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My parents didn't permit their kids to use any "four letter" words. I suspect it was my mother's influence because my dad cussed like a sailor (he WAS a sailor). He never swore at people, never in conversation, just the same few choice words when angry about something. All of us certainly ended up with a fine vocabulary because of him but I doubt any of us use it that often. I remember a rather funny dinner table discussion about one particular word. I'd overheard it at school, didn't know what it meant, and used it at dinner. Jaws dropped, eyes popped, forks and knives hit plates, you could have heard a pin drop. Luckily it was obvious I didn't understand the meaning...no one ran for the soap.
Last edited by Parnassia; 04-03-2020 at 04:34 PM..
I live in Ireland and here it's quite common for parents to be okay with kids cursing (well not kids but teens/young adults). It seems though to be a strong taboo in America in general. Many young adults won't even curse in front of their parents cause they see it as disrespectful.
Do you think it is?
Nope, mine are grown now, but when they were younger I would never have put up with it.
I can't control the language of others but I can control my language. And, unlike many of you, it would seem, I CAN typically string a sentence together pretty much ALL OF THE TIME without the need to spice it up with ugly language. But then, I've always avoided the 'monkey see-monkey do' tactics of 'the tribe' in order to fit in with society. Am I special?
I think it's interesting that in Ireland the C-word is very mild, meaning something like "jerk", whereas in the U.S. it's far worse than the F-word and will get you drawn and quartered. I remember Sinead O'Connor calling herself that on Facebook a few years ago, and Americans were absolutely getting the vapors over it.
Just an observation.
In the US, that word carries a ton of weight and simply is so disruptive when used that it completely takes focus off whatever point trying to be made. That is our culture, generally, at least at this time.
Culture, context, intent and audience matter. Part of a higher EQ is being able to understand that.
But I have little patience for scolds, faux outrage and pearl-clutching. I am far more offended by actions than words.
I live in Ireland and here it's quite common for parents to be okay with kids cursing (well not kids but teens/young adults). It seems though to be a strong taboo in America in general. Many young adults won't even curse in front of their parents cause they see it as disrespectful.
Do you think it is?
When my kids were younger - they got their mouth washed out for 'naughty' words. They each tried it ONCE.
I never swore back then... the occasional "ohhhh FISH feathers!' would come out or "Im soooo angry I could spit NAILS!' but nothing truly naughty.
As my kids got older (late teens) they would use the "S" word.. and I would tell them that they need to gauge their audience - at work? Never. At home with me, or with their friends... ok. In front of other adults in public? Nope.
Once they turned 18 - they could do whatever they wanted. My eldest rarely swears. My daughter will use an occasional "S' word.. my youngest can swear with the best of the best LOL BUT he knows when NOT to swear too.
I think it doesnt really matter as long as you explain to your kids the impact and repercussions naughty words can have in any given instance, so they arent taken aback when they are fired for profanity or ostracized.
I think it's interesting that in Ireland the C-word is very mild, meaning something like "jerk", whereas in the U.S. it's far worse than the F-word and will get you drawn and quartered. I remember Sinead O'Connor calling herself that on Facebook a few years ago, and Americans were absolutely getting the vapors over it.
Just an observation.
It seems in the UK swear words (all of them) are a part of everyday life... but the view on those, as well as sex in general is pretty open minded, over there. My other half is from Scotland, and its always 'Fn this' and "bloody' that and when I had found out my best friends daughter had been sleeping around, and he was all about 'Oh FFS, shes a sexual being, leave her be'. LOL But of course, as he keeps reminding me, WE are just babies over here... only 200 some odd years old.. compared to Europe who is... hundreds of thousands years old.. we cant be expected to be as open minded as they are over there
"Profanity is no substitute for Wit" - Violet from Downton Abbey.
I don't mind if someone uses the f word occasionally, however if they feel the need to use it constantly it changes my opinion of them. In my mind, they have something lacking as far as education or respect toward other people.
When my kids were little we were out having some ice cream at the beach and this guy at the next table kept cursing and using the f word constantly. I finally walked over to his table and politely asked him to refrain from the cursing as I didn't want my boys to hear it and think it was normal to speak like that. He complied. Now this was almost 30 years ago, doubt people these days would have been so amenable.
It seems in the UK swear words (all of them) are a part of everyday life... but the view on those, as well as sex in general is pretty open minded, over there. My other half is from Scotland, and its always 'Fn this' and "bloody' that and when I had found out my best friends daughter had been sleeping around, and he was all about 'Oh FFS, shes a sexual being, leave her be'. LOL But of course, as he keeps reminding me, WE are just babies over here... only 200 some odd years old.. compared to Europe who is... hundreds of thousands years old.. we cant be expected to be as open minded as they are over there
WHAT!! LOL
And where does he think most of us came from?!! Countries all over the world, old cultures that were brought to America.
And it's not 200 years, Europeans began arriving over 400 years ago, bringing their "old as dirt" culture with them.
None of us as citizens are babies but many of us have standards of conduct and self-respect that encourage us to be dignified and honorable.
F this and F that as much as anyone wants, go for it, believe me it doesn't make them look open minded.
I've known people who use the most dignified and honourable language and would never think of cursing such gutter trash rude disrespectful words (to use some descriptors used by posters in this thread), but they were racist, classist, rude and mean people. You can cloak disgusting attitudes in pretty words.
So, to me, an occasional interjection of a word that would have some pearl-clutching is not an issue. Calling people names is always rude and mean, no matter the words used.
Dropping f-bombs every second word I find boring to listen to, as the word is meaningless in that context. It's just a tic, such as those who use "like" constantly. But it doesn't curl my nose hairs.
My daughter is grown now, and we'll all occasionally interject some swear words. Not a big deal. We're all intelligent people with decent sized vocabularies, and we know where and when it's acceptable.
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