I had to ground my son for the entire summer (babysitter, legal)
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My son is seventeen and will be repeating his junior year of school. He has received all Fs and he is grounded for the entire summer. This means:
- No TV
- No Computer
- No Video Games
- No Desserts
- No door
- No iPhone
- He will be allowed to come with us on our beach vacation, but he must stay inside the hotel room for the entirety of the trip with no access to the TV. We have arranged a babysitter with the hotel.
I know this year has been very hard for students due to the pandemic, but that is NO EXCUSE for my son to slack off and fail all of his classes.
You are going to take a 17 year old on a vacation where you are going to force him to stay inside the hotel room with a babysitter the entire time?
I say this with genuine concern but you should look into family counseling. This is not an appropriate scenario and isn't going to give you the results you are hoping for.
I hear you, 100%, but is there a way you can make the summer productive instead of just punitive? Summer classes or online courses, LOTS of chores around the house, lessons on responsibility, etc.
My oldest is almost 15 so I really may be talking out of my backside, but sometimes forcing them to be productive is a pretty good punishment!
Your son is only a year or less from legal adulthood. Don't you think it might be a better idea to help him get back on track than to practically torture him until he is old enough to escape?
You are going to take a 17 year old on a vacation where you are going to force him to stay inside the hotel room with a babysitter the entire time?
I say this with genuine concern but you should look into family counseling. This is not an appropriate scenario and isn't going to give you the results you are hoping for.
Quote:
Originally Posted by gus2
I hear you, 100%, but is there a way you can make the summer productive instead of just punitive? Summer classes or online courses, LOTS of chores around the house, lessons on responsibility, etc.
My oldest is almost 15 so I really may be talking out of my backside, but sometimes forcing them to be productive is a pretty good punishment!
Quote:
Originally Posted by vicky3vicky
Your son is only a year or less from legal adulthood. Don't you think it might be a better idea to help him get back on track than to practically torture him until he is old enough to escape?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Frostnip
It'd make more sense to get him into a credit recovery summer school program and make getting privileges back contingent on finishing classes.
All of these. OP, what exactly do you hope to accomplish? All I see is punishment, which will do nothing to bring your son's grades back on track. I see a miserable summer ahead for the entire family, and a resentful teen with no motivation to do better.
I am 100% in agreement with Mattie and the others. My first impression reading the OP was HARSH, too harsh, excessive. Where is the hope? Where is the help for him to improve? Punishment teaches little, other than to avoid the person(s) or situation which bring about excessive punishment.
In dog training, I use NO punishment at all. Zip, zero, nada. I use reward and retraining. It's the same with children. What is the purpose of this punishment? To turn your son against you? to teach him resentment towards you? To make him hate school and everything about it? If it's to make him WANT to study or apply himself, this draconian punishment will not accomplish that goal.
You said your son "slacked off" - what encouragement, help did you give him when you learned he was in danger of failing? How did you help him? Was he having trouble learning? Or was he simply not doing any work? If it was the latter, how did you encourage him to do the work/read? Did you make a set time? Did you ask him why he wasn't doing the work?
You should take as much responsibility for this outcome as your son to be honest.
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