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Old 03-12-2021, 04:57 AM
 
7 posts, read 1,813 times
Reputation: 27

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I am like so many other parents in America that have to fight the other parent for what is rightfully the children's! Now, I know people abuse this, but this is NOT THE CASE IN THIS MATTER.
I have 2 children who are recipients of SSI from their father who is on disability. In May 2019, I found out that I would no longer be receiving the money due to the father going to the Social Security Office and changing the authorized representative payee for both kids. (We were never married and therefore I am primary custodial parent in South Carolina. No issues with dss, police, ect) After finding out, I went to the office and told the attendant the problem, how this should not have been allowed, how the kids would not get any future payments if received by the father.
The attendant looks at me and says"WE'RE NOT DOING ALL THIS, NOW!!" And basically shuts down the matter.....
Now, I'm shocked,!! And the pandemic has not helped the matter, because I have since been in contact with the dss for child support, with the money they are supposed to receive being counted on any government assistance I try to receive. (Even though I don't see a dime and haven't since June 03 2019) And I have been on the Inspector general website for fraud, but to no avail. Our local police have been called to diffuse a situation where we were a little loud at my residence due to my asking for money for the children to obtain school pictures and for school Valentine's parties, and not only did he refuse, but he gave the cop a go to hell look for telling him that if you have kids, you need to take care of them!!
I'm lost! I don't know what to do, who to involve or contact. It's literally been causing me depression and anxiety and it's been going on for so long, that I wonder if I ever can get it resolved! Is there any one else that has been through this? How can I get someone to listen, that it start to get going in the right direction?! Raising kids is hard, but raising kids while another person parties up the funds meant for you to raise them on is infuriating!! Help!!!
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Old 03-12-2021, 08:15 AM
 
Location: Southwest Washington State
28,353 posts, read 18,773,657 times
Reputation: 44569
Contact the state legal aid office in your town. You need an attorney.

Is there any way you can work to bring in income?
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Old 03-12-2021, 08:24 AM
 
Location: In the house we finally own!
851 posts, read 483,485 times
Reputation: 4092
My ex-husband also did not want to give financial support to our kids, stating is wasn't his fault I didn't make enough money. Finally had to get lawyers involved. He paid what he was told to pay, but was very nasty about it. He would write the check, crumple it up and throw it at me (sometimes in front of the kids.)
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Old 03-12-2021, 09:11 AM
 
10,700 posts, read 19,158,540 times
Reputation: 21195
See if you have a local legal aid society. They provide some legal services for indigent people. Also find out who manages child support in your county and give them a call.
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Old 03-12-2021, 10:16 AM
 
Location: Wonderland
56,574 posts, read 44,861,970 times
Reputation: 80411
And I do want to point out that if the father has been paying child support, he is under no obligation to pay for school pictures and Valentine's Day parties and all that, generally speaking. There are very few actual bills he needs to pay in addition to paying child support usually.

My husband paid a lot of money in child support, every single month for years and years and years, and yet still, every single month, the mother of his child would present us with additional bills for things like school pictures, sport equipment, concerts, etc. My husband didn't have to pay a penny of those expenses, and yet he did. They were usually several hundred dollars a month. Later we found out that not only was she getting the money from him, she was also telling his mother that he wasn't paying it and his mother was paying "his half" as well. PLUS thinking God only knows what about her son.

And the ex wife was remarried and probably not telling her current husband, who by the way was convicted of not paying child support for years and now has a criminal record (plus he eventually also divorced this woman) that she was getting ANY money, let alone double dipping.

Nice work if you can get it. Even nicer if you can hang onto it. ("You" not meaning the OP personally.)
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Old 03-12-2021, 11:41 AM
 
8,747 posts, read 6,686,432 times
Reputation: 17965
Is the person who now receives the funds supposed to turn them over to you?
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Old 03-12-2021, 12:48 PM
 
30,884 posts, read 37,198,338 times
Reputation: 41930
Quote:
Originally Posted by Yellahead35 View Post
I am like so many other parents in America that have to fight the other parent for what is rightfully the children's! Now, I know people abuse this, but this is NOT THE CASE IN THIS MATTER.
I have 2 children who are recipients of SSI from their father who is on disability. In May 2019, I found out that I would no longer be receiving the money due to the father going to the Social Security Office and changing the authorized representative payee for both kids. (We were never married and therefore I am primary custodial parent in South Carolina. No issues with dss, police, ect) After finding out, I went to the office and told the attendant the problem, how this should not have been allowed, how the kids would not get any future payments if received by the father.
So who is the payee?
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Old 03-12-2021, 02:45 PM
 
6,832 posts, read 7,866,795 times
Reputation: 18049
Quote:
Originally Posted by KathrynAragon View Post
And I do want to point out that if the father has been paying child support, he is under no obligation to pay for school pictures and Valentine's Day parties and all that, generally speaking. There are very few actual bills he needs to pay in addition to paying child support usually.

My husband paid a lot of money in child support, every single month for years and years and years...
Sounds like my ex. A miserable, angry, narcisstic lawyer who used every dirty trick, that only a lawyer would know about, to make my patenting as difficult as possible.

I Paid a TON in child support, and would have paid for all those extra things like winter coats and school pictures and parties and sports equipment and on and on, but my ex made it so difficult for me to even see the children that none of those extras ever got paid by me. The ex thought she was being so cute and clever by punishing me...and in the end, who suffers? The children, who have absolutely zero to do with the disagreement between the parents.

The whole process is SO rotten.
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Old 03-12-2021, 06:21 PM
 
5,816 posts, read 5,130,306 times
Reputation: 17611
There is a difference between SSDI and SSI. SSDI is what you get if you had a work record. SSI is what you get if you never worked. If a person is on SSDI, usually there is an additional 50% payment to the children. If a person is on SSI, there is no payment to the children. SSDI is GARNISHABLE for child support. SSI is NOT. Clearly, he is on SSDI, and he recently directed that the extra 50% for the children be paid to HIM, not to you. But the kids live with you. Tje judge is NOT gonna like this.

Stop dealing with the man. Start dealing through the courts. File for child support on Monday morning, at the court, based upon his total income, which means the 150% SSDI, plus any earnings he has. If he has additional declared or under the table earnings, file for that, too. The courts will take care of it for you. Do it immediately, because they'll back date it through the date that you file it. So you will eventually get all he owes you, garnished out of his SSDI. In fact, if you can convince the court that he has additional earnings (people on SSDI are allowed to earn about an extra thousand a month without any reduction in SSDI), you may wind up getting MORE than the 50% for the kids - they may take his entire SSDI if they think he's also earning under the table. Even if you cannot convince them of that, they may take 50% of his entire SSDI-plus-kids award amount, which means you'd wind up getting 75% of that total, rather than the 50% that was being sent to you.

If he comes anywhere NEAR you to argue with you about this, get a restraining order. What a POS, stealing from his children. Is he really disabled, or is that BS, too?
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Old 03-12-2021, 07:15 PM
 
Location: USA
1,936 posts, read 705,177 times
Reputation: 5293
I assume you have a court order of support from Family Court. What does it say?

Last edited by Lillie767; 03-12-2021 at 07:48 PM.. Reason: Delete reference to divorce.
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