
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Originally Posted by BirdieBelle View Post
So you two don't have a formal, court-approved custody agreement?
No we don't.
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Old Today, 07:58 AM
 
Location: Loudon, TN
6,582 posts, read 5,340,525 times
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You really should seek a written agreement with regard to custody arrangements, whether it's through a lawyer or a mediator, or the courts.

Speaking from my own experience, my first husband's ex was fine with him having visitation with his 2 year old son, until I arrived (as the new girlfriend). Then she went psycho. She literally snatched her son out of a restaurant in the middle of visitation and drove off with him. Then she did everything in her power, including moving with no forwarding address, refusing child support, and eventually taking the child out of state to avoid the police. She prevented my ex from seeing his child for the next 9 years.
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Old Today, 12:55 PM
 
Location: NJ
12,117 posts, read 22,255,561 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jaredC View Post
Jesus, it is not so much a privacy issue as it is an issue of my daughter getting the sleep she needs. 4 year olds need around 12 hours of sleep per night. If my daughter is constantly having her sleep interrupted, wouldn't that be an issue?
You have no clue how much sleep she would get if she was in an apartment with mom. My daughter used to let my grandson stay up till 11:30 at that age. All you can control is what she does in your own home
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