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You can't put an age on it, everyone is different and ready at different times. Nelly summed it up perfectly....
I completely agree (and didn't vote either). Nelly expressed what I feel as well on this question.
DH and I are in our 40s and had our first children in March and I just can't imagine doing what we're doing now had we not had everything in place that Nelly mentioned. Obviously, we would have done whatever it takes (and do) but we're in a good place right now and we're going to be able to give the best we can to our children.
Before 25, if at all possible. I'm 27 now, and definitely am too old. I'm childfree, and mostly I love my life, but my age is a factor in my decision. No way am I going to start having kids at 28.
My FIL was 33 when he had my husband and 37 when he had SIL. These days, that sounds reasonable, maybe even young. But he probably won't live to see much of his grandchildren, if he lives to see any born at all.
27 is FAR from too old. My mom was 27 when she had my brother, 35 when she had me, and 37 when she had my sister. My dad was 7 years older than my mom so he was 44 when his last one was born. They were wonderful parents. My daughter was 27 with the first and 30 with the second. Fantastic mother. I know a woman who was 40 with first and 43 with second. Loves being a mother more than she loved being a journalist who traveled the world. My oldest granddaughter is having her first at 28 and is so excited she can think of nothing else. The world is full of happy moms that didn't start until after 27 and happy children that had them as mothers.
By the way, my father lived to see his GREAT grandchildren and mom lived to see a GREAT GREAT grandchild. People are not dying off at 60 as much anymore you know.
I agree with Nelly's post, though I'd add in that I feel it would be ideal for the couple to wait until they can live on one income so that mom (or dad) can stay home with their kids until they are school-aged. This takes sacrifice and hard work, but it's definitely doable! I was 22 (almost 23) when I had my first child, and I still had to work for over a year before I could stay home full-time with him. In my case, waiting until I was 25 would have been prudent, but of course now I would not change things for the world!
Unfortunately for some people it may never happen...living on single income thing. I know here in New York City my family would have never survived.
I chose 25. I had my dd at 31 and my son at 34 and I know I don't have the same energy than when I was in my 20's. I sometimes think I would like to have a third but I can't picture myself at 40 chasing after a toddler. Also my body has not recovered so well from my last pregnancy. I have a lot of back problems.
My MIL had my dh when she was 45 and my FIL was 51. He feels he missed out on all the fun father-son things like playing ball. My FIL passed when my dd was less than 1yo. My MIL may live another 10 or so years so I don't expect her at my dd wedding.
My dh has been dealing with elderly parents issues in his 30's at the same time my father was dealing with then in his 60's.
I voted 25 because that's the age when most people are finished with college and have a high-paying job to support a family. I've heard many times about the negative effects of teen pregnancies and IMHO no one should give up education for a baby.
I had my kids at 32, 34 & 37 - ideally, I would have had started a few years earlier, but since I did not marry my husband until I was 31, that was not possible.
I voted 25 because that's the age when most people are finished with college and have a high-paying job to support a family. I've heard many times about the negative effects of teen pregnancies and IMHO no one should give up education for a baby.
This is why I voted 25 too.
I got pregnant with my firstborn when I was 19, had him when I was 20. I was in no way ready... but I matured really quickly, and I think I've done an excellent job. It's been rough though. I was in college when I got pregnant, dropped out due to pregnancy complications, said I'd go back when he was 2 or so... (didn't happen, I was trying to survive!)
Well when he was 2 I got married (big mistake, all the wrong reasons)... mostly because I wanted more kids and I found someone who loved my son and wanted another child also and was big on me being a SAHM. So when my firstborn was 5, we had the second. I was going to be a SAHM until he entered preschool at least, so at least around age 3.5, then go back to school..
That didn't work out for lots of ugly reasons (my ex's alcholism and chronic depression), and I ended up finding part time jobs that would let me take my kids along, daycare work and such. I was never able to focus on school, because I spent the latter part of our marriage focusing on survival, paying the bills, and making sure my ex didn't get drunk and take off and wreck the car (again). We ended up divorcing when the youngest was 5, and I still had no education beyond 2 semesters of community college, and had to get right back into the workforce.
So, here I am, 36, trying to go back to school, struggling to take care of the kids. With a much better partner, but still it's a struggle. So I would, if I could go back in time, have definitely finished school FIRST, and while I adore my "babies" I would have just pushed it back a few years. I would strongly recommend that anyone contemplating children finish their education beforehand.... I still sometimes wish for "one more" but there's no way we could afford it. By the time I'm finished with school I will be "too old" (not saying anyone else at that age is too old)... because I don't want to be 40 and starting all over with a baby.
Definately depends on your circumstances. I voted 25. I had my first a few days shy of my 25th birthday and my 2nd at 27. Perfect timing for me. My husband is quite a few yrs older than I am (I married a bachelor ). He was 39 and 41 respectively when our kids were born. With our age gap it wasnt an option but if it was, he would have liked to have kids sooner. At 43 he finds it a bit hard to keep up with our toddler and preschooler.
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