Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
We are hoping to move to NC soon. We have a 18 yo and 14 yo. My question is about my 18 yo. She says there's no way she's moving to NC. Now, we want her to move with us, but b/c she's 18, that's up to her. The thing is she doesn't have a job at this time. Therefore, there's no way possible she could survive on her own. Her friends will only let her stay with them so long from what I think. From experience or opinions, what do you likely think will happen? I know your not fortune tellers either...LOL
If she's in high school, I'd try to work a deal out so she can finish there. Maybe a friend's parents will put her up if you offer to pay her expenses. If she's out of school, her options are to get a job and her own place or move with you. If she decides to stay, you can offer her bus fare to NC. We've never faced this, but some of our kid's friends have and they stayed to finish school, living with friends. Most then moved away to college or got jobs and their own place.
If she's in high school, I'd try to work a deal out so she can finish there. Maybe a friend's parents will put her up if you offer to pay her expenses. If she's out of school, her options are to get a job and her own place or move with you. If she decides to stay, you can offer her bus fare to NC. We've never faced this, but some of our kid's friends have and they stayed to finish school, living with friends. Most then moved away to college or got jobs and their own place.
In that case, I'd put it to her that she needs to find a job and start thinking about finding a place to live. You can help her out to get her started, but she'll need to support herself eventually. When you do leave, her options are to stay or go with you. If she stays, give her the bus fare option if she changes her mind.
Since you know the time line for when you are moving, I would tell her that if she wishes to stay she has until a certain date (a few days or a week before you move) to find a job, a place to live, and transportation (if she doesn't already have a car). If she hasn't made those arrangements by the given deadline, then she has proven that she can't make it on her own and should move with you. I know she is technically an adult, but not all 18 year olds are ready to be on their own.
I think she'll move with you...on her own without confrontation.
If you just ignore her verbalized refusal, if and when you folks are packing up to leave, I'm betting she'll have her stuff packed and, without a word, get in the car.
I think she'll move with you...on her own without confrontation.
If you just ignore her verbalized refusal, if and when you folks are packing up to leave, I'm betting she'll have her stuff packed and, without a word, get in the car.
Just my experience.
I hope so! I can see her saying I'm staying, She'll stay for 3-4 days and that will be all that she'll be able to survive. Then we'll have to be the ones to make arrangements to get her to NC. UGHH! She'll have her own car, but I really wouldn't want her to drive by herself all the way from FL.
I think she'll move with you...on her own without confrontation.
If you just ignore her verbalized refusal, if and when you folks are packing up to leave, I'm betting she'll have her stuff packed and, without a word, get in the car.
Me and my family are moving from FL to NC too. Leaving in 7 months. My son is only 18 months tho. But I was in the same situation that you and your family was in when I was 18. Except I was still in school. My parents were going to work it out to where I was going to finish my senior year and stay with family but after school i had to say bubye unless i found a place of my own to live. But it panned out that my dad didnt take the job offer so we never moved. But i remember how i didnt want to leave all my friends and such.
Anyway i agree with the previous posters set a date before your move and if she hasn't made anything happen she is really going to have no other choice but to go with you. Just don't make a huge thing about it because it might cause her to rebel even more and you don't want the added stress.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
