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Old 06-13-2020, 01:10 AM
 
Location: North Dakota
8,186 posts, read 9,886,020 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RobertFisher View Post
The alternative is a CA public high school that ranks in the 90 percentile.

No doubt, private high school will deliver a more rigorous curriculum. I am wondering if the difference justifies the spending.
Holy **** that's a lot of money. Private school doesn't always mean it's good and lots are religious which means indoctrination. Those that aren't are full of rich *******s. Someday the kid will be an adult and will need to learn to deal with different people.
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Old 06-13-2020, 02:20 AM
 
Location: Redwood Shores, CA
658 posts, read 245,111 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BirdieBelle View Post
Is it YOUR desire or your son's desire?
I can share what every stakeholder's inclination is, but will that affect your opinion?
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Old 06-13-2020, 06:06 AM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
48,761 posts, read 47,054,962 times
Reputation: 95498
Quote:
Originally Posted by RobertFisher View Post
I can share what every stakeholder's inclination is, but will that affect your opinion?


No. I don’t like games.

In my area, the public school is as desirable as any of the private schools, and even a but more so because it’s already paid for.
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Old 06-13-2020, 07:04 AM
 
955 posts, read 247,880 times
Reputation: 2825
Quote:
Originally Posted by RobertFisher View Post
I can share what every stakeholder's inclination is, but will that affect your opinion?
Yes, because in posts like these I wish the OP would lay out all the cards at once and not trickle out new information bit by bit. IMHO that's unproductive and somewhat rude.
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Old 06-13-2020, 07:45 AM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
48,761 posts, read 47,054,962 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by KemBro71 View Post
Yes, because in posts like these I wish the OP would lay out all the cards at once and not trickle out new information bit by bit. IMHO that's unproductive and somewhat rude.
I agree.

Ask what you want to know so we all don't waste time.
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Old 06-13-2020, 09:41 AM
 
Location: Redwood Shores, CA
658 posts, read 245,111 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BirdieBelle View Post
I agree.

Ask what you want to know so we all don't waste time.
Sometimes fellow wives can be defensive of wives' views, and same for husbands.... I actually want people's opinions without those potential subconscious influences.

Anyway my wife is for going to private school. She occupies the moral high ground "don't be cheap with kids's education" but does have her reasoning:

1. Wife believes private school provides a more rigorous curriculum. I know this is a debatable and subjective topic; I will just say I agree at least in the sense that my kid's current private school gives a lot of homework, and constantly has activities even during this Covid period, doing Zoom classes everyday.

2. Private schools filter in kids that are focused on learning, either willingly or are forced by their parents. I am wording this as delicately as I can, since this is an even more politically sensitive topic. By contrast, our local public schools seem to be pre-occupied with a lot of other stuff. For example, our nearest public elementary school has a busing program busing in poorer neighborhood kids to achieve a certain mix in the class. I don't know if this occurs at high school level, but either way public high schools are bound to have a lot of kids who have no intention of further studying and are there just because that's required by the law.

3. Our kid is not self-motivating; he needs that extra attention and push.

4. She feel we can sell a property to fund this.

I incline toward public school because:

1. Private school is very expensive. We have another son who will be going to private middle school too; tuition adds up quickly. Our money is all invested; if we are to do this, some changes needs to be made. I have heard of selling a house to fund college; but high school?!

2. This one happens to be a Catholic school. I am not religious, my wife is a casual Christian, are we even in the right religion? My kid already went to Catholic middle school; he had to devote time to studying religious theories; a lot of paper have to reference the bible. I think those are times that can be devote to something more useful for college prep.

3. The public school being ranked in the 90 percentile, I wonder how big the incremental benefit there is.

4. Being mediocre in a rigorous program may not be as attractive to college admission people as being the top 5% of a decent public school. This I have firsthand experience - I went to one of the worst high schools in town, was in many advance classes, and made it to Berkeley. Getting into the best colleges these days requires a very good strategy rather than just blindly getting into the most rigorous program.

Our kid has pros and cons for each school:

1. Public school has a stronger tennis program, which is his sport of choice. He is good enough to play in tournaments and want to continue to play.

2. Private school has a very nice 68 acre campus.

3. His best friend from elementary school will be going to the same public high school, and his best friend from middle school will be going to the same private school.

4. He has stated he doesn't want parents to spend so much money (maybe because my wife keep reminding him "we're spending so much money so you better study hard...")

Everyone has a position on this, but are open. No one wants to be the one twisting arms. So, a bit hard to weigh these all out and make a logical, final decision.
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Old 06-13-2020, 09:59 AM
 
955 posts, read 247,880 times
Reputation: 2825
It would mean you'd have less $ to purchase the aircraft you want for yourself.
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Old 06-13-2020, 10:35 AM
 
Location: Redwood Shores, CA
658 posts, read 245,111 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by KemBro71 View Post
It would mean you'd have less $ to purchase the aircraft you want for yourself.
4 years=168K, vs. 15K... will impact a host of other stuff...
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Old 06-13-2020, 10:56 AM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
48,761 posts, read 47,054,962 times
Reputation: 95498
Quote:
Originally Posted by RobertFisher View Post

Sometimes fellow wives can be defensive of wives' views, and same for husbands.... I actually want people's opinions without those potential subconscious influences.
Well, I'm not a wife, so you can rest easy. Seriously, just trust people to give you steady advice.

