U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Covid-19 Information Page
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Parenting
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 02-27-2020, 10:06 AM
 
Location: Denver 'burbs
22,603 posts, read 24,279,340 times
Reputation: 39036

Advertisements

Quote:
Originally Posted by Indygrl84 View Post
Right, but why just assume that if given free time that won't use it wisely? What if they don't want to be busy or being sports? Force them anyway? I saw this happen to a high school friend of mine, good grade and my little friend group was not at all interested in trouble. She was always saying how exhausted she was and how she wished she could have more free time to actually see her friends. I always felt really bad for her, but at 16 she felt like she had not choice, she said her parents wouldn't allow her to drop the things she wasn't interested in.
No one here has mentioned forcing anyone to do anything. Some kids need to be busy constantly. I have one of those. We limited him to one sport per season- he would have chosen to do more. By the way, as an adult he is still that way. He runs, snowboards, snowshoes, cycles, golfs etc..so some people are wired that way. Best to corral that and provide positive outlets.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 02-27-2020, 10:21 AM
 
5,188 posts, read 4,477,557 times
Reputation: 14974
Quote:
Originally Posted by CGab View Post
We have 2 girls in competitive cheerleading which costs us thousands of dollars a year for each of them. We travel to other states, pay for hotels, food, entrance fees as a spectator, gas, etc. Not to mention the cost to actually participate monthly, the uniform, separate required tumbling class, etc. To top it off, both teams won a bid to The Summit national competition in May at Disney which will be a few thousand more. Both girls also do school cheerleading which is obviously much cheaper] however, school cheerleading and competitive cheer are completely different in nature! Next year, my oldest is going into H.S. and she will not be able to do both as it will be too much. She has to pick which one to do. She has decided to stay on the competitive team; however, my husband and I not sure we want to keep putting out the money for it. I'd honestly rather put it towards her college.

My dilemma is that both my girls truly love it. It's the only thing my younger daughter has stuck to. My oldest said that if she can't do the competitive team then she won't cheer anymore because she is not interested in cheering in high school. We can afford it, but as I said above, it's thousands of dollars and very time consuming for us. They have practice all day every Sunday, another day during the week and competitions almost every other week for 7 months. My husband wants them both to tryout for school cheer and if they don't make it then he will continue to allow them to do the competitive cheer.

My question is this...…...what do you consider too much to pay for a childs sport? If you can afford it, do you continue allowing them to do it because they love it or do you put a cap on what you will pay regardless? Also, would you allow your child to do a sport that would be very time consuming on you as well? What is your perspective on this?
I'd go with try out for school cheer, because we're DONE with paying for competitive cheer.

Two things. First, I have seen a LOT of serious, life-altering injuries in cheerleading, especially in the flyers. It's a high risk sport.

Second, is this something that is of great benefit to your girls? Is it worth the money invested? I would say, NO. It's not going to make them a living. If they're not in high school cheer, it's not gonna help them get into college. If they are not of the level to make the high school cheerleading team, then it's most definitely not worth all the money you are pouring into it.

Sit them down. Explain to them both the full cost of them continuing in competitive cheer - don't forget to include all the travel expenses. Then show them what they could earn, say, babysitting at ten bucks an hour, and how many hours a week, every week, all year long, they'd have to work to pay for it. If you're paying thousands of dollars a year for each of them, that's hundreds of hours of babysitting for each of them.
And that's not even taking into consideration that it has taken over YOUR lives, driving them to practices and competitions.

Tell them that it's over - they should try out for school cheer, or find another school sport or club to participate in - maybe color guard?
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 02-27-2020, 11:04 AM
 
Location: Howard County, Maryland
6,905 posts, read 4,313,149 times
Reputation: 19168
Quote:
Originally Posted by CGab View Post
My question is this...…...what do you consider too much to pay for a childs sport? If you can afford it, do you continue allowing them to do it because they love it or do you put a cap on what you will pay regardless? Also, would you allow your child to do a sport that would be very time consuming on you as well? What is your perspective on this?
1. "Too much to pay for a child's sport" is when you aren't putting enough into their college fund, or are shortchanging your own retirement funds, or are carrying credit-card balances, or are unable to afford that new appliance you need, or are past-due on the mortgage, or are still carrying your own student-loan debts. A gray area would be if you don't have enough money to take that vacation that you wanted, or attend the opera performance that you wanted to attend, or indulge in your own hobbies.

