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Old 03-03-2020, 03:15 PM
 
9,470 posts, read 3,553,795 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bondaroo View Post
About the bolded - taking a 10 year old boy into the women's bathroom is certainly an attempt to humiliate. He's way too old to be in there.


And the second bit - teaching a kid to avoid punishment is the weakest and laziest of parenting methods. People (and animals for that matter) learn best when they are taught what they should do, not how to avoid punishment.

Small point...it might've been a family style restroom. No proof...just a speculation.
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Old 03-03-2020, 03:18 PM
 
9,470 posts, read 3,553,795 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TXNGL View Post
Which might be a good reason to not act like a jerk in public if you don't want to be called out on it. It's gross! The push ups on a bathroom floor. And it's not discipline. That child will only learn fear from this, not how to behave properly. Ask any therapist or a pediatrician.

Fear of what? Germs? Being punished? Good. He should have a healthy fear of punishment. She's not hitting him. She's not doing anything abusive.


And when he's done, he can wash his hands.
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Old 03-03-2020, 03:45 PM
 
Location: Denver 'burbs
22,597 posts, read 24,262,813 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ocnjgirl View Post
I know, I don't like it either, but when you look at things like that poor little girl Faye Swetlick, snatched or lured from her own front yard, I can understand why a mom would be fearful to leave a child by himself somewhere while she took little sister to the bathroom. If you remember the kidnapping and murder of Adam Walsh, whose dad ended up creating the center for missing children, he was snatched from a department store with both parents in the store with him, it happened in a split second that they weren't looking.



This is why they need to have those "Family" bathrooms everywhere. I think men are in an even worse position, when they are out with their little daughters. They really can't take the child into the men's or ladies room.
Sorry- a 10 year old boy is capable of going to the restroom in a Hobby Lobby - if mom is nervous she can stand outside the door. In this case mom was using the ladies room to mete out punishment. Clearly there was at least one other woman in there. There was not a "need" to use the ladies room for that purpose.
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Old 03-03-2020, 04:05 PM
 
27,728 posts, read 19,588,217 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by maciesmom View Post
Sorry- a 10 year old boy is capable of going to the restroom in a Hobby Lobby - if mom is nervous she can stand outside the door. In this case mom was using the ladies room to mete out punishment. Clearly there was at least one other woman in there. There was not a "need" to use the ladies room for that purpose.

I really don't think that was the case, but I won't argue with you.
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Old 03-03-2020, 05:56 PM
 
31,874 posts, read 49,650,938 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hedgehog_Mom View Post
I think it's gross to do in the bathroom.

I'm old school, though. If you're going to discipline your child, wait until you get home. They'll have the waiting and anticipation on top of the punishment itself.

Most of the time when I see a parent yelling at their kid in public, it's the parent's fault, not the kid's fault. Don't take your kid shopping when they're hungry, tired, etc. Don't let them run wild and only intervene when an employee says something. Don't be so busy with your phone that you're ignoring your child.
My kids growing up knew they had crossed the line when I said “DFWM”

That usually drew compliance that was not previously forthcoming...
Because if it didn’t then they would pay the price when we got home—and we were going home asap
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Old 03-03-2020, 08:31 PM
 
Location: Arlington, VA —> North Carolina in October
24,649 posts, read 35,056,134 times
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I don’t have any issue with this. The mom took the boy to the bathroom so he would not be humiliated in public, she was swift in giving a punishment, she was not abusive and did not cause this kid harm. Other than maybe the bathroom not being clean don’t get what to see here,
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Old 03-04-2020, 01:13 AM
 
9,430 posts, read 11,498,412 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ocnjgirl View Post
I really don't think it is. I see many moms do this, but no one is fighting or angry. It's that parents are scared to leave a child alone while they take another child into the restroom, and scared to let them go alone into a men's room. With my bff, I could see her fight panic when her son was alone in a men's room and seemed to be taking a long time. I think it's weird too, but in today's times I understand it too. I honestly don't see it at all as an attempt to humiliate.
'
A 10 year old? I see moms with toddlers, preschoolers, perhaps a very young elementary kid (K?) in the ladies room. 10 years old is ridiculous. Having said that, I can't believe the people saying she took her kid to a private place to do the push ups. There is nothing really private about a public restroom that has stalls. People are in and out all the time. And once again I'll say it's gross, it's mean (kid has issues mentioned in the OP), meant to humiliate and *knock some sense* into the kid but in the end it won't work. Will only make a child with ODD more angry and defiant.
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Old 03-04-2020, 01:18 AM
 
9,430 posts, read 11,498,412 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sassybluesy View Post
Small point...it might've been a family style restroom. No proof...just a speculation.
Wasn't. Otherwise there wouldn't be someone there to video it. Which, BTW, I don't agree with either. It was a public restroom.
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Old 03-04-2020, 03:43 AM
 
27,728 posts, read 19,588,217 times
Reputation: 48894
Quote:
Originally Posted by TXNGL View Post
'
A 10 year old? I see moms with toddlers, preschoolers, perhaps a very young elementary kid (K?) in the ladies room. 10 years old is ridiculous. Having said that, I can't believe the people saying she took her kid to a private place to do the push ups. There is nothing really private about a public restroom that has stalls. People are in and out all the time. And once again I'll say it's gross, it's mean (kid has issues mentioned in the OP), meant to humiliate and *knock some sense* into the kid but in the end it won't work. Will only make a child with ODD more angry and defiant.
I really don’t think she took him in there to humiliate him. Yes, I have seen boys that age there. Usually when there’s multiple kids. Again, they normally do so most likely because they don’t want to leave a 10-year-old alone when they’re taking siblings to the bathroom. I don’t know this family’s story or why they were in that bathroom. But I really just don’t think it was to humiliate him.
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Old 03-04-2020, 04:21 AM
Status: "The ministers cat is an exhausted cat" (set 17 days ago)
 
Location: NJ
1,051 posts, read 359,711 times
Reputation: 3598
I dont know what people want. Children are under-disciplined in society. I am not suggesting the beatings of old, they didnt work. But for most people something was working. Children behaved better in stores and in public, they didnt talk back as much. This isnt a matter of "kids these days are terrible" because every generation says that. But somewhere we turned a corner and accepted that being talked down to by our children and yelled at by our children and not listened to by our children became acceptable. It isnt. If youve reasoned with them (seems to be the advice du jour), bargained with them, time out'd them and nothing is working, sorry not sorry you have to punish them.
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