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They’d be screaming about something- eating disorders commonly develop after age 10 in middle school or high school. A girl who is more developed at 10-11 often gets unwanted comments, likely from both girls and boys. That sort of attention is usually unwanted and wildly inappropriate.
I don't understand...who is the "They" specifically doing this screaming?
You should go visit the thread in Psychology on teddy bears and crying rooms for a different perspective on protecting children from life's unpleasantries.
I'm 1 of 4 girls, never had a brother. However, from some of the experiences in this thread seem to suggest that boys may store energy in advance for major growth spurts planned by the body for the future! Wherein that part of the body goes from being extra large to being quite flat as the boy's body gets taller, etc. You might want to try finding out if your son has any male blood relatives who experienced that, & f so, sharing that fact with your son.
My son had a big butt - it went away. I would buy your son better fitting pants. If needed have the pants tailored. Make sure his shirts reach below his butt.
When children are pressured into transitioning, any teasing/harassment regarding attributes of opposite sex should be stopped immediately.
I'm 1 of 4 girls, never had a brother. However, from some of the experiences in this thread seem to suggest that boys may store energy in advance for major growth spurts planned by the body for the future! Wherein that part of the body goes from being extra large to being quite flat as the boy's body gets taller, etc. You might want to try finding out if your son has any male blood relatives who experienced that, & f so, sharing that fact with your son.
This sounds about right to me. My son developed a bit of a gut. He was taller than me, maybe 5'8" at the time. Over the course of the next couple of years he grew to be 6'3". He had also gotten into weight lifting so it was a pretty big transformation.
I don't understand...who is the "They" specifically doing this screaming?
You should go visit the thread in Psychology on teddy bears and crying rooms for a different perspective on protecting children from life's unpleasantries.
I don’t know what this has to do with body shaming with touching being inappropriate. This sort of behavior, particularly in middle school, can have lifelong negative effects. I’ve met a lot of people who have experienced this, and it’s definitely not just been women. I have met some men who everyone seemed to really like and who lots of women were really eager to date, but they still had the middle school view of themselves as the awkward teen. We’re now to a point where people are no longer accepting this behavior, for good reason.
If you touch another person's butt, genitals, breasts when it is unwanted, that's sexual harassment. Just because it is happening to a boy in this instance or "the harasser didn't intend it to be sexual" is irrelevant. That's like saying I could grab a woman's breast in the grocery store this morning and tell the police officer, "but I didn't mean it to be sexual. I'm a straight woman." Who gives a whoop if I meant it to be sexual or not?
An eleven year old smacking another boy's butt is old enough to know better and receive consequences, or would that same behavior be okay when they turn around and do it to a girl in the class?
Sure, put the slapper on the sex offender rolls that makes so much sense.
If you touch another person's butt, genitals, breasts when it is unwanted, that's sexual harassment. Just because it is happening to a boy in this instance or "the harasser didn't intend it to be sexual" is irrelevant. That's like saying I could grab a woman's breast in the grocery store this morning and tell the police officer, "but I didn't mean it to be sexual. I'm a straight woman." Who gives a whoop if I meant it to be sexual or not?
An eleven year old smacking another boy's butt is old enough to know better and receive consequences, or would that same behavior be okay when they turn around and do it to a girl in the class?
The OP's son wasn't touched or slapped. Sounds more like preadolescent horseplay than anything else to me.
Idk what the answer is, but don't football players act like this?
If it was a girl you would agree with me 100%. Double standards work both ways.
Don't be crazy.
OP, this is very normal. Kids are complete jerks and will grab on to something and mercilessly tease their peers. I know it sounds cruel but this is true for kids with diabilities or overweight kids or because they look different or dress a certain way or whatever. Kids will make fun of other kids. They are making fun of something physical because it is easy and is fun for a group of kids to have a common thing to make fun of and tease. Makes them feel closer as a group and makes them feel better about themselves. You can let the administrators/teachers know what is happening so they can try to keep a watchful eye but this is very common. Talk it through with your kid, this is a good teaching moment on developing sense of self and not needing the approval of others and developing empathy for others.
Also, this sometimes is a good thing. FOr example, when kids hit puberty they start to stink but their washing habits don't always change and they don't listed to their parents. When their "friends" tell them they stink or their hair is a mess, etc. they are more apt to take action.
Sorry this is happening to your kid, use it to make them a stronger and better person.
Oh dear. Let's hope we're not going in the direction of all unintended or intended touching as meaning you have criminal sexual tendencies. Please?
Can think of dozens of times in my long life, those awkward moments during play or other times when, I have grabbed or touched the wrong part on the wrong person. Even gave a total stranger a very cozy hug when I turned too fast thinking DH was behind me and embraced an unfamiliar man. We both smiled. Guess we didn't know I had sexually assaulted him.
Years ago my teenaged son was in a haunted house and ended up exposed when two little girls behind him, frightened to go alone, were hanging onto the back of his pants. One big fright and pants down. The boys came home laughing but embarrassed.
Think how that all could have been twisted if the wrong person caught the picture at the moment. It could have been life destroying for the girls and him if it got into the hands of over-educated but indiscriminate adults.
We have sexual monsters among us and it's important not to create more than there are. Please be very careful with an accusation that you have observable, witnessed word or behavior before you create a scenario based on your experience. Eye of the beholder, remember.
Just as body shaming can cause disturbed behavior, being accused of something deviant can cause mental and behavioral problems for people, too.
We all did better when there wasn't so much focus with fear.
I think one of the reasons people in earlier generations surmounted these psychological barriers could have been an adult's light response to it. The bigger the deal we make about a child's fears and hurts the more value they will have to the child. Whole book here about that.
OP, you could share a story about your youth when you were unhappy about a body part if you are comfortable with that. Tell him the stunning secret that most kids around his age have that secret too, even the kewl ones.
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