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Old 09-10-2020, 01:12 AM
 
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When I say I was envisioning a two month span of not spending any real time with her, what I meant was I was envisioning that as a scenario to be avoided. There was a touch of hyperbole in there.

I'm grateful for the input from all. Respectfully, though, I can't just "risk it." For a few reasons, risking it is not an option for me and I'm not able to change that.

She's definitely welcome here and she knows that. But, like any adult living here, she still needs to abide by the rules of the house. I want to be safe, but I don't want to be too over the top restrictive with those rules, either. So I am seeking input from those who are more cautious, like me, as to what steps they take in this situation.

(But boy, a rapid COVID test, as Larry mentioned, would really solve this. Maybe they'll be more available by Thanksgiving?)

Last edited by IntoSomething; 09-10-2020 at 01:24 AM..
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Old 09-10-2020, 12:24 PM
 
Location: NJ
23,859 posts, read 33,518,785 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by IntoSomething View Post
In our household, we still don't go to stores or restaurants (we do curbside pickup and restaurant delivery), and we don't have visitors. My husband works at home. I work in a very small building, in my own enclosed office with a number of my own precautions in place there to manage the air I'm breathing. We keep our risk down very low.

If you are a more careful type, like we are, how do you handle your college student coming home for visits from living on campus? Do you require them to take any special precautions or steps? Do you take any special precautions or steps?
You're COVID cautious but you do not have underlying medical issues I assume?

When I go to the convenience store I use my left hand only to touch stuff, my right hand has my cane. When food shopping, I shop at Walmart who sanitizes the whole cart. I was at Shop Rite yesterday, they weren't even sanitizing carts because it was slightly raining. I dislike even having to go there. I'm always wiping my hands and cane down with a disinfecting towel once I get to my car. My immune system is seriously bad, I also have COPD and other health issues. I try not to go out if not absolutely necessary.

My son works for Comcast, my hub works 3-11pm at Sam's club, thankfully they haven't brought it home. My 3 year old granddaughter went to daycare for 6 weeks last month, she goes back on the 23rd. She comes here every day; we drop her off and pick her up until her father gets home from work. His girlfriend also works. My 7 year old grandson that lives with us is doing home learning, supposedly until November. I'm nervous someone will bring it home to myself or my daughter and grandson. His immune system sucks too.

Even though you're trying to stay safe while out at work, can you really say you are safe?

I wouldn't let COVID stop me from seeing my kids, my adult son lives with us, so does my adult daughter. My granddaughter lives with her father for now.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Bridge781 View Post
Are you in a high risk category or you’re just very afraid of getting coronavirus? If it’s simply fear then it sounds like you’ll be living the way you are for quite some time.

DH and I are both working from home because that’s what our employers decided for us. We have been going to grocery stores since all this happened. We didn’t have the patience for groceries delivered. We wear masks, hand sanitizer has become an accessory, we don’t have people over our house but we do go to my parents beach house every weekend to spend time with my parents. We go to the beach, my son plays hockey, both kids are going back to school with a hybrid model. Life has changed in that we see less people I suppose. There’s been no parties the way there once were and masks are worn regularly. We have gone out to eat, eaten inside and outside. We also had our 20 yr old babysitter come weekly to take kids to the beach.

The numbers are so low where I am that I guess I don’t feel the fear. Up until March I was commuting by a very crowded train into Boston everyday. I don’t see myself doing that for a very long time. That was the one thing I was nervous about.

If I had a college kid I’d want them home with me. If that didn’t happen I’d just hope that they followed the rules and didn’t attend parties. Unfortunately college kids will be kids and I’d maybe be nervous that they’d bring something home to us. Lord knows my kids brought home a stomach bug that had me in bed barely able to move for about 36 hours the past two years.
Sounds like she's just worried about getting it and is not in a high risk category because if she was, she would be working from home.


Quote:
Originally Posted by BirdieBelle View Post
My college students modified their personal hygiene and were good about staying in during the mandatory stay-home period, but once that was over they came and went almost as usual, but with masks and hand-washing, etc.

My high-schooler and his friend group were harder to convince about staying apart and hung out almost as normal once the lockdown ended. They were like their own little family group, though, and none have has been sick, thank God. My 16-year-old got a part-time retail job during the pandemic and has been working that ever since. The employees wear masks in the store.
We're having issues with kids in my development that haven't been social distancing, they're even riding their bike to WaWa (convenience store), my biggest gripe, they're not wearing the NJ mandated mask. They're pulling their shirt up over their mouth and nose in the store only, not in between the main doors outside and the 2nd set going into the store. I'd guess you'd call it a small lobby. I saw them going in for a cup of water the other day. They then have their hands all over the doors too. Next time I go there I'm going to speak to the manager and see if he will put his foot down about them pulling up their shirt. I don't think that would even qualify as a mandated face covering.


