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Old 02-17-2020, 09:58 AM
 
Location: State of Transition
84,211 posts, read 77,210,637 times
Reputation: 85152

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Quote:
Originally Posted by adams_aj View Post
Those eggs are pretty close to their "sell-by" date. I hope all goes well.
Plenty of women have kids at 40 and beyond, and they come out healthy. Having kids later in life, at around 40 and into the early 40's, was actually a thing for awhile back in the 80's, that got media coverage. There were no problems reported.
I've come across two women on my path through life, who had kids naturally (no hormonal or other help) at 50 (one of the women), and the other was 51. No problems, healthy, happy babies. Both of them were on their 2nd marriage at that point, to guys about 15 years younger. Both of them looked really young for their age.

Of course, I wouldn't recommend women at 50 try pregnancy, but both of these were women who thrived on the hormonal cocktail their bodies produced during pregnancy. Not everyone has such a blissful time of it.

 
Old 02-17-2020, 10:15 AM
 
Location: STL area
1,304 posts, read 654,220 times
Reputation: 2744
The risks are higher than 10 years earlier, for sure, but it's really none of your business. Even at higher risk, she's more likely to have a "healthy" baby than not. FWIW, I know someone in her early 30s who recently had a baby with Down Syndrome and that baby is healthy, adorable, and wonderful. Not really something to think is the end of the world.
 
Old 02-17-2020, 10:19 AM
 
Location: Southwest Washington State
26,294 posts, read 16,937,831 times
Reputation: 39952
As an older mother, she might be given some extra support through her pregnancy. She might be at risk for complications. She might also not be at risk. But she is getting good care, and that makes the odds of having a healthy baby greater.

The young age of the father is in her favor as well.

Otherwise, this does not sound like it is your business, unless she is seeking your emotional support. Be happy for her and think positive thoughts. It sounds as if she is happy. Late motherhood is much more common now.
 
Old 02-17-2020, 02:19 PM
 
554 posts, read 124,743 times
Reputation: 1497
Quote:
Originally Posted by LilLisa83 View Post
Why do you care? Nosey. Why not just ask a doctor? It's just weird you have so much interest in something that doesn't concern you....
I agree. This is nobody else's business.

And so what if there is an 11 year age difference. Who cares.
 
Old 02-17-2020, 08:33 PM
 
14,149 posts, read 14,762,414 times
Reputation: 41972
I'm 43. This is like my worst nightmare. But your cousin is clearly happy with this turn of events. Go with that. Support her happiness. I have a second cousin who had a kid at 46 - she walked down the aisle at her oldest son's graduation with a ginormous belly! That fetus is now a full-grown man with a kid of his own.

This is a joyous thing. Stop worrying about things that are not yours to worry about and step up for your cousin.
 
Old 02-18-2020, 07:34 AM
 
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
38,165 posts, read 27,832,606 times
Reputation: 35416
41 is on the younger side of women I've known to have kids the past few years. Good for her!
 
Old 02-18-2020, 07:37 AM
 
Location: Canada
6,315 posts, read 4,752,093 times
Reputation: 17504
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bridge781 View Post
People’s bodies work differently. It’s certainly very possible to get pregnant at 41 and have a healthy baby.

The situation itself doesn’t sound great if you want honest opinions. People seem to think just because a woman is older that it doesn’t matter if she’s married or not but it still will affect the child depending on what happens. A 41 yr old woman being with a 28 yr old guy seems like a stretch, it’s unusual for sure and makes me wonder if this will last. When he’s 37 and she’s 50 I’d be curious to know if they’re still together. Sounds like a friends with benefits situation gone wild. I’m 41 and couldn’t imagine marrying a 28 yr old man. Just very different places in life.

Overall it never seems like a great situation to get pregnant when it’s unplanned and you’re not married. Doesn’t mean it will be a horrible situation but all you can do is wish them luck.
The thing I would find hard about all this, is having to deal with a teenager in my 50's. It was hard enough dealing with two teen boys when I was in my 40's. No wonder our hair turns grey lol

As for the guy being younger, if they love each other, it should work.
 
Old 02-18-2020, 08:23 AM
 
6,404 posts, read 2,727,659 times
Reputation: 5368
my grandmother had my aunt when she was 50. My aunt is 73 years old now and works full time for USPS.
 
Old 02-18-2020, 08:53 AM
 
Location: Camberville
12,767 posts, read 17,628,471 times
Reputation: 21561
I know more people who have had children in their 40s than in their 20s, to the point where hearing about people having children in their 20s is a real shock.



Risks are higher, sure, but there are plenty of other factors that one could have that makes their risk higher.
 
Old 02-18-2020, 09:18 AM
 
2,009 posts, read 578,465 times
Reputation: 1541
I think the issue for me is not that she is 41 but that it’s a 41 yr old woman with a 28 yr old man. It ain’t gonna last but baby will likely be fine.
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