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17 y/o stepson @ home. I understand teens like to eat ... but yesterday I bought a lb of turkey. Stepson ate some of it. Then today he is eating more of it and says to me "the turkey is gone can you get more?"
HE ATE A LB OF TURKEY IN A DAY!!! Meanwhile he is not the only one living here ... it's also me & my husband who like turkey too.
I feel like he should know better though ... like I should not have to explain to a teenager why it's not cool to eat an entire lb of turkey so that no one else can have it.
Right or wrong?
Well I told him since he works he can go get more turkey. I am not going back to the grocery store and taking time off work so he can eat another lb by himself again.
17 y/o stepson @ home. I understand teens like to eat ... but yesterday I bought a lb of turkey. Stepson ate some of it. Then today he is eating more of it and says to me "the turkey is gone can you get more?"
HE ATE A LB OF TURKEY IN A DAY!!! Meanwhile he is not the only one living here ... it's also me & my husband who like turkey too.
I feel like he should know better though ... like I should not have to explain to a teenager why it's not cool to eat an entire lb of turkey so that no one else can have it.
Right or wrong?
Well I told him since he works he can go get more turkey. I am not going back to the grocery store and taking time off work so he can eat another lb by himself again.
I have 2 teens. They eat a lot. I don't know if it's a "he should know better" situation. Maybe whoever does the shopping needs to buy more food.
MY husband does contribute. It's shared $$ to feed the family. Not sure how that's relevant but shouldn't a 17 year old know that they need to share?
Was I wrong to think this is common sense?
Sharing, to me, means you are all in the kitchen making sandwiches at the same time, and everyone gets turkey. Unless it is stated, I don't see this is a sharing issue. My kids have been doing school and eating lunch at home for a year. I quickly learned they eat a lot. Next time, buy more turkey.
Cool. I did it once. It was convenient for the most part but they don't always have the timeslot available you want right? I hated how much the prices were jacked up ... but I also hate going to the grocery store too lol. It's part & parcel with being an adult, though so it's ok. It's just like something ya gotta do. I wonder if they'll deliver to rural areas?
It's not the act of shopping so much as it is the drive. We have 2 houses ... one in the country and one more in the suburbs. We alternate between them both ... so the country house there's not many grocery stores nearby. The suburb house it's like a 5 min drive so it's not too bad.
Quote:
Originally Posted by germaine2626
Another thought occurred to me. If your husband is working seven days a week, is your husband really able to spend enough quality time with his son? Since you are also working seven days a week, are you really able to spend enough quality time with your step-son? Heck, are you and your husband even able to have enough quality time with each other? Slightly off topic, just food for thought.
IMHO, working seven days a week is manageable in the short run, during "the busy season" or to save up for a special purchase such as the down payment for a house. But in the long run is it really worth it? I am retired from a demanding career, and the vast majority of my friend are also retired from demanding careers. Almost all of us have regrets about working so many hours that we put off couple's or family activities or weekend adventures while they were working.
Try looking at "the big picture" more often.
Have a great day.
Ya, this. You choose to work 7 days/week and live in the country, away from stores. If you don't have time to go to the store, how do you have time to enjoy the things you are buying with the money from the jobs, not to mention spend time with the growing teen?
Teenagers eat a lot. Then after they eat a lot, they go back and eat some more.
With children and especially with teens, you have to be very specific and very precise and then you have to repeat yourself over and over. If you don't want him to eat the turkey, you must tell him. If you want him to eat some of the turkey and leave the rest for other family members, you have to tell him. Then tell him again about the apples and tell him again about the cheese, and again about the bread.
When you get home from shopping, you say,"hey kiddo. I bought turkey lunch meat and that is for everyone to share. Your father and I want turkey sandwiches for lunch this week, so don't eat more than a third of it and leave the rest for someone else. When you eat it, don't put more than three slices into each of your sandwiches." Otherwise, he is going to gulp it down at one go along with several other things.
Not the advice you asked for, but I am going to give it anyway. If the budget can be stretched that far, you will be happier in the long run if the kid eats lots of protein and fruit and veggies. He will be healthier and he will behave better than he would if he is eating lots of sugar and chips and soda and junk food.
Teens want food they can grab and eat and not cook. So having sandwich makings available is good. Fruit if he will eat it. Those raw veggie trays with veggie sticks and ranch dressing, if he will eat that. Canned tuna, frozen burritos, that sort of thing.
As others have mentioned, maybe if you are running out of food between shopping trips, you need to increase the amount you are buying (again, if the budget will stretch). You are actually getting off light. My teen always has 2-3 teenage boy buddies hanging out at our place and it was like a horde of locusts flew through and stripped the cupboards bare. A pound of turkey wouldn't make a snack. I used to roast a whole 20 pound turkey and the buzzards would strip it to the bare bones and then I'd make soup from the bones and they would devour it by the gallon. They could eat a 2 pound block of cheese and an entire loaf of bread in one sitting.
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I think the key is, as many have said, you need to buy more groceries.
When I had teen boys at home, they could wipe out the fridge and pantry in an afternoon, if they had a couple friends over. All the lunchmeat, a frozen pizza, the frozen sausages and tortillas, chips, and finally peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Chips and picante.
The key is to have enough food on hand, and as many have pointed out, the one pound container of turkey isn't going to last the week.
You want the boy to feel like this is his home - if he's having to monitor his eating and make sure there's always enough left for you to eat any choice you also want, you've got a child who's trying to be invisible. Which is NOT a good thing.
This is not the same thing as a person who takes two hamburger patties off the platter when there are clearly only one per person at the table. That's a situational awareness thing that needs to be quickly corrected - COUNT the people at the table, and don't take 2 patties when that would leave someone with none.
This turkey thing - you just need to buy more food so there is flexibility in what you can find to eat.
Not much to add, just agreeing that teenage boys eat A LOT and the turkey thing sometimes happen. It was fine to send him to the store to get more turkey or you could have sent him to Subway to pick you up some turkey subs, whatever worked best.
In the grand scheme of things this rates very low on the Big Deal meter.
MY husband does contribute. It's shared $$ to feed the family. Not sure how that's relevant but shouldn't a 17 year old know that they need to share?
Was I wrong to think this is common sense?
I think a kid of 17 should know not to eat all of something by himself without asking if anyone else in the house wanted some first. "Hey, guys, I really like this turkey! Do you want some, or can I finish it off?"
I was one of seven kids, though, so we probably learned this early. I'm still hesitant to take the last of something, even with my S.O. Sounds like he is an only child, but he still should have been taught this earlier than 17, IMO.
ETA: After reading through some of the other posts, I see that there's a general consensus that teenage boys eat a lot, lol. I had one skinny daughter, so this never came up.
Still, you would be a doing him a favor to teach him to ask first. He might have a roommate or a wife someday, and he'll need to know not to eat everything without checking with the others in his life.
Last edited by Mightyqueen801; 05-12-2021 at 11:36 AM..
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