Quote:
Originally Posted by charolastra00 View Post
I work at a university and our students are expected not to visit home until Thanksgiving, in which case they are all home for the semester. The exception is only for students living at home due to the pandemic. It's a disciplinary offense that could result in privileges to campus being revoked. Many colleges have similar rules because the nature of residence hall living is that much more risky to the spread of covid. Make sure before your kids come home if they live in a dorm that they know what is expected of them regarding travel.
All colleges should be like this. Once on campus, they stay there until break
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Old 09-10-2020, 01:07 PM
 
Location: Raleigh
13,703 posts, read 12,410,701 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by IntoSomething View Post
We're fortunate (I guess, if you can call divorce "fortunate") that her father lives nearby and his rules are not as strict as mine are. We agreed that she would stay with him for the few months before she went to college and she will probably go there again for Thanksgiving break. She'll be nearby, with a parent, and she has less rules to follow, which I guess every teenager would prefer. So it's really not a bad situation.

But, let's face it, I'm her mother and I miss having her here. So I was curious to know what kind of precautions could maybe help ease my mind about it. Thank you to those who have responded so far.
Maybe just offer to pay for a test before she comes home? If negative have her over.
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Old 09-10-2020, 05:50 PM
 
Location: Myrtle Creek, Oregon
15,293 posts, read 17,669,308 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by IntoSomething View Post
(But boy, a rapid COVID test, as Larry mentioned, would really solve this. Maybe they'll be more available by Thanksgiving?)
It should be available right now. It's a simple test that any lab can perform. The urgent care clinic doesn't even send it out, they do it in the back room. The nurses call it a Fast Covid Test. There are some false negatives, but the CDC test isn't much better.
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Old 09-10-2020, 07:24 PM
 
1,154 posts, read 366,134 times
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It’s important that those taking a COVID test have isolated themselves for five-to-seven days before taking the test; otherwise, they can test negative after exposure but before the test can detect infection.
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Old 09-11-2020, 09:05 AM
 
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This thread is really sad and depressing. It's one thing for people to be paranoid and deluded enough and ruin their own lives. It's quite another to impose paranoia and delusion on one's children.
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Old 09-11-2020, 09:26 AM
 
1,154 posts, read 366,134 times
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Originally Posted by dysgenic View Post
This thread is really sad and depressing. It's one thing for people to be paranoid and deluded enough and ruin their own lives. It's quite another to impose paranoia and delusion on one's children.
I’m sorry you feel that way. Because I have a chronic health condition that makes me vulnerable to severe COVID, it is essential that we stay infection free if we want to see each other. My family adjusted fairly easily and were even able to make a trip to another part of the country this summer to visit a family member who was having surgery. It just took good planning and vigilance. These changes have certainly not ruined our lives, and we are comforted and reassured by our mutual concern for each other’s well-being.
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Old 09-11-2020, 11:33 AM
 
3,092 posts, read 1,945,151 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by abbottkd71 View Post
I’m sorry you feel that way. Because I have a chronic health condition that makes me vulnerable to severe COVID, it is essential that we stay infection free if we want to see each other. My family adjusted fairly easily and were even able to make a trip to another part of the country this summer to visit a family member who was having surgery. It just took good planning and vigilance. These changes have certainly not ruined our lives, and we are comforted and reassured by our mutual concern for each other’s well-being.
What you call mutual concern for well being I call paranoia and delusion.
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Old 09-11-2020, 11:53 AM
 
1,154 posts, read 366,134 times
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Originally Posted by dysgenic View Post
What you call mutual concern for well being I call paranoia and delusion.
It would not be paranoia and delusion if you’d been through what I’ve been through these last eight years. I have no intention of succumbing to this virus after fighting tooth and nail to overcome it all. I’m grateful to have a family that loves me and is willing to adjust to ensure that I stay healthy.
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Old 09-11-2020, 12:58 PM
bu2
 
24,070 posts, read 14,859,997 times
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Originally Posted by MarkManger765 View Post
There's a practical limit to everything.

I know a neighbor who hasn't left her house since March. She is super high risk. But even she is going stir crazy. I think she is getting to a point where she would rather risk death than be in a self imposed home prison.

We can only control what we can control...the illusion that we can control everything is just that, an illusion. You could do everything perfectly in your home, and catch some type of dreadful cancer that could be life threatening.

I try to practice common sense with my family, but at some point in time, people have to live.
And with college age kids, there's only so much you can control. Don't let them breathe on you until they have been home 14 days! And make sure everyone washes their hands regularly.

Unless you have underlying health conditions that make you high risk, as the above poster said, use common sense but realize having a college age kid increases your own risk. And realize they could be at home bringing it in every day!
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