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Old 02-21-2020, 09:29 AM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
48,515 posts, read 46,777,539 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by OutdoorsExplorer View Post

THATS IT !
So have you talked to her about it since yesterday?
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Old 02-21-2020, 11:24 AM
 
12 posts, read 4,285 times
Reputation: 38
Talked to her about it ? Sure.

Punished her, no.

the general consensus seems to be a cell phone is not a toy to be taken away, but rather a tool used for real life, to do schoolwork (not sure how ?) and safety. ( not sure how everyone didn't die in the 70's before cell phones)

I gave her both phone back after she cleaned the bathroom ... Not sure what else to do ..
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Old 02-21-2020, 11:44 AM
Status: "The ministers cat is an exhausted cat" (set 24 days ago)
 
Location: NJ
1,058 posts, read 363,411 times
Reputation: 3606
Quote:
Originally Posted by OutdoorsExplorer View Post
Talked to her about it ? Sure.

Punished her, no.

the general consensus seems to be a cell phone is not a toy to be taken away, but rather a tool used for real life, to do schoolwork (not sure how ?) and safety. ( not sure how everyone didn't die in the 70's before cell phones)

I gave her both phone back after she cleaned the bathroom ... Not sure what else to do ..
There are other punishments you may need to enact if she continues to break rules but phones are different than they used to be. Yes they are for school work, she interfaces with her friends, watches youtube tutorials for math problems, emails her teachers and in some cases could even be doing classwork remotely. People without access to phones to contact emergency services in the event of an accident DID die sometimes, due to not being able to access help. In the 70's people also had access to payphones if they got stranded, ran out of money or got into trouble. Now they dont. People would have possibly opened the door if a neighborhood kid asked to use the phone, now people dont even know the neighborhood kids and definitely arent opening the door, so yes for safety. It also helps YOU keep track of her and check in with her.
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Old 02-21-2020, 11:54 AM
 
Location: Raleigh
9,659 posts, read 7,234,624 times
Reputation: 13633
Quote:
Originally Posted by RamenAddict View Post
I find this hard to believe. Most people deactivate any phones they aren’t using and limit who can activate any new/additional phones. Typically you have to know the last 4 of the SSN of the account holder to activate a different phone or go to the store and be authorized to get a new phone. Who would pay for a phone number they are not using?

You can’t just throw a phone in the garbage due to the battery- you have to take it to some place that does electronics recycling.
1...I find it easy to believe, especially if she just uses wifi and various apps for connectivity. And most folks just throw them in the trash, even if they should send them somewhere that does electronics recycling. It isn't as if the garbage men comb through your trash looking for prohibited items.
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Old 02-21-2020, 11:58 AM
 
Location: Raleigh
9,659 posts, read 7,234,624 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bridge781 View Post
Things like this scare me. I don’t want my kids to have to hide things from me. I can already see my 5 yr old son doing something like this.
If you set boundaries that they don't like, it's almost an inevitability. My wife babysat a couple and the kid took his dad's old phone, hooked up a charger, and was using it in bed after bedtime. They figured it out when the wife checked her facebook and saw her husband posting when she knew he hadn't posted those things. My wife felt it was a result of their extremely restrictive screen time rules.
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Old 02-21-2020, 01:10 PM
 
1,368 posts, read 357,748 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by OutdoorsExplorer View Post
Daughter is 16, works at Burger King, and has a cell phone and laptop she uses that we bought and paid for.

Once in a while, maybe once a month, twice a month, or less... she will get really bad on her chores, so we take away her phone for a day or two until the chores are done.

Last week we took her phone away.

Then found a secret 2nd phone in her room.

Is any punishment needed ? Should I let it go ?


She got the 2nd phone out of the trash, it was her old phone, screen was cracked really bad, so we threw it in the garbage 6 months ago and bought her a new one ..


She has had this phone for 6 months, never told us it still worked, or that she has it...
Cancel her phone contract asap.She is not mature enough to have one.
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Old 02-21-2020, 01:12 PM
 
Location: planet earth
6,633 posts, read 2,756,508 times
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Who is paying for phone service for both phones?
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Old 02-21-2020, 01:33 PM
 
12 posts, read 4,285 times
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For the love of GOD! she just uses WiFi for both phones ... . there are apps that do everything ...

A phone service contract is no longer needed when kids have wifi at home, school, McDonalds, and Starbucks
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Old 02-21-2020, 02:08 PM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
48,515 posts, read 46,777,539 times
Reputation: 95010
Quote:
Originally Posted by OutdoorsExplorer View Post
For the love of GOD! she just uses WiFi for both phones ... . there are apps that do everything ...

A phone service contract is no longer needed when kids have wifi at home, school, McDonalds, and Starbucks
Lol at least we know where she gets her attitude
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Old 02-21-2020, 02:59 PM
 
Location: DFW
1,068 posts, read 357,932 times
Reputation: 1885
Quote:
Originally Posted by ClaraC View Post
So. OP. Your daughter is in school full time, and also is working.

But she fails apparently to do her "chores" at home.

What punishment do you experience, yourself, after working full time, if you don't get your own household "chores" done, after working basically full time, basically the same schedule your daughter has?

Once, or sometimes twice a month, as you describe this, you don't do your "chores", what punishment do you put yourself through? Do you put your cell phone in the garbage?
^^ This

I am another one who thinks kids have too much on their plates these days. That said, it also takes the pressure off of ME- like I just worked both jobs yesterday, and then again today, and so if "dinner" is my
16 yo grabbing a fist full of cheese and 3 bites of leftovers, then that's what it is. Or she can use her money to buy herself some dinner. When there are no clean spoons because mom and dad work so much, she can wash one herself. We ask her to do one thing which is keep the main bathroom clean. She usually doesn't even do that, but the important thing is, we have set the example. Hubby and I are both fairly neat, and really do a deep cleaning if we are having company. I have seen her scramble to make sure things are ok if one of her friends says they are stopping by.

No worries OP- parents are really only here to set the example, and keep a person safe until which time they are on their own. These mini-humans come into the world with their very own karma
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