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Old 02-13-2020, 12:10 AM
 
Location: Mid-Atlantic
27,892 posts, read 26,498,578 times
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My mom was an A+ to a B when she was "normal." Once in a while a C, but whatever. She had serious emotional issues and would take a swan dive into the deep end periodically.

Dad was a very loving, kind man, but he didn't stop her from hurting us. I don't think that he really understood what was going on.
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Old 02-15-2020, 08:52 PM
 
1,626 posts, read 1,267,287 times
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A solid A, I couldn’t have asked for better. I can only hope I’ve done as good of a job.
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Old 02-16-2020, 06:05 AM
 
237 posts, read 53,344 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ccc123 View Post
A solid A, I couldn’t have asked for better. I can only hope I’ve done as good of a job.
You're lucky
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Old 02-16-2020, 08:27 AM
 
8,484 posts, read 12,475,027 times
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A for effort and intentions, B- for results.

My parents are well educated 1st generation immigrants.

Most of their focus was on education to get me into a good school (which happened) and into a well paid career. In retrospect, that mentality went against my internal instincts. I'm more of a laidback guy who cares about liking the job or the mission. Granted that was a long time ago, but what they instilled in me has hindered me.

Socially and dating wise, it would have been bad for me no matter how good of a job they did, but they didn't help.

They also refused to buy me a guitar when I was a teen because the piano didn't take. That ended up being a really big mistake because I picked it up later, became obsessed with it, and still am.

That said, they always just wanted the best for me, they just did not understand that they world I was in was a different one from the one they grew up in.

They are still great parents today and they get an A overall.
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Old 02-16-2020, 08:47 AM
 
3,227 posts, read 3,232,679 times
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Raised by wolves until the age of 14 when my father died. Thrown to the wolves after that when my mother quit being a mother. She finally admitted at the age of 83 that she never thought about how my father's death would affect me and my sister. There was no real apology, just an admission of egotism. I grew up repeating the mantras, "That which does not kill me makes me stronger" and "Hardship builds character." My sister and I have a lot of character.
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Old 02-16-2020, 09:03 AM
 
Location: North Dakota
8,166 posts, read 9,836,903 times
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The good:
I was never neglected and always had my needs met.
I always knew they cared about me.
They instilled a sense of responsibility.

The bad:
Lots of double standards. My brother was allowed to do what he wanted when he wanted, then later on this applied with my step siblings.
VERY unrealistic about how I should live. I was expected to either be constantly entertained when I wasn't in school or sports or constantly working. The double standard above applied. From the age of 30 until 33 the constant entertainment obsession made a reappearance.

I guess overall I'd give my parents a B. They were young and did their best. I don't resent my mom for any of it but the double standards thing is still alive and well with my dad and step siblings.
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