2. No, I would not allow my child to participate in a sport that demands too much of my time. Both of my kids enjoy basketball and soccer, and I have them on rec teams that are limited to within my own county. My son has asked if he could do travel teams, and I have emphatically told him no. I will not sacrifice my own life just so I can cart my kids around the state (or even the nation) and sit there watching the same games that I could be watching in the fields near my home. If that makes me sound selfish, so be it. I've told my son that when he's an adult and is on his own, how he manages his time is up to him. But if I'm involved in it, then I get the final say.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 02-27-2020, 11:10 AM
 
Location: Knoxville, TN
1,948 posts, read 946,860 times
Reputation: 5071
Quote:
Originally Posted by LilLisa83 View Post
There is such a thing as a professional cheerleader you know.... Maybe these girls could end up cheering for a professional football team?! You never know...

Op- if you can afford it, let them continue!
Have you watched the Netflix series Cheer about college cheerleading? One of the points they make very clearly is that after college, for almost all of them, cheerleading is OVER.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 02-27-2020, 11:12 AM
 
Location: Denver 'burbs
22,603 posts, read 24,279,340 times
Reputation: 39036
Quote:
Originally Posted by bus man View Post
1. "Too much to pay for a child's sport" is when you aren't putting enough into their college fund, or are shortchanging your own retirement funds, or are carrying credit-card balances, or are unable to afford that new appliance you need, or are past-due on the mortgage, or are still carrying your own student-loan debts. A gray area would be if you don't have enough money to take that vacation that you wanted, or attend the opera performance that you wanted to attend, or indulge in your own hobbies.

2. No, I would not allow my child to participate in a sport that demands too much of my time. Both of my kids enjoy basketball and soccer, and I have them on rec teams that are limited to within my own county. My son has asked if he could do travel teams, and I have emphatically told him no. I will not sacrifice my own life just so I can cart my kids around the state (or even the nation) and sit there watching the same games that I could be watching in the fields near my home. If that makes me sound selfish, so be it. I've told my son that when he's an adult and is on his own, how he manages his time is up to him. But if I'm involved in it, then I get the final say.
Yes, we too said "no" to travel teams. My son (the one who was involved ) was not an only child, and my daughter had other interests. We were not putting our family finances at risk, or focus all of our time over one childs activities. He did locally competitive leagues and occasionally went to nearby cities for tournaments. It was fine and worked for our family.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 02-27-2020, 12:35 PM
 
2,029 posts, read 2,072,603 times
Reputation: 2084
Quote:
Originally Posted by CGab View Post
We have 2 girls in competitive cheerleading which costs us thousands of dollars a year for each of them. We travel to other states, pay for hotels, food, entrance fees as a spectator, gas, etc. Not to mention the cost to actually participate monthly, the uniform, separate required tumbling class, etc. To top it off, both teams won a bid to The Summit national competition in May at Disney which will be a few thousand more. Both girls also do school cheerleading which is obviously much cheaper] however, school cheerleading and competitive cheer are completely different in nature! Next year, my oldest is going into H.S. and she will not be able to do both as it will be too much. She has to pick which one to do. She has decided to stay on the competitive team; however, my husband and I not sure we want to keep putting out the money for it. I'd honestly rather put it towards her college.

My dilemma is that both my girls truly love it. It's the only thing my younger daughter has stuck to. My oldest said that if she can't do the competitive team then she won't cheer anymore because she is not interested in cheering in high school. We can afford it, but as I said above, it's thousands of dollars and very time consuming for us. They have practice all day every Sunday, another day during the week and competitions almost every other week for 7 months. My husband wants them both to tryout for school cheer and if they don't make it then he will continue to allow them to do the competitive cheer.