Quote:
Originally Posted by RobertFisher View Post

Anyway my wife is for going to private school. She occupies the moral high ground "don't be cheap with kids's education" but does have her reasoning:
Living where you live, your property taxes aren't "being cheap" with the education, and if you don't already use a lot of government services, it will be one chance for you to take advantage of the tax dollars you're already paying in.

Quote:
Originally Posted by RobertFisher View Post

1. Wife believes private school provides a more rigorous curriculum. I know this is a debatable and subjective topic;
It's easily verifiable, and should be the first thing you look at.


Quote:
Originally Posted by RobertFisher View Post
2. Private schools filter in kids that are focused on learning, either willingly or are forced by their parents.
Public schools do that as well, but private schools also can be a last resort for problem kids, too.

Quote:
Originally Posted by RobertFisher View Post

I am wording this as delicately as I can, since this is an even more politically sensitive topic. By contrast, our local public schools seem to be pre-occupied with a lot of other stuff. For example, our nearest public elementary school has a busing program busing in poorer neighborhood kids to achieve a certain mix in the class. I don't know if this occurs at high school level, but either way public high schools are bound to have a lot of kids who have no intention of further studying and are there just because that's required by the law.
So you're saying you consider his being in class with the "less fortunate" a negative.

Quote:
Originally Posted by RobertFisher View Post

3. Our kid is not self-motivating; he needs that extra attention and push.
Help for this isn't limited to private school.

Quote:
Originally Posted by RobertFisher View Post

4. She feel we can sell a property to fund this.
You really need to think more about your retirement fund than paying this much for an education.

Quote:
Originally Posted by RobertFisher View Post

I incline toward public school because:

1. Private school is very expensive. We have another son who will be going to private middle school too; tuition adds up quickly. Our money is all invested; if we are to do this, some changes needs to be made. I have heard of selling a house to fund college; but high school?!
It's not only the tuition, but fees for activities, sports equipment, etc. can be higher at a private school.

Quote:
Originally Posted by RobertFisher View Post

2. This one happens to be a Catholic school. I am not religious, my wife is a casual Christian, are we even in the right religion? My kid already went to Catholic middle school; he had to devote time to studying religious theories; a lot of paper have to reference the bible. I think those are times that can be devote to something more useful for college prep.
I had a Catholic education, and I recognize now that what I learned was incredible, in terms of history, politics, art and literature. He would have to attend mass and probably say prayers before each class.

Quote:
Originally Posted by RobertFisher View Post
3. The public school being ranked in the 90 percentile, I wonder how big the incremental benefit there is.
The percentile isn't something to focus on in terms of numbers. It most likely means the school is fed by well-to-do neighborhoods with college-educated parents who have high expectations for their kids.

Quote:
Originally Posted by RobertFisher View Post

4. He has stated he doesn't want parents to spend so much money (maybe because my wife keep reminding him "we're spending so much money so you better study hard...")
This ^^ is really, really sad. Please get her to stop doing this, because that guilt will seriously mess him up and make all your worries about school choice moot.
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Old 06-13-2020, 11:48 AM
 
Location: State of Transition
84,417 posts, read 77,596,360 times
Reputation: 85560
Quote:
Originally Posted by RobertFisher View Post
The alternative is a CA public high school that ranks in the 90 percentile.

No doubt, private high school will deliver a more rigorous curriculum. I am wondering if the difference justifies the spending.
If your local public school ranks highly, it sounds like the curriculum is rigorous enough. The dirty little secret about private schools, is that they tend to be very limited in their course offerings, unless they're subsidized by a church, or are big enough, that they take in enough tuition money to offer electives and plenty of choice in the college-prep curriculum, i.e. science, history, politics, economics, global/international focus on those topics. etc. etc., that small private schools don't offer, or only in a very limited manner.

Public schools offer a more well-rounded experience in my observation. Some even offer entry-level career-track courses, like introduction law, and the like. They offer a wider choice of foreign languages, for students who are into that. Some private schools make up for the deficiency, by allowing their junior and senior-year students to take university courses, if there's a university or good CC nearby.

The one reason you might prefer a private school, in spite of the limited curriculum, is that your kids will be guaranteed to learn university-level advanced grammar and writing skills. They won't be among the students university faculty tear their hair out over, due to barely understandable term papers written in very clumsy, convoluted English.They won't have to take a remedial writing course, upon arriving at university.

That, for some parents, is worth the hefty tuition bill. Also, it's about class size; class sizes in private schools are smaller, so students get more individual attention.

Last edited by Ruth4Truth; 06-13-2020 at 12:04 PM..
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