U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Covid-19 Information Page
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Parenting
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 02-06-2021, 06:43 AM
 
19 posts, read 11,597 times
Reputation: 35

Advertisements

Riley

I was so young and dumb at the time. Manipulated by my Mom and my family in my ear making me feel I was obligated. Also, because this baby is family I couldn’t turn her over.

I was all in. I’m gave up a lot. Put myself last. What any other parent would do. More than anything I’m grieving now. I’m embarrassed. Almost 31 and feel my best years are gone. I’ve achieved a lot but she was my purpose and for her to just turn on me was like someone setting me on fire with gasoline.

But you are so correct I can’t and won’t give up my life for this child any longer. She’s with my mom. My mom calls all the time for money to go towards her. I redirected her to call my sister or my niece’s father. I’m done.
Rate this post positively Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 02-06-2021, 09:21 AM
 
Location: Northern California
71,009 posts, read 5,666,780 times
Reputation: 23522
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sosoblessed516 View Post
Riley

I was so young and dumb at the time. Manipulated by my Mom and my family in my ear making me feel I was obligated. Also, because this baby is family I couldn’t turn her over.

I was all in. I’m gave up a lot. Put myself last. What any other parent would do. More than anything I’m grieving now. I’m embarrassed. Almost 31 and feel my best years are gone. I’ve achieved a lot but she was my purpose and for her to just turn on me was like someone setting me on fire with gasoline.

But you are so correct I can’t and won’t give up my life for this child any longer. She’s with my mom. My mom calls all the time for money to go towards her. I redirected her to call my sister or my niece’s father. I’m done.

Good for you, who gets the welfare check for the child, and also the tax credits? If they are low income, they can get earned income credit, which can amount to thousands of dollars refunded. Do you have any contact with the child, like phone calls or email?
Rate this post positively Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 02-06-2021, 07:54 PM
 
Location: Vermont
3,292 posts, read 1,143,426 times
Reputation: 5013
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sosoblessed516 View Post
Riley

I was so young and dumb at the time. Manipulated by my Mom and my family in my ear making me feel I was obligated. Also, because this baby is family I couldn’t turn her over.

I was all in. I’m gave up a lot. Put myself last. What any other parent would do. More than anything I’m grieving now. I’m embarrassed. Almost 31 and feel my best years are gone. I’ve achieved a lot but she was my purpose and for her to just turn on me was like someone setting me on fire with gasoline.

But you are so correct I can’t and won’t give up my life for this child any longer. She’s with my mom. My mom calls all the time for money to go towards her. I redirected her to call my sister or my niece’s father. I’m done.
We were all young and dumb at one time, Soso....don't blame yourself and don't be embarrassed!! You did the right thing at the time and there is no shame in that. Whose heart would not go out to a little girl that no one seemed to 'want.'
At 31 you are reaching your peak, so you still have so much ahead of you. Sounds like the corner has turned with the situation and you can have some space and quiet (I wouldn't answer your Mom's call, but I get that, too) to plan your life going forward. Perhaps in the future, the circumstances will lend themselves to you reconnecting with her.
I really wish you the best of luck. Stay well.
Rate this post positively Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 02-06-2021, 09:10 PM
 
7,418 posts, read 3,539,244 times
Reputation: 20501
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sosoblessed516 View Post
Riley

I was so young and dumb at the time. Manipulated by my Mom and my family in my ear making me feel I was obligated. Also, because this baby is family I couldn’t turn her over.

I was all in. I’m gave up a lot. Put myself last. What any other parent would do. More than anything I’m grieving now. I’m embarrassed. Almost 31 and feel my best years are gone. I’ve achieved a lot but she was my purpose and for her to just turn on me was like someone setting me on fire with gasoline.

But you are so correct I can’t and won’t give up my life for this child any longer. She’s with my mom. My mom calls all the time for money to go towards her. I redirected her to call my sister or my niece’s father. I’m done.
Waittttttt just a minute now...


You helped/raised a child that had absolutely no one! Embarrassed? Love, you should be shouting from rooftops "I am awesome & I did my very best!" Thats an achievement & a sacrifice most wont do nor handle. WEAR THAT LIKE A BADGE GIRLFRIEND.

31? Life is just beginning for you. Its your time now. You EARNED it.

You sacrificed a lot but I believe the rewards for that will come back to you tenfold.

Thank you for contributing to the good in the world.
Rate this post positively Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 02-16-2021, 12:29 PM
 
19 posts, read 11,597 times
Reputation: 35
Quote:
Originally Posted by evening sun View Post
Good for you, who gets the welfare check for the child, and also the tax credits? If they are low income, they can get earned income credit, which can amount to thousands of dollars refunded. Do you have any contact with the child, like phone calls or email?
Her Mom and My mom has been claiming her subsequently.

I have no contact with the child as of now. Since she’s doing remote learning. My mom and I decided it was best for her to finish the school year out with her current school. However, the teachers call and text about her not going to class, submitting her work and when she’s online having a smart mouth. She told my other sister ( not her mom) that she didn’t feel bad and wasn’t going to apologize.
Rate this post positively Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 02-17-2021, 06:21 AM
 
Location: NJ
16,119 posts, read 24,792,572 times
Reputation: 16138
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sosoblessed516 View Post
Her Mom and My mom has been claiming her subsequently.

I have no contact with the child as of now. Since she’s doing remote learning. My mom and I decided it was best for her to finish the school year out with her current school. However, the teachers call and text about her not going to class, submitting her work and when she’s online having a smart mouth. She told my other sister ( not her mom) that she didn’t feel bad and wasn’t going to apologize.
You got a raw deal with not being able to claim her.

Where is she living now?
Rate this post positively Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-25-2021, 04:08 PM
 
19 posts, read 11,597 times
Reputation: 35
Quick update:

My niece is with my mom and enrolled in school there.
She emailed me saying she’s sorry. I emailed her back and she didn’t respond.
It’s still hard, I miss her dearly and pray for her always. We saw each other and didn’t speak.

My mom is constantly asking me for money to support her however. She does tell me that my niece told her she missed me and did she think I would ever let her move back home.
Rate this post positively Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-26-2021, 07:52 AM
 
Location: Mr. Roger's Neighborhood
2,532 posts, read 907,613 times
Reputation: 6794
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sosoblessed516 View Post
Quick update:

My niece is with my mom and enrolled in school there.
She emailed me saying she’s sorry. I emailed her back and she didn’t respond.
It’s still hard, I miss her dearly and pray for her always. We saw each other and didn’t speak.

My mom is constantly asking me for money to support her however. She does tell me that my niece told her she missed me and did she think I would ever let her move back home.
Thanks for the update. *hugs* This must be so difficult for you and for your niece.

Don't you dare send your mother money--not even one thin dime since she's already receiving support from your niece's father.

What you could do if you're so inclined is directly purchase things for your niece (things that are not easily resold such as electronics or a phone) that she needs or could use. That way you could bypass your mother and her habit of spending money that's meant for child support on herself instead of on your niece.
Rate this post positively Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old Today, 02:46 PM
 
4 posts
Reputation: 10
OP, stop being a victim. Everybody is using you in this situation, your sister, your mom and unfortunately, that child.

I would drop that bag of rocks and raise my middle finger at everyone. It might sound insensitive and harsh but at one point, one has to save oneself.
Rate this post positively Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply

Quick Reply
Message:


Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Parenting

All times are GMT -6.

© 2005-2021, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Contact Us - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37 - Top