My question is this...…...what do you consider too much to pay for a childs sport? If you can afford it, do you continue allowing them to do it because they love it or do you put a cap on what you will pay regardless? Also, would you allow your child to do a sport that would be very time consuming on you as well? What is your perspective on this?
Competitive cheerleading is a uniquely expensive sport. Google the ownership of varsity.com. They are a for-profit company and have a stranglehold on the cheerleading industry, controlling every aspect of it for their own financial benefit. Other sports have a non-profit governing body. It is a huge deal and actually impacts the safety of the kids. Varsity.com doesn't want cheer recognized as a sport because that would impact how they govern about safety etc. RUN, RUN, RUN from competitive cheer.

Your girls can use their skills in other sports such as competitive diving. Look into your state/city's youth diving team, outside of her school team. The lessons and travel will be much more reasonable and it is actually a recognized, sanctioned sport. Cheer athletes usually have an incredible fitness level and may find they can be competitive in cross country and track and field (think field events if your girls are bases). My middle schooler dropped cheer and has done cross country, diving and soccer. She is thriving and has not looked back.

My daughter was a flyer at a well-known gym. I spent $10,000 her last year on the activity. That did not include the medical costs for a broken foot and two concussions, not to mention the cost to her health. She is so much happier enjoying time with her friends and exploring new activities that she didn't have time for before. Her grades and health have improved and she no longer feels the need to spray tan. :-)
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 02-27-2020, 02:28 PM
 
Location: North Carolina
1,106 posts, read 1,689,878 times
Reputation: 1360
Its a tough call as a parent. My middle son played Pop Warner (very inexpensive) and did a couple of years of mostly local Basketball but was never consumed by it and dropped it all half way through high school. Now he did have a bunch of lucrative years working as a soccer referee so was able to stay active and make money at the same time.
My youngest son played club soccer for about 6 years. It was getting to the point of being expensive (IMO) with annual fees of $1600 and then travel and ref fees, uniforms etc. When he started pleading to skip practices we decided he was done.
My oldest daughter NEVER played a sport! She has always been quite into her studying and is at Duke University right now basically on a full ride. So honestly, your kids are better served in High School focusing on education and more likely to get a full ride accademically than athletically!
However, if you can afford it as a family and your kids are fully invested and love it - then who's to say how much is too much? (I miss the social scene of club soccer a little - bonding with the parents on the sidelines)
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 02-27-2020, 05:18 PM
 
554 posts, read 124,743 times
Reputation: 1497
Quote:
Originally Posted by saibot View Post
No doubt some of them are hoping for athletic scholarships. But there certainly aren't enough full scholarships for all the kids who are heavily involved in sports.
Even worse, there are some financial advisers who tell parents not to save money for their kids college, that the kids can just get scholarships. But what happens if the scholarship isn't available? And how many scholarships cover the full cost of tuition for four years? We have a student loan debt crisis in our country now. A lot of parents can well afford to save for college, but don't, too busy spending money on other stuff.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 02-27-2020, 06:47 PM
 
1,335 posts, read 2,005,983 times
Reputation: 6415
I would run away from a financial advisor who said that.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 02-28-2020, 06:34 AM
 
Location: Brew City
4,867 posts, read 3,013,827 times
Reputation: 6702
Quote:
Originally Posted by bondaroo View Post

Hello to a fellow hockey player! I also play in a couple of women's leagues, with the same variety of skill levels. Some pickup with men, too. I'm a goalie, so that keeps it interesting.
One of my leagues was invited to the Milwaukee Admirals game on Wednesday. We got to have a pre-game game, meet and greet, tickets to the game. It was part of their Hockey is Her campaign. I'm so happy for my girls that Women's Hockey is having a moment. Brianna Decker is is from the Milwaukee area and is always involved in promoting girls hockey. The girls love it when she brings her medals out.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Parenting
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or

All times are GMT -6. The time now is 09:58 PM.

© 2005-2020, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Contact Us - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37 - Top