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Old 04-26-2020, 11:31 AM
 
Location: planet earth
6,626 posts, read 2,751,410 times
Reputation: 14903

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Three Wolves In Snow View Post
I'll tell you what worked with me when I was a kid. It was a movie. They showed it in school. We saw it twice, once was when I was pretty young, and once was when I was in high school. I may have forgotten the title of the movie, but I have never, ever forgotten the scene of the guy in his bathroom, on the floor, with blood and crap and white stuff coming out of his mouth after he ODed on drugs - I think it was heroin. It wasn't acting. It was real footage.

I won't forget the guy spitting up blood after taking acid.

Yeah, it was "in your face" and very real - and that's all it took. I never, EVER even had the desire to try out heroin, meth, cocaine, or whatever the hell else is out there that people do.

I didn't need "DARE" and "say 'no' to drugs" and speeches on campus or in the auditorium and pamphlets and stories of being homeless or jobless or losing everything - that movie was all that was needed to keep me far, far away from drugs.
Why would anyone spit up blood after taking acid? Makes absolutely no sense.

Otherwise, congrats on your "scared straight" method for not taking drugs.
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Old 04-26-2020, 12:04 PM
 
22 posts, read 7,477 times
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I don't know, but if my parents had forced me to be bust I would have been pissed and kind of hurt. It was just prove thay they didn't trust me or have any faith that I wouldn't do anything stupid.
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Old 04-26-2020, 12:06 PM
 
2,784 posts, read 2,153,839 times
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So-called "addictive" personalities (actually people who inherently just like getting high) is genetic. Most of us can trace alcoholism and/or drug addiction somewhere in our family tree and connect some dots. Just like the "born horny" gene it is Mendelian.

Strict upbringing in the formative years offers some hope that the individual won't so easily center their life around dope (or alcohol), but from what I've seen, it's nowhere near 100%. I've seen people I know were raised in a tightly wound household, but sometime later, soon as they got freed up, they went off the tracks anyways.

It usually shows up first in teenagers. They're not always so rebellious either. Usually just sneaky. And there really is little you can do about it if it's going to happen. Just don't blame yourself.
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Old 04-26-2020, 12:54 PM
 
Location: Southern MN
7,436 posts, read 4,221,209 times
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If they're curious and genetically prone they are at risk. I believe that at some age they should be told if addiction runs in the family tree. Also take opportunity now and then to inform them of symptoms of early addiction. Learn them yourself and where to get early help.

I guess I'd say to try to do this matter-of-factly and casually and a little at a time when the occasion presents or you're going to look like you're harping.

Relatives generally are helpless in the face of addiction in a family member, unfortunately.

I think the best bet is to start instilling in your child early how to deal with uncomfortable feelings and that those feelings aren't "bad" but rather are messages that he is either thinking or behaving in a way that needs to be changed. Help him build his self-esteem (and not with false praise. ) And gradually teach him how to raise his own self-esteem with accomplishments he can be proud of. He needs to know how he feels about himself is not dependent on others but that he has the power to feel good about himself when he does the right thing.

This means at least two things that are difficult for loving parents to do.

1. Teaching him to accept consequences for his negative actions.

2. Teaching him to follow through on his plans even when the going gets tough.

Those are two things I've never met an addict who was able to do.
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Old 04-26-2020, 01:07 PM
 
Location: planet earth
6,626 posts, read 2,751,410 times
Reputation: 14903
Quote:
Originally Posted by TwinbrookNine View Post
So-called "addictive" personalities (actually people who inherently just like getting high) is genetic. Most of us can trace alcoholism and/or drug addiction somewhere in our family tree and connect some dots. Just like the "born horny" gene it is Mendelian.

Strict upbringing in the formative years offers some hope that the individual won't so easily center their life around dope (or alcohol), but from what I've seen, it's nowhere near 100%. I've seen people I know were raised in a tightly wound household, but sometime later, soon as they got freed up, they went off the tracks anyways.

It usually shows up first in teenagers. They're not always so rebellious either. Usually just sneaky. And there really is little you can do about it if it's going to happen. Just don't blame yourself.
100% agree. I know alcoholics who were raised in good, Catholic homes. Parents were VERY involved.

I also know parents who told their kids they are at risk due to genetics and even took them to Alateen as teens so they could get educated, and it had zero effect on their decisions regarding drugs/alcohol.

It's a crap shoot.

I wouldn't have kids again, just based on the fact that you can be the most nurturing parent, and still, you have no control over how your kids are going to turn out. It, evidently, has very little to do with "nurture," and everything to do with "nature."
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Old 04-26-2020, 01:09 PM
 
3,253 posts, read 1,336,181 times
Reputation: 7785
In 2015 45% of Americans over 12 (115 million people) used prescription pain killers, tranquilizers, stimulants or sedatives.

https://www.samhsa.gov/data/sites/de...-FFR2-2015.htm

12% of the adult population smokes marijuana. And 86 percent of people over 18 drank alcohol. So almost everyone has come into contact with drugs and alcohol or someone who does drugs and drinks alcohol. Except for the potential legal consequences and lack of insurance coverage for non-prescription drugs, it makes no difference whether drugs are prescription or illegal. They are the same drugs. Just like it made no difference in prohibition that alcohol was illegal. It was still alcohol.

Having used drugs (prescription and non-prescription) and alcohol myself, and having kids who have done the same, I can say that young teenagers aren't going to let their parents know what they are doing until after they have been doing it for a while. So I see no way to prevent your kids from trying drugs and/or alcohol.
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Old 04-26-2020, 01:11 PM
 
Location: southern california
58,522 posts, read 77,457,678 times
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Glad you asked stop giving them money if they have to work for it they won’t spend it on drugs
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Old 04-26-2020, 01:44 PM
 
13,467 posts, read 21,845,418 times
Reputation: 36969
Drug users lie, and too often their parents accept their denial. A good friend buried her only child this year after he od'd on heroin. For months her siblings had begged her to get him into residential treatment, but she chose to believe her son. If people claim your child is on drugs, take them seriously.
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Old 04-26-2020, 07:48 PM
 
598 posts, read 451,944 times
Reputation: 438
What's the best strategy to avoid teens doing drugs?

My father and mother did not use drugs, not even booze.
I do not use drugs nor use booze not POT
My now adult kids do not use drugs nor booze nor POT. They did not ever see a single can of booze in the house growing up
Their kids will not use drugs nor use booze nor use pot.

My parents were successful in life
I am successful in life
My now adult kids are successful. One received a letter from the State Senate for the highest scores in the State University system.

Incidentally, i do not have tattoos or go around saying 'bro'. My now adult kids do not.


If a parent-s is using booze or drugs or POT, think it's obvious where their teens were initially proselytize to drug use.
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Old 04-26-2020, 07:56 PM
 
Location: Tyler, TX, born + raised SF Bay
2,840 posts, read 1,226,910 times
Reputation: 2612
I’d say just be open an honest. My oldest is about to be 10, and she’s getting the birds and bees thing. I hate it, but she’s going to do things I wouldn’t want my parents knowing about. That’s more top-of-mind now than drugs.

Drugswise, we are okay with some drinking and pot in the house. But she will know there’s hellfire and brimstone of she does more. We’re more ok with pot than drinking, but stuff like meth or coke...you’re kinda done when you’re on that. My wife was a meth addict. I’m pretty sure she can make it clear. Movies like Requiem for a Dream would, I hope, put a nail in the coffin for amphetamines as hard as it did for me.
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